Hello fellow reader, Juliette here, co-founder of Scandaleuse Photography. I have now been a photographer for over 15 years, and my work has always been around making every-day women feel beautiful. I am indeed a fervent believer that everybody should feel great about themselves. But I can't pretend this mission was totally self-less: looking back, I can say with confidence that I put myself on this journey because I just didn't feel good in my own skin so helping others do it was a way to help myself.
And it's worked. A lot. But the past few months, I felt like I needed a reminder so for the first time in 7 years, I ask Fanny, my co-founder, to give me what we give to our wonderful client: a boudoir shoot.
Now, if you have been around Scandaleuse, you could say “dude, we see you all the time in a boudoir setting” and you would be right. However, when we opened, Fanny and I took the decision to model for our work to have the freedom to use the photos the way we want. Those shoots are "work-related", productive, with a specific goal and… I am not posing alone.
Posing with somebody is easier in my opinion. The focus is on you as a group, not solo. It takes off the pressure. Doing a photoshoot for yourself is a whole different feeling that I hadn't experienced in years. And I needed it.
The need to reconnect as a woman.
I haven't been shy to share about my experience with body-dysmorphia since a very young age, to the point where I was heavily editing my photos the minute I dabbled with Photoshop.
Body-dysmorphia will always be a part of my life, but I am proud to say that, at 32 years old, I have done enough work on myself to shut it down fairly easily.
This need for a photoshoot wasn't because something felt off with my body. It was because I needed to reconnect with myself as a feminine being.
The "go-go-go mode”
It's safe to assume that I am leaning towards a "type A” personality. I respond a lot to achievements, I'm impatient, always rushing and executing something. While it comes with wonderful perks like creativity and ambition, it also comes with a lot of burn-out, frustration and masculine energy.
To sum it up easily, masculine energy is all about doing while feminine energy is all about being, itself tied with sensuality.
And what's the link with my request to do a boudoir shoot? Well, if there is one experience in which you can just exist, let go and let your sensuality shine, it's a boudoir shoot.
So, how did it feel to step in front of the camera?
Don't let the fact that I am a professional boudoir photographer fool you: it was challenging for me too! Maybe even more so, because I am deeply familiar with posing and what looks good and what doesn't. Pressure on!
But part of my reasoning going into this as also to let myself be guided. (And that's a scary feeling for me!). The whole point of doing this was to stop controlling everything, I would have felt like garbage about myself if I put on my professional hat and took over! So I let go, trusted my partner and focused on feeling good.
I had also forgotten how exhilarating boudoir is! We always talk about it but feeling it again was such a strong reminder of why we do what we do.
And Just like anybody else, I felt like a sexy & badass freaking goddess. Exactly what I was looking for, and I am craving for more!
It is easy to forget how good and necessary this feeling is, even when you literally work in this field.
Even though, for many, it is perceived as completely superficial and narcissistic, we all need to feel strong and beautiful. It makes you a better human towards others but you also are in a much better state of mind to take care of yourself properly. Re-doing this experience fired me up on many levels, just as I was expecting, and now I also get a bunch of cool visuals to go with it!
What about you, would you do (or re-do) a boudoir shoot? Make sure to consider us if you do ;)