Throwback to: the Unstoppable Exhibit

Back in March earlier this year, we hosted our first ever opening night for an art project close to our hearts: the Unstoppable Exhibit.

This idea turned into so much more thanks to the many people we met along the way. Before we knew it, what was supposed to be a simple group photoshoot filled with “badassery” became a fundraiser against domestic violence, supporting 2 beautiful charities.

Now, a few months later, it is finally time for us to look back at this wonderful night and tell you everything.

Before the big day
(also known as how we were blown away by people's support.)

We already shared with you how we even came to build this project here. Now, we were a few days away from our big opening night and it was time to roll up our sleeves to prep an event we had never planned before.

It was really important for us to offer an art show à la Française. Not only did the show need to look clean and professional, but we wanted people to dress up, be able to have wine (in real wine glasses!), food and mingle.

The first step that made our hearts sing was getting the prints. When we picked up all the prints from Fotobox, we finally felt like everything we were doing was for real.

The second step was getting an official sticker, like in museum. You can't imagine the feeling of accomplishment a simple sticker on the wall can do. Saman Design took care of this for us, purely out of kindness.

Of course, the set up wasn't without any troubles. Some of the walls were concrete and the only way to hang anything from them was to drill. We can do many things, but drilling concrete is not one of them! Another kind soul named Cormack drove out of his way to make this happen for us.

After a solid 10 hours, a lot of nails and swearing, everything was set up and ready to go for the next day.

The big night
(also knows as : when reality exceeds expectations)

We were both pretty relaxed having set up the day before. Paradise Grapevine and Downtown Winery had generously donated wine, the food had been ordered, glasses were delivered. We expected to just set up the last minute things, relax and partake in the festivities with everybody else.

We told ourselves : if we have 30 people and manage to raise a $1000, we will consider it a big win. We're such a tiny business, absolute beginners in planning art shows, this is already quite the accomplishment.

We sold out at 55 tickets and raised over $3000.

Now, you may think 55 people isn't a big deal. For this space, it is. We were absolutely packed. People showed up right when the doors opened and ended up lining up at the door trying to get last minute tickets.

 
 

Meanwhile: we were in way over our heads

We are not going to lie to you, this entire evening is a blur and taught us many lessons such as: we should have thought more about the actual evening. We worked so hard on the before that we kind of forgot to see what work will need to be done during the opening night.

For example: we should have had staff. We ended up having to wash wines glasses, serve said wine, take care of print sales, and walk people through the exhibit. Luckily, a few friends saw our struggles and jumped in, but we wish we had spent more time talking to everybody the way we wanted to.

To our surprise, we also sold most of the prints for the evening. It was absolutely incredible for us as it was a testament that we went from an entrepreneur position back to artists.

 

This experience is our proudest achievement in our careers so far. We have many ideas brewing at the moment, and we know for a fact that we will be doing it again.

Since videos speak louder than words, you can see below a short clip of the entire evening.

You will also see that we had wonderful performers who donated their talent during the evening. Avah Coco is an amazing singer and Petra Queen of the Nile is a kick-ass burlesque dancer. Thank you both for honouring us with your talents.

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Everyone is sensual

Sensuality… a big scary word. If you ask people how they would define sensuality, we can bet that most likely they will tell you it is somehow related to sexuality, and they would not be 100% wrong. It is very true that sexuality is a little part of it, but there is so much more to sensuality than sex only.

We already wrote a blog about sensuality so if you need a good reminder or if you want to learn more about it, we invite you to read it here. In today’s blog we will talk more about the shame and fear people can feel with the idea of being sensual.

Understanding sensuality

beautiful woman wearing black lacy lingerie and venetian mask on a black background with red curtains

A lot of people are having a hard time to let go to become the best version of themselves. Especially women. We are told from a very young age to not make too much noise, nor take too much space. We grew up hearing how slutty some clothing make us look and that we should always act in proper manners in order to be desired. When we spend so many years listening to people telling us how we should behave and what clothes we should wear, the idea of accepting ourselves as sensual beings can feel confusing and scary.

It is hard to reprogram our way of thinking, but believe us when we say everyone is sensual, it is just a matter of finding what this word means to you and how you want to incorporate it in your life.

It is also important to understand that those negative feeling you might have are only coming from the media or the environment you grew up in. Sensuality is still stigmatized because it is confused with sexuality (sex being a taboo topic 😒). As mentioned above, those two terms can be related but in a general way sensuality is the ability to be connected to all your senses and experience life in a more energetic way.

You can find sensuality in watching a beautiful sunset, eating a tasteful dish, moving your body freely to the rhythm of music, listening to your favourite music, smelling flowers, being naked in the softest clothes you own, feel the sun on your skin… But you can of course also experience those senses in the arms of your lover.

Sensuality is not just about sexual pleasure, it’s about the positive feelings and the level of happiness those moments are bringing into your life.

The first steps to take

If it is hard for you to feel sensual or you are telling yourself that you are absolutely not sensual, our first advice for you is to give more love to your body. Since sensuality is related to our senses, you cannot expect to experience it while having a bad relationship with your body.

Your body is not your enemy! Give it the same love and care you will give to your best friend. Learn to accept it fully, even the parts about yourself you don’t like. Here is what you can do when you have a moment to yourself alone:

  • Enjoy being nude

    Being naked is one of the best feeling in the world and it is so empowering. You can start just by spending time in your apartment topless wearing just your panties (read, watch a movie, water your plants, whatever task you fee like doing in the moment). Then once you are familiar with being topless, try again fully nude. It will feel weird at first but the more you practice the more you will enjoy it. It is also a great exercise to see your body nude in another scenario than showering or having sex.

  • Give your body compliments

    Once again even for the parts you don’t like about yourself. Strip down and go in front of a mirror (full body mirror if you have one). Look deeply at yourself and with kind eyes, and give yourself compliments. Yes it is a hard exercise and yes you might feel silly about doing it but trust us it will help a lot. Plus no one will never know so you have nothing to lose doing it.

  • Reconnect with your beautiful body

    Don’t be afraid to touch your skin, your curves, but not in a sexual way. Just to feel your own hands on yourself, activate your sense of touch, and feel the gentle sparks it is creating.

Changing the way we see ourselves starts with wanting to change and be willing to make those changes. We are not saying it is easy but it is mental. We have been conditioned to hate our body and think we need to “fix” it by the beauty industry so they could sell us products and services we don’t need. You are born with the body you have, and if that body doesn’t look like what you see on tv or in magazines, it does not mean your body is not beautiful or that you are not desirable.

Accepting your natural beauty and learning to love yourself will add so much power and freedom in your life.

Practice those exercises daily and it will get easier. Once you start to feel more at ease with the way you look and experience new things in life that will activate all of your senses, sensuality will become part of who your are.

 
gorgeous and nude black woman laying down in a bathtub in purple water
 

In our opinion sensuality is very important as it is a great tool to increase confidence and self-esteem. It also make you radiate positive energies and makes you glow ❤️

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Why boudoir photos are a great Christmas gift

Don't get us wrong, a boudoir shoot should definitely be done for yourself before anything. It's your chance to get quality "me-time”, try something new, and more importantly: reconnect with your body the way you want. But, if you feel like it, sharing your boudoir images with your special someone is a beautiful, genuine gift that's hard to top!

You're showing a version of yourself your partner might not know.

 
 

God knows this is hard, especially when you've been with someone for a long time and have built a life together. Many of our clients have shared with us that their partner did not expect them to ever do a boudoir shoot and how much of a "wow”factor it was when they told them. It was even more special to them, like they were let in on a little sexy secret.

Or... you're showing them the "You" they haven't seen in a while.

While it is hard to find new things about each other, it is even harder to step away from your role within your family. The care-taker, the parent, you-name-it… When a routine is established, we don't get many chances to let our sexy selves shine. That's everything boudoir is about: stepping out of your daily tasks and bringing some spice back!

It's not a "boring” gift.

Getting socks and underwear is useful, but we bet your partner would take risqué photos of yourself instead in a heartbeat! Sharing boudoir photos is so meaningful because it is exclusive, vulnerable and genuine. Chances are nobody else but you two will see them, and that makes it extra special.

 
 

It's also a gift for yourself (eheh)

Talk about the ultimate win-win situation: you get to experience an empowering, liberating moment and get a confidence boost in the process, and your partner gets a reminder of how beautiful their special someone is. And it doesn't stop there! Boudoir has many wonderful long-lasting effects that will without a doubt affect your happiness on the positive.

As you can tell, if you are looking for a great way to impress your partner and share something truly meaningful with them, look no further: your boudoir photos will do the trick.

And what a good timing that is when we've set up the perfect boudoir experience for the holidays with our Boudoir Under The Tree special!

Click on the button below to enjoy a discounted mini session and more.

You can also join our weekly love letter to get good vibes in your inbox every Saturday! ⬇️

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Finding sensuality in winter time

Winter is coming with its Christmas’ vibe… and we are very excited about it! In our opinion winter in Canada is magical (well at least when the snow is still white instead of being covered with pollution) ❄️.

The problem with winter here is that it last for a longgg timeee. So many months of cold and grey(ish) weather can easily affects us in a negative way and make us fall in a poor self-care never ending circle. Which, you can guess, is hard on the feeling of being sensual.

 
curvy woman on couch
 

If you want to live your life in the most happiest way possible, it is really important to take good care of your body and mind. In order to do so, you have to put yourself as a priority. Otherwise you let all the stress from your everyday routine take control of your well being. This is when anxiety, fatigue, fear (and all that jazz) show the tip of their nose.

So why is sensuality so important?

It helps to feel in harmony with our body, which increases our self-confidence. And since sensuality is connected to all of our senses, it also develops our creativity, imagination and intuition.

We know sensuality can be a scary word, as a lot of people think it is only related to sexuality. But it is not! Sensuality is the ability to feel in touch with all of our senses.

Here are 5 ways to feel sensual again in winter time:

Movement

We put this on top of our list because this is VERY important, not only for sensuality but also for your health. So write it down somewhere or take a mental note:

You have to incorporate movements in your routine!

Being “stuck inside", having to work from home and spending most of our days sitting on a chair or a sofa is really bad for our body. It makes our muscles week, creates tightness in our back and neck, and decreases our level of energy.

if you motivate yourself to move your body often during the day, your productivity and mood will skyrocket. And honestly it is an easy habit to create. For example:

  • Do some yoga in the morning and gentle stretching during the day.

  • Take a break from work and dance like nobody's watching.

    Or just move your body slowly and the way you want it, without making it pretty.

Moving your body will make you feel more connected to it and at peace with yourself.

Self-Care

woman standing up eyes closed covering herself with black kimono in front o red wall

Taking care of this body of yours is also primordial. We like to imaging our body is its own little person that needs attention, the same way you will give it to a loved one, a pet or a plant. It needs love and care in order to grow strong and beautiful. Here is how you can give it some lovin’:

  • Put some make up on and do your hair if it makes you feel good.

  • Make yourself a hot bath or get massage to relax.

  • Take the time to moisturize every inches of your skin and feel the lotion deeply nourishing it.

Food

Yes, believe us when we say food as the power to develop your sensuality. There is a common saying french people like to say after a delicious meal:

“It was as good as an orgasm!”

It does not mean we had one while eating, but it means the feeling of peace and joy was the same an orgasm can give you. Quality food is all about flavours. Forget about salt and sugar, we are talking about explosion of aromas that can increase your level of happiness and peace :)

  • Learn to cook healthy and tasty meals.

  • Go buy yourself some delicious french pastries.

  • Order your favourite food and take the time to enjoy each flavours.

Sexuality

Even if sensuality is not only about sex, it is an important part of it. In this part we want to talk about self-sexuality and forget about potential partners for a minute.

You have to know your body by heart in order to feel fully at peace with it. You cannot be afraid to touch and look at it, and discover what parts of your body are the most sensitive.

They are so many ways to play with and learn about your body, and by yourself. You can start by lighting up some candles, listen to musics that help you relax or turn you on… it will put you in the mood. Once you have set up everything your way, you can try different things, such as:

  • Breathing exercises and energy movements (this is a bit more spiritual) to help you reconnect with your body.

  • Touch EVERY PARTS of your body, apply different types of pressure or speed. This will help you understand where and how you like to be touched.

  • Be curious about toys (yes even if you have a partner, it can actually be a cool add on to your sex life). You can find a variety of toys: static or with vibrations; different sizes, shapes, colours and texture.

*Little side note: if you are looking to empower your sexuality, we highly suggest to check out Layla Martin work!

 
woman wearing white lingerie laying down on white couch
 

And of course boudoir!

Last but definitely not least on today’s list is boudoir photography. This is the perfect experience to discover and play with your sensuality during a time that is for you and you only! No need to wear a disguise for your shoot, you are the one choosing the vibes you want to create and will bring the outfits and props that make you feel your most sensual-self.

Of course there are so many other ways to embrace your sensuality, you just have to experience and be curious.

Now you know what to do, go make sensuality part of your everyday routine!

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5 mistakes to avoid when taking your sexy pictures

Raise your hand if you have ever wanted to take a spicy photo of yourself and ended up struggling and feeling frustrated and awkward? Yep, been there, done that.

Don't get us wrong, of course you should book a boudoir session with a professional (aka us!). But if you're feeling a little adventurous and are dying to experiment a little bit by yourself with your beloved cellphone, here are a few common mistakes you can avoid.

 
 

1) Too low or too high is never flattering.

This is the main mistake we see when people are taking selfies, they tend to either hold their phone very high above their heads, or very low. Framing your shot with your phone slightly higher than your eye line can be a good idea, to make you look a little thinner, (and show the goods!), but don't put it up completely or you will look like your head is 5 times bigger than the rest of your body. 

Low angles are honestly the devil. Even us as professionals use extreme precautions before considering it. The perspective will be distorted, you will have a double chin no matter what you do. Unless you are mastering the art of low angle, ditch it!

2) Is that your dirty laundry in the background?

I don't know about you, but every time I see a selfie, I am always checking the background. Because God knows I have seen hilarious things there: toilet, food, people (!!), your dog humping a cushion, you name it!

Be mindful of what is behind you, you can have the best body in the world, if there is even the slightest toilet paper roll in that bottom right corner, your beautiful work is ruined.

3) You're not a contortionist and it's okay

Keep your posing simple. No need to put your leg behind your head, wraps your arms in an uncomfortable position you would never do in reality. All you need is to straighten your back, ideally arch it just a bit to bring the girls up, roll your shoulders out and balance your weight on one hip. Boom done. Leave the more complex posing to us, we will guide you accordingly.

Bonus: it helps a lot to have a mirror facing you so you can see what's going on.

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4) The yellow bathroom lights are rarely a good idea

Prioritize natural light, always. Try to face a window as much as possible, avoid the harsh top lighting, it will create some shadows that will give you the ultimate raccoon look. Most of our artificial lighting has a yellow tone too, which is far from flattering.
Bonus: unless you have a super well lit bathroom, stay away from it (+ it will help with the background mistake we just talked about).

5) Watch out for wardrobe malfunctions!

Make sure everything is where you want it to be. The straps, the stockings, the panties, pasties, whatever you are wearing! There is nothing more frustrating than mastering your lighting, posing and angles and having your beautiful brasilian cut panties are waaaay too low (#unwantedbuttcrack)

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Practice and snap away!

Taking your own photos can be really fun, even if you just keep them to yourself! The more you practice, the more fun you will have.

We have also set up an entire online guide to teach you more in depth how you can take your own photos easily with your phone. Make sure to have a look below!

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How words can impact your mind and body

Language is a powerful tool which brings people together and help understand each other. But unfortunately it can also be used as a weapon when put between mischievous hands. Since it is easier for a lot of people to criticize rather than giving compliments, words can be extremely harmful.

By the way I, Fanny, am writing this blog. But I can also speak for Juliette as she also got hurt from people’s comments when she was younger!

 
woman wearing pink fur coat with pink hair posing in plants
 

Like most people I am lacking self-confidence from time to time. Not about my body, more about my skills and intellect (this will be for another blog though 😬). I feel very fortunate I was able to accept and love how my body looks like naturally, but it wasn't always the case! It took me many years to realize that all the beauty standards I grew up with were BS and how to reclaim my own beauty. Honestly photography helped a lot and I am really glad I chose that path!

I used to wish to be curvier, taller, have thicker wrists, have a perfect skin… I was wishing to be different not only because of what I was seeing in magazines or tv, but also because people around me were criticizing me about my body.

When your loved ones are not so loving

Juliette was criticized for being overweight, I was criticized for being skinny and short:

-“You look like a garden gnome hahaha!”

- “I should not talk about that in front of you! What are you, 14 or so?” (I was 22 😢)

- “Are you not ashamed of not having boobs?”

- “Are you sure you don't suffer from anorexia?”

… I could keep going on and on.

Most of those awful sentences came from friends or people I knew, and every time they broke me into thousand pieces. Until a classmate told me the worst one someone could ever say to me “your mom should be so ashamed for giving birth to an anorexic girl. What an embarrassment!”.

That sentence was a wake up call! Like Juliette, I had a “F**k that! Never again” moment and told myself that I will never let words put me down ever again.

Relax, it was just a joke!

That famous: “I was joking!”… I am pretty sure we can all relate right? And maybe we did it too without realizing we hurt someone. We don’t know if it was the same for you but Juliette and I grew up in France where sarcasm is very common. People from the same family and friends pocked each other, made jokes about the way they look or their personality, and ended up with a "you are so sensitive, it was just a joke!” if the person was hurt or taking it the wrong way. We were both victims of those comments that could be soul crushing.

And yes maybe it was just a “joke”, but for some reason that day those words sticked to your mind. Maybe it wasn’t the first time you heard those words or maybe you were already having a bad day and was feeling a down. When a loved one tells you several times how overweight they think you are or how an idiot you can look like, even if they say it with a touch of humour, you ended up believing those words and less in yourself.

When the critics come from yourself!

Raise your hand if you have ever called yourself stupid. Raise your hand if you have ever looked at your reflection in the mirror with a disgusted look on your face. Raise your hand if you have ever been unkind to yourself! Are you raising both hands right now and need a third one? Yep, me as well :(

Self-criticism is so common! It is very easy to be harsh with our body and our mind, yet the things we tell ourselves we would never tell that to someone else. So why this need of self-harm and sabotage?

What we want you to do from now on is to talk to yourself the same way you would talk to your best friend.

Start seeing your body as a friend who needs love instead of seeing it as an enemy. Kindness is not only meant to comfort others!

It is hard to detach ourselves from the negative things people can tell us or have told us in the past because it is painful. But the truth is that people have the tendency to project their own insecurities on you rather than dealing with their problems. So the next time someone criticize you, remember there is a big chance that person is just showing how they really think about themselves in a specific situation.

Once you get that, people’s hurtful words will not affect you anymore!

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We made it on CTV!

Let us tell you a powerful story. A story full of dreams, love, and connections, that started 6 years ago when we opened Scandaleuse. Opening our business in a new country and in a new language was already a success for us, but wanted more.

We wanted to create a safe space for our clients to be their most magnificent-self, and also create meaningful and long-lasting connections between our Scandals and us. We were dreaming of being interviewed at the radio, on newspaper, and even one day making an appearance on national tv to really spread the word about all the great benefits from doing a boudoir shoot.

 
Photographer posing woman wearing only a white gown on a yellow couch indoors
 

You can guess that those dreams don’t happened magically over night! We pushed ourselves out of our comfort zone so many times! Between going to tons of events and start conversations with strangers (if you are wondering how to network with someone without sounding too salesy, always start with an honest compliment on something they wear. This works every time 😉), making videos even though we felt so frustrated and uncomfortable talking in front of a camera, or all the new things we had to learn… We worked hard to meet people, create useful content, and build our brand! Not that we are done achieving everything on our list, but so far all of this hard worked payed off: we build a beautiful community and great reputation, we can pay ourselves a good salary, and we have the freedom to create.

We don’t just believe in ourselves

There is also something important to know about Juliette and I, we both are spiritual. We believe that everything happens for a reason and always try to manifest the things we want. Why are we mentioning that? Well, do you remember those interviews we mentioned previously? Every time we wrote down in our journals that we wanted to be interviewed, it happened!

The only one that was hard to manifest was the national TV appearance 😬. We were dreaming of it for a long time but it is possible that, deep down, we thought it was just a dream. Until it happens… We finally made it on TV 🎉

And you know, it is probably for the best it took 6 years to happen because even if it was a fabulous experience it was also nerve-wracking! The idea of speaking in another language live on national TV, made us feel really nervous. If there is something we learnt in our spiritual journey is that things don’t happen if you are not ready for them.

 
Two women posing nude indoor in a see-through gown under fake clouds
 

It was meant to be

During Covid we did a bunch of shoots in order to raise money to save one of our loft. This is when we met Aakriti (she did one of the shoots) who is a segment producer for the live show called The Social on CTV. She also posed for us last year for an exhibit we did against domestic abuse. She really loved those two boudoir experience that she decided to pitch the topic to the channel and they accepted! We are so grateful for her ❤️

On our side we were able to talk to her about Michelle Osbourne who is a body activist and a past client, as they wanted to have another speaker during the show. What a pleasure it was to share another amazing conversation with Michelle!

We were also very pleased to have Cai and Hallae with us during the shoot so they could have the opportunity to talk about their experience and how boudoir photography impacted their life!

Cherry on top of the cake, we did not know that one of our friend, Marny (that we met during a mastermind) would be the audience coordinator that day, and Jam Gamble (another past client) will be there as well.

Everything came in full circle!

What was it all about?

The concept was for the channel to follow us on a shoot to see the all process of a boudoir shoot, from the prepping of the client to the selection of the final photographs, with the shoot in between. And have some interviews from two past clients as well as Sarah who was our client for the day:

 
 

Then a few weeks later we were invited for one of The Social show’s segment to talk more about sensuality and empowerment for women:

 
 

You cannot see it in the video but we were all nervous when we sat down. Then we started to talk with the hosts and everything became so natural. The energy in the room was so positive, and the public was really receptive. It really helped us to feel at ease! We hope to be able to do it again in the future.

Doing some public speaking to give our opinion about sensuality and body empowerment is part of our mission. The more we can talk about how boudoir photography is an amazing way to reconnect with your body and how therapeutic it can be for a lot of people, the happiest we feel!

 
 

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Taking intimate photos doesn't make you a “whore”

On the 2022 list of "things we don't tolerate anymore, whatever the excuse is”, slut shaming is in the top 3!

We have heard too many times from people in our community, that some people in their life believe it is inappropriate for a woman to do a boudoir shoot. For example, one of our lovely Scandal messaged us saying how one of her close friends decided to stop talking to her after seeing her boudoir photos online. Long story short, her "oh so scandalous photos" made her look like she was an attention seeker and could not be trusted, especially around said-friend's husband. Mind-blowing, isn't it?

We have a universal truth for you: taking photos of yourself in a sensual setting showing partial, suggested or full nudity, does NOT make you a whore. It makes you a freaking goddess. And it might surprise you, but it has nothing to do with any physical aspects.

 
boudoir shoot of woman wearing only white sure seating behind plants looking at camera
 

There are 3 types of people:

  1. Those who are in the process of conquering their fear of something, anything, by stepping out of their comfort zone. They seek Happiness with a capital H and believe it resides in continuous learning and positive challenges in life.

    They know the recipe but haven't started putting the ingredient together yet.

  2. Those who are a few steps ahead with a few life experiences under their belts, thus have already learnt to develop a "no fucks given" mentality and celebrate the fact that they can be who they really are.

    They have built solid foundations of confidence and it shows in everything they touch.

  3. Last but not least: those who don't dare thinking outside the box and, quite frankly, are pretty scared to explore what's happening on the other side of the white pickets fences of "proper" beliefs they -or their environment- have built for them.

Guess which persona usually reaches out to us? #1 & #2. Why? Because they understand that boudoir photography is far from being just pretty photos. It is a set of tools given to you to start or finish the process of embracing yourself.

Gain some experience points and level up

Asian woman with long black hair kneeing on brown leather couch nude but covered with kimono

By embracing yourself, you are taking the chance to live your life to the fullest, according to your needs.

Here is the super important part: by learning to do this, you are demolishing negative beliefs, you become much better at facing obstacles, you are significantly decreasing any source of anxiety and you trust your guts. You know what you need and are not afraid to do what it takes to make it happen. In other words: you know your worth!

Suddenly, the path to your dream job doesn't seem out of reach anymore. Or you know you can work your ass off to build the home of your dreams.

You will also attract relationships who will respect, appreciate and lift you up. Bonus: you will know how to do the same to others because you can acknowledge other people's worth too.

Think of it as a major level up. We like to think with each skills acquired in life, we have little "xp" points popping up above our heads like in video games. The higher you go, the more tools you unlock to keep leveling up.

So what if you use boudoir photos as a part of your ongoing growth?

There is something to learn in every experiences you go through. We know that and you know it too.

A boudoir experience is just a tool given to you to level up. Grab it, enjoy it a 100%, and take everything you can out of it. For yourself but also others. Because once you do get on the other side of basic beliefs, you will reach your hand out to bring others in too.

That's how strong teams are created and changes are made.

If you have that deep desire to try a boudoir shoot but you don't feel ready to take the first step yet; we created this detailed online boudoir program. It is the perfect opportunity to get a first taste of boudoir photography at home, with just you and your beautiful self.

 
boudoir shoot of curvy woman with pink hair laying down on bed closing her eyes hands on her chest
 

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Boudoir over 40: why you should definitely do it.

Boudoir photography comes with an endless list of benefits that absolutely everyone can enjoy. We can also say that boudoir sparks a lot of interest in everyone, no matter your age, who you identify with, and if you like cilantro or not. Yet, a fear keeps crippling in the back of many people over 40 and it always comes out as a ”I am way too old to do for this".

Obviously no, you’re not and here is why you should consider it big time…

 
 

So, what is really behind the ”I am too old to do this”?

After asking our surrounding, this is what came out: being potentially judged by other people is scary as hell.

Just risking having someone say you look ”ugly” or ”ridiculous” is too much to handle.

And we don't blame you! Bodies change over years. Wrinkles show up, for some, babies have happened, provoking even stronger changes… Your body has become a map of memories and society has told us all that it looks bad and/or that it is not good enough. Fun.

None of the beauty standards are accurate.

breaking free from them is the best gift you can give yourself.

Everyone gets older, you are not doing anything wrong by doing it too. You’ve been putting in the work for yourself, for your body. It has been serving you for many years and it deserves to be embraced, celebrated, welcomed. YOU deserve to feel celebrated.

Following those unattainable standards creates limitations for you and you end up passing on experiences you may not only enjoy but could also contribute greatly to your happiness.

All of this because a random bunch of people decided that you shouldn't, for no good reason whatsoever. We are not gonna let those win now, are we?

 
 

Learning to appreciate your appearance also comes with the strongest perk of all: a rock solide self-confidence which leads to stop giving a rat’s ass about what other people think of you.

With this tool on your belt, you can finally do things for you, in your own terms. Now, that's happiness!

So what can you do in order to get to that sweet spot of self-acceptance?

• Understand that judgment is not about you.

It is about people projecting their own insecurities and fears on you.

We think about ourselves a lot, even when someone tells us a story that has nothing to do with us. For example, if you are mentioning something you'd like to do and the person you are talking to secretly wants to as well but doesn’t have the guts to do it: chances are they will try to dissuade you. They’re not talking about you, you are just mirroring something in them. Now that you know that, it is so much easier to detach from the judgement and not let it influence your decisions.

• Ditch the dummies.

If you get negative feedback on anything you do, you are not the problem. The people giving you the feedback are. And if this is a recurring problem, it sounds like you are not getting anything interesting from those people, the best thing to do is limit or end the relationship with them. You don’t need demeaning people in your life.

• Give yourself permission.

Now that you've ditched the impact of judgement, you have to allow yourself to do things. It sounds simple, but many of us don't.

Remind yourself that the best adventures are waiting for you outside of your comfort zone.

Even if it is just that colourful dress which caught your eye in the window that you would love to wear. There are absolutely NO GOOD REASONS not to wear something that could make you happy.  Don’t even try to justify it, just try to the goddamn dress instead. And don’t you dare dumping it at the bottom of your closet.

Boudoir gives you the chance to try a liberating experience, just for you.

It resets the image you have of yourself on the positive. You get an objective look, which is 100% of the time much better than what we believe - and gives you such a boost of confidence you will be craving for more.

All of this while… giving a great middle finger to expectations. That's always a nice way to satisfy our rebellious side!

Over half of our clients are actually over 40. And that includes women, but also men. You may not see it because many of them ask to keep their pictures private, but they are definitely here. So you are definitely not the only one tempted by the wonderful world of boudoir!

You 👏🏻 are 👏🏻 enough.
How about to start enjoying your life the way YOU want to? Some many beautiful moments await!

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6 unusual inquiries we got for boudoir photography

Once upon a time, two boudoir photographers were having tasty breakfast together. And like most of new entrepreneurs, they decided to open their emails to check on new inquiries like they did every morning. That day they got a new one and happily started to read it, but their joy faded away when they saw the email attachment: a dick pic… They never opened their emails in the morning ever again 😂

 
two women drinking coffee in a vintage coffee shop and laughing
 

We receive a lot of badass and emotional emails, but from time to time creepy and unusual requests are popping up. Some are hilarious, others are disturbing

Scandals, here is our top 6 of the weirdest inquiries we got since we opened Scandaleuse Photography:

N°6 : The dick pic guy

If there is something intriguing with Boudoir and men, is that most of the gentlemen who contact us for a boudoir shoot want to do something more sexual. Which is not a problem! Even if we do not shoot this type of photography we understand everyone has their own fantasies and there is nothing wrong with that. But what is the most disturbing for us is that some men believe we need to see their pee-pee before accepting to work with them. And it usually goes like this:

- Them: “I wanna shoot with you, do you need to see what I look like?”

- Us: “No need to! We do not chose our clients based on their look or body type.”

- Them: sending the picture of big Willy and the twins (with the worst angle and lighting) even thought we said no 😤 But if you really want to show us your joystick, at least do it in an artistic way!

Joke aside, here is a gentle reminder to anyone who want to send us pictures of their genital: just don’t, we really don’t need to see what you look like down there!

It was very tempting to add a moustache and a hat on this photograph and send it back to that particular client. Should we do it next time?

 
 

N°5 : The iPad guy

This made us laugh!

We received a long time ago an email from a guy who wanted to shoot one of his sexual fantasy with us, we don’t remember exactly what it was about. With his inquiry he attached a script of all the scenarios he had in mind, scene by scene with details of what we had to shoot (was it badly written on top of being weird? Absolutely!).

But wait, the best part was that he requested that we shoot only with is iPad. Go figure!

N°4 : The pink blouse guy

One day we were contacted by a man who wanted to do a boudoir shoot for his future husband. His idea was to lay down on a bed made of Kleenex - once again everyone has a fantasy. He was also looking for a wedding photographer but didn't want to tell us the date of the wedding - RED FLAG. The icing on the cake was when he asked us to wear pink blouses for the first meeting, because (and we quote) "the first impression is very important".

Sure! Do you want us to wear a french maid outfit so we can clean your discourtesy off your face? 

We nicely told him we would not do it, so he decided to go with another photographer and apparently found one… Good for him!

N° 3 : The "I like humiliation" guy

This one was probably the most recent one. We received an email from a guy who lost a bet and had to do a boudoir shoot, wearing high heels, sexy dress, lingerie and/or be nude. He had to walk like a model and be shoot in some very embarrassing poses, for his humiliation and women amusement.

We obviously declined, told him boudoir photography is an art, and that we work only with people who respect this type of photography.

But we added we could provide some headshots for professional purpose if he was interested. You have to see business opportunity everywhere right?!

 
two women opening an email they did not want to see
 

N° 2 : The "you need to wear sexy clothes so I can feel turned on" guy

Ooooh man, this was our first weird inquiry. This married man sent us an email because he was looking to do a couple boudoir shoot with his wife. They have been married for 20 years and they were looking to spice up their relationship. We were pretty happy about it since, at that time, we didn't get a lot of couples interested by a boudoir shoot. So he started to explain what he wanted, sent us example of videos and pictures (remember the dick pic story previously, well those were the beginning). His wife had apparently a big and sexual appetite and they were looking for erotic photography. We explained to him this is not the type of service we offer but we could give them sensual pictures without crossing our boundaries.

We were not against working with them, they wanted to celebrate the love they have for each other by trying a new experience.

Unfortunately he crossed the line when he asked us to dress up very sexy during the shoot so he can be more excited. We were happy to not go forward with this inquiry: this couple were the lions, we were the gazelles. 

N° 1: The "let's redo American Pie" guy

And the winner is... (actually my little favourite, probably because I watch all of the American Pie movies)
A man who loved his mom decided to treat her with a boudoir shoot and reach out to us. What a sweet and thoughtful gentleman who was open minded enough to offer this beautiful experience as a gift for his mom. Or so we thought.

We were pretty intrigued so we replied to him asking for more details. Maybe his mom asked him to book the shoot for her, maybe it was a gift for his parents' wedding anniversary, or maybe his mom had self-confidence issues and he wanted to let her out.

We were so wrong, it was not a thoughtful idea but a pretty crazy one:

He wanted some pictures taken of his mom and his best-friend like the scene in the first “American Pie” when Paul Finch is having sex on the pool table with Stifler’s mom. The story never said if it was a spam or a serious request. 

Yes we are photographers whose main goal is to highlight the beauty and sensuality of every bodies, but it doesn't mean we get sexual pleasure out of it. So keep your pants on (at least until the day of the shoot)! We are not part of your fantasy, don't plan to be, and will never ever touch your purple-helmeted warrior of love.  

 
 

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I do whatever I want with my butt, thank you.

A few weeks ago, I received a comment on one of my pole-dancing Instagram stories with a very thoughtful question:

“Why are you doing this? The way you have to show your butt to everyone… What is the point? I just don’t get it.”

Did someone call Judgment to the table? Many of us have a hard time starting facing judgement, especially when we want to start something new.. It is very easy for people to share their 2 cents on how you should live your life. While there is nothing much you can do about their behaviour, you can choose to handle the situation to your advantage.

Detach, to not waste your time.

 
 

So here I was, in my underwear, upside down on the pole, practicing a move, minding my own business. Then this message popped up and I started to wonder:

  • Why am I upside down on a pole?

  • Why am I half naked in my apartment?

  • Why do I share those online?

And so on until my mind was filled with enough random thoughts about my actions to the point that they made me question my entire being.

Hold on a minute here.

This simple message had me doubting myself and my choices? It made me think twice about sharing something that I actually love and that doesn’t hurt anyone?

Hell no.

I realized I had three options. I could:

- Let my anger out and tackled him with my words (tempting!);
- Spend my time starting a debate on how we live in a society where it is inappropriate for women to show their bodies but normal for men and how it is important to change mentality around that topic, or;
- Ignore his remark and keep my cool.

I went for the 3rd option.

Why? Because what this guy wanted was to criticize, not try to really understand and potentially change his way of thinking and beliefs. Getting into a debate to attempt to educate him was very tempting but I just knew it would have just left me feeling frustrated as hell. So I kept my cool, told him I would not go into details and wished him a good night.

 
 

Sometimes, You can absolutely have conversations with people, only if they come from a neutral and curious state of mind. If someone starts saying something with an undertone of judgement, you will not make them change their minds.

So don’t waste your time, and keep doing whatever makes you feel good, especially because…

It’s not about you anyway.

There will always be someone ready to negatively judge whatever you're doing. And the truth is: it has nothing to do with you.

Behind someone’s judgment is an insecurity of theirs shining through.

And they are projecting it on you. You poked at something that is uncomfortable to them. It reminds them of that one thing they wish they could work on but haven’t yet for whatever reason. Is it fair? Nope. Do we all do it? Yes.

Being aware of it gives you the chance to act differently in those situations. It makes it easier to let go of the negativity you are facing and even bring compassion to the table by asking this person what is really going on. (If you feel like it, of course. Again, pick your battles!)

No, detaching doesn’t make you selfish.

A lot of people, especially women, feel incredibly guilty not to listen when someone is giving them “advice” disguised in judgement. That's conditioning for you, the “be a good girl” kind of thing. If this is your case, here is a little reminder that can help: nobody knows your life better than yourself, therefore, the only person who can make decisions about it is… you. It doesn't mean you have to send everyone packing and that you don't care. But it means you don't have to accept everything coming your way.

It does not make you selfish or pretentious if you decide to not give a damn. You know you cannot please everyone.

You want to wear only blue clothes, go for it. You don't want kids, nothing wrong with that. You want to work in the sex industry, you do you my friend (no pun intended - or maybe a little!).

Don't let others dictate who you are just because they believe it is the only and right way to be. What you do with your butt, how you dress, the way you live your life and who you decide to be are your decisions to make.

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What I wish I heard when I hated my body.

Growing up, like many young souls, I wasn't the biggest fan of my appearance. It took me a long time to learn the tools I needed to start respecting and loving my body the way I do now. Looking back, some tools could have been unlocked fairly easily, by one simple sentence and it probably would have saved me years of figuring it out on my own. Hopefully, I get to be your messenger today and deliver them to you.

 
 

1) The way you see your body is rarely the way it actually is.

Clouded vision of our bodies ( and even body-dysmorphia) is the number one obstacle in our body love journey. Due to many factors, such as comparing ourselves or unwelcome criticism, it is very easy to paint a negative image of our appearance, even unconsciously.

For example, in my case, I used to see myself much bigger than how I actually was and I only realized that by looking at old pictures years later. I created so much pressure and shame around my weight, every single day. All I remember, the rare time I brought it up, was hearing the exasperated “ugh what are you talking about?” .

Truth is, I wasn't capable of seeing any differently. This vision was buried so deep, I just didn’t know It could be wrong.

I like to think that hearing the following would have pushed me in the right direction, taught me to develop kindness towards myself and give myself a break. You can try it if someone you care about is bringing up something like this to you:

“Hey, this is very common for people to think this way. You don’t see it right now, your vision is influenced by many things outside of your control. Just be kind to yourself.“

2) Your body changes pretty much every day, and that's normal.

There are so many things happening in your body at once, every day, that can affect your appearance from one day to the next. Digestion, hormonal changes, periods, stress… Everything fluctuates all day, every day.

For example, no one has a flat stomach all day everyday. No one. Not even Britney Spears from 2004.

Knowing this would have helped alleviate the pressure I created around looking a certain way all the time and helped me develop self-acceptance.

3) The size tag on clothes doesn't mean anything, dont let it define you and be a way to celebrate or denigrate your body.

When I was shopping for clothes and did not fit in the size I wanted, it was crushing me for the whole day. I was embarrassed. After all, my girlfriends told me they were wearing this size and I wasn't.

I have had so many moments tearing up in a fitting room because I had to go a size up of what I was hoping for.

If only I had been told that sizing for clothes are not reliable truths and change so much from one brand to the other! I had to learn to detach myself from those tags and use them only as a very rough reference. I still have to remind myself this to this day. 

4) Weight scales are BS.

Since our bodies are constantly changing, it is normal that our weight does too. Just like the size tag, I was always aiming for a certain weight, often based around what my friends said (while completely disregarding their body shape may I add) and I felt like crap when I was way over that.

The day I finally understood that once again, so many factors can influence your weight, making it a not-so reliable source too, I ditched the scale.

A number doesn’t define me. I haven’t weighted myself in years, I don't even know how much I weigh, and I am much happier that way. 

 
 

5) The media is not the reality.

I grew up in the time with Christina Aguilera and other 2000 super stars blasted everywhere with the tiniest bodies on earth in low rise jeans. It made me obsessed about my little tummy pouch. Why did I have one and they didn’t?

And it wasn’t just them, everywhere I looked, it was the same type of body, from magazine to TP commercials.

I wish someone had told me it wasn’t the reality. That editing was involved, that the majority of women don’t look like that, come in all shape and sizes, and that not one is better than the other. That everyone has their little imperfections and again, that they are normal. 

6) The more you take good care of your body, the better your mind will be.

For some, it is common sense, for others, it is rocket science:

the appreciation you have for your body greatly affects your mental health and vice versa.

The happier you feel about your body, the more your mind follows. They don’t go without one another.

In my early twenties, I started learning a lot about personal development and the connection to the body is still not mentioned often. (One of the many reasons why Scandaleuse exists to begin with!). The truth is, you can lead a much happier life when you connect the dots between your mind and your body.

7) You're not alone.

Oh boy, does it sound simple, but knowing that I wasn't the only one feeling insecure as hell would have made such a difference! I do believe that bringing normalcy to the table when dealing with body insecurities and self-doubt is so helpful to stop giving it that much importance.

It is so easy to feed toxic patterns without realizing it. Creating acceptance around them make them less threatening and easier to let them go.

Be kind and patient with yourself, even in your darkest days.

When in doubt, Talk it out, Write it down and more importantly, remember to give yourself a break.

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Sensuality 101

Let's get liberated today!

Sensuality can be a scary topic for some people as it is common to believe it is only related to sex, and usually used as a weapon for seduction. Even if both are connected (when you learn to develop your sensuality, you learn to be in touch with your body the way it is, which opens up your sexuality), sensuality is also so much more than sex.

It is the ability to feel deeply connected to all our senses, and experience life in a more beautiful and energetic way.

 
artistic black and white pictures of two nude women surrounded by plants in front of white background
 

It is time to demystify sensuality

If you Google it, you will read the common definition of sensuality is:

The enjoyment, expression, or pursuit of physical, especially sexual, pleasure.

But sensuality is also defined as the ability to feel in touch with our touch, smell, sight, hearing, taste and any extrasensory perceptions beyond our five commonly recognized senses.

If sensuality is often interpreted as sexuality, it is because of that one thing they have in common. PLEASURE. What can be more difficult to understand is this notion of pleasure: some things can give you sexual pleasure and others can be pleasurable without sexual desire.

Sensuality can increase your sexual behaviour but can also be about enjoying simple pleasures, such as watching a sunset, flavourful food, a massage, a perfume or any particular smell, a yoga pose, feeling the sun on your skin… Anything that makes you feel great in the moment but isn't related to sex.

You gotta embrace it!

As women we heard it all:

“Be polite. Dress up properly. Be a good girl!".

Most of us have been told to never be too loud because people will think we are hysterical. We have been told to not take too much room otherwise we are just showing off. Neither to show too much skin because we are whores if we do. So we cover ourselves up, forget how to be in touch with our femininity and let our true essence disappears. And for what? Because we feel like we have to please others all the time, and are afraid of people's judgment.

Not loving our whole-self enough leads to frustration, jealousy and sadness. How can we expect to be happy and live the life we want, when we are filled with all those negative feelings?

Learning to embrace sensuality (btw, we are all sensual beings!) is a way to start feeling in harmony with our body, which increases our self-confidence and trust in others. And since sensuality is connected to all of our senses, it also develops our creativity, imagination and intuition. Not that bad hey!

Indian woman wearing black lingerie and red shirt standing in front of window with curtains flying around

Sensuality = Femininity

It doesn't matter what we identify to, we all have a feminine and masculine side. Sensuality is a powerful tool to dig deeper into your feminine energy. If you feel like you are more in touch with your masculinity, exploring your sensuality will help you understand and bring back more of your feminine side into your life.

It is very easy to do! You will read below that there are many ways to embrace your sensuality, all you need is to keep an open mind about experiencing life.

Different ways to explore sensuality

When at peace with your whole-self, you are less likely to feel stressed in your every day life. You also don't feel the need of external validation: what people can think of you does not matter anymore. It creates a new level of self-love and confidence.

As said before, there many possibilities to experience sensuality:

  • Movement:

    Can be some yoga, stretching, dance, a walk in nature,… Moving your body every day is amazing for so many aspects of your life, one of them being sensuality. When you move, you have to be aware of every inches of your body. Every muscles, and nerfs get activated, which makes you feel more in touch with yourself. It also allows you put all your energy around your hips which makes you feel so powerful and sexy.

  • Food:

    Big foodies here! We are both from France, so let us tell you that you how much food means to us. France has a fabulous culinary reputation and it is for a reason: french cuisine is all about flavours and smells, forget about salt and sugar, we are talking about explosion of aromas. We learnt to educate our palate, so when we try exquisite food, it can feel like non-sexual orgasms.

  • Clothing:

    Every shapes, colours, and textures you choose to wear can tell a lot about who you are, and what you enjoy in life. Clothes are a powerful tool for confidence and sensuality, it is like wearing a second skin. When you were pieces that make you feel good about your body, or the way you look, you unlock your emotions and allow yourself to be who you want to be.

  • Nature:

    Our world is a beautiful place and need to be cherished. Next time you go outside, be aware of everything around you: the sounds, colours, shades of lighting, movement created by the wind, smells, feel the sun on your skin… Feel the energy of Life. How does it make you feel?

  • Boudoir photography:

    Can you think of a more powerful way to develop your sensuality than boudoir photography? Having (pardon our french) the balls or vulva to show vulnerability by posing half naked in front of two strangers (AKA us), and still feel badass and empowered, is pretty impressive!

Now you just have to go for it!

“I never thought that sex was wrong, sinful, dirty. When you take away the thought of things being dirty or forbidden, then you can really enjoy your sensuality.” Gioconda Belli

Sensuality as a way to experience a deep peace within yourself, to feel alive and fulfill. When you embrace it, it makes you feel like you can do anything.

The world become your oyster.

And guess what?! When you feel like you can do anything, you actually start doing stuff that make you happy and 100% yourself. It is like a magical kick in the bum!

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