Let's talk about consent!

Guest post by Eden Wine - Mindset Consultant

 With the advent of the “Me Too” and “Times Up” era, we must learn the nuances of “Consent” so we can best equip ourselves to effectively navigate our relationships.

 
 

It’s time to create a clear definition of what consent means to us, and it’s important to:

  • understand our rights when it comes to giving and receiving consent;

  • solidify our true introspective understanding of our personal boundaries; and

  • learn about and respect how to best support other people’s boundaries. 

HOW MANY OF YOU HAVE ALLOWED YOUR BOUNDARIES TO BE CROSSED FOR THE PURPOSE OF PLEASing OTHERS OR IN THE ATTEMPT OF “FEELING BEAUTIFUL”? WELL I HAVE.

When I was 14, I suddenly became well endowed in the derriere department. Now, given the location of this development, I was completely unaware of its existence. I only came to know about my “ass-et” because of my male peers. When walking down the hallway of my high school, adorned in a school uniform, I was consistently greeted by unsolicited slaps, grabs, and fondles. I wasn’t even able to acknowledge this new part of my body before it was claimed by others and objectified. Since this was one of the first experiences I had in my developing body, I was trained to think that this behaviour was acceptable.

As a young teen, I was quickly learning that it was okay for me to be caressed without consent. This, however, is not true.

We, as humans, have exclusive rights to our own bodies.

It is our fundamental obligation to define boundaries for ourselves and to feel comfortable and assured when voicing such boundaries. We are not owned by anyone and no one is entitled to us or any part of us. In fact, the right we have to our own bodies is grounded in and protected by law.

HOW ARE OUR RIGHTS PROTECTED?

The Constitutions and Criminal Codes of many (if not most) developed countries have specific and designated laws that are geared towards protecting the sanctity of consent. Now, I’m no expert in the laws of the world at large, but I know Canada very carefully preserves the notion of consent into its legislation and case law. For example, section 273.1(1) of the Canadian Criminal Code dictates that sexual activity is ONLY legal when both parties consent and where “voluntary agreement” is obtained. Both parties means BOTH parties. In fact, the “two to tango” phraseology has never been more apropos. Sure, there will be nuances in courting and dating when flirting plays a role though subliminal and subtle body language, but that does not dismiss the importance of ensuring that BOTH parties are consenting and, even more than that, consenting the WHOLE time. 

LET’S THINK ABOUT AND DEFINE OUR BOUNDARIES AND RESPECT OTHER PEOPLE’S BOUNDARIES TOO! #PlatinumRule 

Consent is truly grounding yourself in your beliefs and saying “yes” when an activity  (any activity really) feels right without a shadow of a doubt. This could apply to any sexual encounter or even as something as simple as a hug.

For all people alike, the onus is on us to:

  • know and learn our boundaries;

  • feel secure and confident in our ability to voice our boundaries; and,

  • to inquire and respect other people’s boundaries. In the end, it is each of us who have exclusive rights to our own person and it is our obligation to protect such rights with the entirety of our being.

DISCLAIMER

Eden Wine is presently a non-practicing lawyer. She was called to the Ontario Bar in June 2018 and has since been a member of the Law Society of Ontario.

The content of this article is provided for general information purposes only and does not constitute legal or other professional advice or an opinion of any kind. Readers of this article are advised to seek specific legal advice by contacting independent legal counsel regarding any specific legal issues. Neither the author, nor Scandaleuse Photography warrant or guarantee the quality, accuracy or completeness of any information in this article or on Scandaleuse Photography’s website. The content of this article is current as of the original date of publication, and should not be relied upon as accurate, timely, or fit for any particular purpose.

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Breast Massage For Sexual Healing And Getting Your Libido Back

The following is a guest post by Katrin, from katrinwithlove.com and @vaginismus.sisters.

If life has inconveniently initiated you in any sort of sexual liberation journey, then we have a lot in common.

I personally experienced painful sex and the protective body response of vaginismus (rhymes with Christmas) – a bracing and tightening of my pelvic floor muscles that robbed me of pleasure-filled gifts for more than 6 years…

 
 

Whether your story was ridden in pain, shame, numbness or anywhere in between, you've probably read plenty about the vulva and vagina in the process of claiming your sexual freedom.

It’s true. The ancient sex wisdom of Taoism confirms the intricate connection between the genitals and optimal functions of other organs and glands in the body. Creating harmony in these sacred areas of your body really is important in relieving tension and support physical and emotional healing.

But what about the breasts?

What purpose do they serve in your complete body system for physical and emotional healing?

What role do they serve in increasing your libido if that's something that has subsided for one reason or another?

Many of us have grown up ashamed of our breasts. They may have been the reason we received unwanted and uncomfortable attention.. Or we may have regarded them as just a necessary part of our female anatomy (but nothing more than that).

I personally grew up having a fairly BLAH relationship with my breasts.

They were there and that's about it - if anything, I had a perception of what beautiful breasts should look like, and mine weren't quite them. So it's safe to say my relationship with my lady bumps was MEH at worst and "ooh they look great in a push up bra" at best!

Starting to pay loving attention to YOUR breasts is a crucial part of getting your libido back and finding success in your sexual liberation journey.

Emotionally and energetically, when you find unconditional love for your heart space and breasts, you can tap into that sense of self-love and inner confidence that may have been energetically laying dormant under your layers of shame and indifference.

Even still, a vulva owner's sexual turn on STARTS in the heart centre represented by the breasts, gets strengthened by the cooperation of the mind and only then is felt physically in the genitals.

So it becomes important to bring your heart-centred turn-on online!

How do you involve your beautiful breasts in a holistic approach to healing?

 
 

Physically, that looks like stimulating them gently through breast massage to enhance the health of your heart, blood, lymphatic and hormonal systems.

Awakening the life force of the body as a whole to create sexual aliveness and sex drive.

The Tao of Sexology - The Book of Infinite Wisdom by Dr. Stephen T. Chang confirms that:

"From foreplay to pregnancy to nursing, the breasts are closely tied to the genital system, through nervous impulses, hormones, etc.”

"The delicate intertwining of numerous capillaries, nerves, lactation glands, lymphatic vessels, and other delicate structures of the breast are easily damaged by improper handling.”

Any damage to breast tissue can lead to accumulations and blockages.

These can then lead to lumps or, possibly, cancer. (The breast is so delicate that caffeine can cause lumps and cysts to form inside the breast, as was shown in recent studies.) If this should ever happen, the entire female reproductive system would be torn out of balance.

Therefore, the sensitive and easily over-stimulated breasts must never be mishandled by the woman or her sexual partner. A woman's partner should never bite, suck, or pinch the breast. Contact should be limited to a very gentle caress or kiss.

Even though more intense handling of the breasts can be very pleasurable for certain people, Taoism states that, for optimal full body functionality, and especially reversing the damage that may have already been created in the breasts, a gentle approach is required...

Here is a simple and gentle breast massage ritual that you can engage in to create a loving relationship with your breasts...

…And to enjoy all the physical benefits that come with it!

 
 
  1. Ensure your space is free of distractions and feels safe so you can fully surrender and relax.

  2. Make your room nice and cozy in whichever way feels right to you and lie down comfortably with your shirt off.

  3. Warm up your hands by rubbing them together to promote blood flow and circulation. Have some massage oil nearby if you'd like, but don't use it just yet.

  4. Place your hands on your chest, fall into a comfortable rhythm breathing into your belly. With a loving intention, connect to your heart as your listen to your heartbeat.

  5. With your fingertips or nails, slowly and delicately start moving up and down your breasts, avoiding the nipples. This stimulates sensation on and beneath the skin, essentially waking them up.

  6. Now put some massage oil on your hands if you'd like.

  7. Press down on your armpit and release 5 times. This helps open and generate healthy flow in the lymphatic system.

  8. As you keep breathing and with one hand per breast, continue more thoroughly massaging the perimeter of the breasts. Then move to the full breasts and only then the nipples. Make sure you are applying some more pressure now so you are stimulating the deeper breast tissue along with the skin.

  9. Using one or both hands, move back and forth between breasts, creating movement across the mid-meridians of your body. This helps balance both hemispheres of your brain and create union between your masculine and feminine energies.

  10. As you are lightly and intuitively continue touching your breasts, remind them that they are worthy of receiving love and pleasure.

  11. After about 15 minutes or when you feel complete, come into a relaxed position and be present with whatever feelings arise from doing this exercise. You did it!

What did you notice? Did any feelings of shame, discomfort, or even suppressed memories come up?

If so, that's totally normal. They may have been part of your life for many years. With each breast massage practice, you'll become closer to fully allowing yourself to release the discomfort and make space for unconditional love and acceptance. You may even realize...

May the love for your body in its entirety bring you peace and a conscious awareness that ALL of YOU is beautiful!

Helpful tools

You can perform your breast massage ritual with your hands, or you can also incorporate the use of tools like soft fabrics, feather toys or tools using the healing characteristics of some of Mother Earth’s natural elements – crystals.

If the crystal option piqued your interest, it’s encouraged that you pick a crystal intuitively simply by feeling which one you’re naturally drawn to most. Where each type of crystal has a unique energetic property and vibration and therefore a unique subtle impact on your own energy body.

The crystal I felt called to use in my breast massage practice was fire quartz.

 
 

I later learned that fire quartz calms anxieties and brings clarity. Like with rose quartz, its nature is that it subtly inspires self-acceptance feelings of greater calm and comfort.

In the journey of reconnecting to your authentic eroticism, this can be incredibly helpful in reconnecting to a state of mental peace with yourself and your body.

When I used the crystal in my breast massage practice, I really enjoyed its firmness and the smooth, rounded shape. It felt like an added luxury to the kind of touch I could create on my body.

And still, there is something special about using your own hands in varied forms of touch, as well as feeling that skin-to-skin contact and connection. To me, a combination of hands and tools provides that variety that I’ve learned I crave in life (in all sorts of ways).

In any case, the invitation is to introduce a breast massage practice into your self-care and self-pleasure practices in any ways that feels right to you!

Look for any subtle nudge that helps you feel the pleasure of sinking into a slow-paced and gentle experience, which of course can always naturally turn into a passionate and intense one..

Of course, the intention is that you feel that deep appreciation for a part of your body that you may have been disregarding for years.

Here’s to the love your breasts deserve!

- Katrin, with Love

 
 

The parts of you who desire a life based in liberation, love and leadership can find a home in Katrin’s world..

As a sexual liberation mentor who has overcome painful sex and continues to support women in releasing the protective body response of vaginismus, Katrin has a deep understanding of how survival strategies of the mind and subtle protective mechanisms of the body can sneakily keep you from feeling like the incredible woman you are!

Katrin believes that your power is born out of your deepest pain and that the Liberated & In Love Woman within you already has all the answers to guide you in your personal reclamation in the realms of sex, love, relationships and entrepreneurship.. She is here to love you as you re-discover your unique signature of play, pleasure and purpose. She gently calls you into your zone of genius and lifts you up as you bravely build your legacy from that place of aliveness and erotic overflow.

You can find her life’s work on her website katrinwithlove.com and on Instagram @katrin.with.love and @vaginismus.sisters

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Covid 19 - Our opinion about all of that madness

Between freaking out a little, bringing new ideas to life and reorganizing ourselves, we haven't really had the time to give you our opinion about the madness happening in our world right now. It is a scary situation that is going to change our entire economy and not knowing what to expect and when it will get better is probably the hardest part of it…

But we believe it will be for the best.

 
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When it all started

We are not gonna lie, when we realized we would not be able to offer boudoir shoots for a while, the idea of a potential quarantine was like a slap in the face. We were not stressed out because of the virus, neither the fear of loneliness but by the lack of income… It is crazy how money can make people jump from happiness to depression in a really short amount of time! We got sad, tired, cranky and filled with negative thoughts (I even had a panic attack on my balcony one night!).

It felt like all of those years building Scandaleuse Photography was gonna end up in the garbage, like this beautiful adventure was all for nothing. We understood then how Rick Grimes and his friends must have been feeling in their zombie apocalypse and how, like them, we will have to improve our survival skills in order to stay alive…

Yeah we agree, it's a bit too dramatic but this is how negativity can make you feel sometimes!

There is always sun above the clouds

We HAD to change our way of thinking, so we rented a car, packed our bags and went to nature for a couple of days to relax, strategize and refocus. This was what we needed, we even met a man who was very spiritual and who helped us to see things in a clearer way (he also cooked delicious breakfasts for us and we all know food is the perfect remedy against sadness).

When we came back to Toronto with a lighter mind and heart, it was easier to switch our mindset in a positive way: we brainstormed about new ideas for the business, how to make online income and reminded ourselves that we are young healthy people with a roof over our heads, so it could have been a lot worse!

Call us naive or utopian if you want, but we also decided to believe this situation is a actually a blessing in disguise.

Our world is changing

Humans are smart.

All of us are! We are a resourceful specie who can adapt to any situation and we are lucky to be living in a time where technology is a big part of our lifestyle. There is so much we can do if we decide to see outside of the box and open our mind to new ideas. It's a matter of taking action and surrounding yourself (well virtually for now) with people who impact your life in a positive way.

Look at how people are being creative and taking control of the situation! It did not take long to see the solidarity and faith we are building between businesses and communities: being forced to be appart is actually bringing us closer to each other.

If like us you care about our planet, you will agree when we say this situation is also having a positive impact on the environment (beside the single use products that are unfortunately coming back): pollution is decreasing, some animals are coming back where they belong… It's making us understand that we need to go back to a more natural and healthier way of living.

In a nutshell, it's teaching us what is essential in life and how to be happy with less than we think we need.

 
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It is time to focus on you

Before everything happened, we always complained we didn’t have enough time because we were all busy working our butts off. Well, see this situation as the perfect opportunity to take time for yourself: you do not have excuses anymore to push back your projects and own growth.

Don't roll your eyes, we all find excuses, Juliette and I included :)

We have access to so many useful online ressources like books, classes, podcasts, movies… So it should be easy to finally learn that new language you always wanted to speak, write this book that have been at the back of your mind for so long or launch your online cooking classes you have been working on. Boredom is a negative feeling that can easily be transformed if you feel at peace with yourself.

Stop stopping yourself and give it a try (what do you have to lose anyway?)!

You are not alone

It is not because we are in quarantine that we have to be alone: get to know those people you have interest in. Simply send them a message and start a conversation. You might be surprised to see that you can still create friendships.

If social distancing is getting to hard to deal with and you start to feel lonely, then organize virtual drink dates with your friends, dance parties, books reading… whatever group activities that can make have some fun.

Remember that you are loved and have people around you who are here when you feel lonely, scared and stressed. You just have to reach out to them.

 

And to us! We are here for you as well.

 

The goal of this article is not to tell you what to do and how you should react. We all have different ways to deal with stressful situations and make ourselves feel better. We just want to bring some sunshine and hope and let you know that you will be ok: you are strong enough to adapt and change your lifestyle, so you can keep building that awesome life you deserve!

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Jessica on Learning to Let Go and Focusing Energy Inward - Scandaleuse x Shedoesthecity

This article is part of our collaboration with She Does The City & Womanizer, in which we help them feature fierce AF womxn in boudoir photo shoots. We love working with them because they know that getting undressed for the camera is a catalyst for far more than we could have predicted.

We even have some sweet news for you as they are looking for more Scandals to feature there with a FREE shoot! Reach out to them at erotica@shedoesthecity.com

 
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“After her mother died, Jessica Flaman‘s sense of self shifted considerably. The process of grief has forever altered her, and it continues to play a major role in how she perceives her wants, her path, and her priorities. She is now practicing how to “let go” and loosen the desire to control all aspects of her life. These ideas and more are explored on her daringly honest Instagram account, @conversationsaboutdeath.

We don’t always connect major life events to our body or our exuality, but Jessica draws interesting correlations.

Feelings follow us everywhere; they often become the seeds that birth new ideas and likewise get us looking in the mirror with a fresh perspective. 

SDTC: How did it feel to do this photo shoot?

JF: Having people whom I have never met come into my personal space, see me naked and then tell me how to pose was a huge test in vulnerability, and I think I did a pretty good job! (Note from Scandaleuse: YES INDEED!!)

How would you describe your sexuality?

I don’t think sexuality is something that can necessarily be described, but if I could sum it up in a couple of words: curious and fun. I tend not to take it too seriously.

When it comes to feeling good in your own skin, what advice would you give to your younger self?

Our bodies are our one and only constant companion, here to support us, carry us and teach us as we navigate our way through life.

I would tell her to stop focusing so much on her physical appearance as a way to get validation from others, and instead to focus that energy inward. Chasing love and acceptance is a losing battle because those things can’t really be sought after; they have to come from within and be cultivated on a soul level. Ultimately, I’d tell her to let go of the need to have the “perfect body” because it doesn’t exist, and to instead learn how to see beauty in her strength.

 
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What turns you on?

Confidence, security, emotional intelligence, honesty and a REALLY good sense of humour! Anyone who can challenge me to do better and be better and who can appreciate the qualities that set me apart from other people.

Can you share with us about @conversationsaboutdeath and what inspired it? 

Conversations is a little on-going creative project I started shortly after my mom passed. Initially, I had intended to focus the stories only on death, but while travelling through India, I learned about disenfranchised grief and what a shapeshifter it can be.

By accessing and utilizing the community, genuine connections are made and, in turn, a platform is created for those who have experienced loss to share their stories. 

What mantra or philosophy is currently guiding your life?

There is one saying I came across a few months ago that I am constantly repeating to myself:

“If it is meant for me, I can never lose it. If it is not meant for me, I don’t want it.”

For me, it’s the perfect reminder to let go of what I can’t control, which I often struggle with!

What goal are you currently working towards?

I am working diligently at making Conversations more of a staple in the community. I know I am onto something, I just need to really dig in and figure out what that something is, which is more of a challenge these days because I am studying for my Masters in Social Work at U of T, and that takes up a lot of my time and energy. That being said, I feel very fortunate to have a passion project that is so closely aligned with my background in Art Therapy and Social Work.

What are you most looking forward to this fall?

Definitely going for runs down by the lake, in addition to copious amounts of dog park visits with my new dog, Jake!”

 
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Circus Industry In Lingerie = The Boudoir Circus

You may have seen it several times over our social media, but we actually just did our third session for The Boudoir Circus. If you are not very familiar with this project, now is a good time to catch up!

 
 

A love for aerial silks

Fanny and I started practicing aerial silks 3 years ago, after seeing it done in South America. It was intriguing and beautiful. A few clicks later and we were signed up for our absolute beginner class with Jamie Holmes. Needless to say, we fell in love with it very quickly and decided to buy our own equipment and we kept practicing over the years.

Circus arts are just starting to get more and more popular, especially in Canada. They require determination, patience and preciseness. Even tough it could look easy to you, the minute you are off the ground, you can feel how heavy your body is. You cannot get cocky before starting any aerial apparatus!

Hi, it is I!

Hi, it is I!

Why The Boudoir Circus?

A year ago, I had my own little shoot done while on the silks. I still have a print in my lacy bodysuit right in my living room. It made me so proud and I was so pleased with myself to have done it! When we opened Scandaleuse, we started thinking about partnerships with other businesses and Jamie just had opened her brand new studio: Studio Flux.

After a meeting, we all got excited about offering a mini boudoir session, on the silks. However, we wanted high quality and we noticed that this kind of silks photos were not really out there yet. Aerialist managed to get some solid photographs but most of the time, they all look the same. We definitely took advantage of it and brough studio lighting equipment, determined to get mind-blowing pictures, with a sexy touch (we add sexy to everything we can guys, you know that by now!)

We did a couple of tests before, blocked a 3-hour time slot, started with 4 people and then we scheduled the first event in July 2017.

We were sold out in one week.

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Giving an excuse for a shoot

A lot of people need a solid excuse to get a boudoir shoot done. Being able to show your passion while shooting makes them automatically at ease. They feel good, they look good. They are at their best. They are also a little challenged, posing in front of a camera is already harder than you would think, but doing it in the air, holding a not-so comfortable position and make it look like it's the easiest thing on Earth is even worse!

Seeing the models being super excited at the end of the session, all dolled up, happy with themselves and ready to conquer the world is priceless. They could seem like everyday people, but yet, they are working on their superpowers!

Our next goal: MEN & get different apparatus

While we absolutely adore aerial silks, we are dying to get different apparatus. Rope, trapeze, lyra, the possibilities are endless! We are also opening the next sessions to contortion. It's amazing to see a human body perform and defy gravity!

Also, WHERE ARE THE MEN?

Many of you gentlemen perform in the circus industry. Oh we know. Now come get naked please!

While we don't have the next session available, you can still follow us on our Facebook and Instagram to be the first to know when the next TBC will happen. It is open to men & women, for all levels!

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Makeup or not makeup?

We always tell our Scandals to put more makeup than usual for their boudoir shoot. The reason behind this is because, on our sensors, it doesn't look as intense as you would think. Lighting, lenses, angles and so on can change makeup very dramatically! The ideal goal would be to get a makeup artist and guess what... we have one for you. Let us introduce you to Nicola.

 
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Hi, who are you?

Hi! I’m Nicola but everyone calls me Nic.  I’m relatively new to the makeup scene on a professional level but have tons of experience on and off camera, as a model and makeup/hair artist.  I studied makeup and hair styling at Sheridan College but looking back I always found myself getting involved in projects that required hair and makeup!  I love what I do and with every job comes a new and fun experience I get to share with the person in my chair!

How long have you been a makeup artist/hairstylist for?

I started out working in amateur theatre five years ago and over the past few years have started experimenting with different photographers and creative people to develop my style and techniques.

Why you should makeup for your boudoir shoot - Scandaleuse Photography Toronto

Why would you recommend our clients to have their makeup done professionally?

Having a makeup artist on board for your shoot adds all the more fun to the experience! It's one less thing to worry about and having someone who is experienced with all ethnicities, ages, and various looks, like myself, will help create your desired look with ease!  It adds a little something more to the photo too, because these aren't your typical day-to-day photos your makeup shouldn't be either! This is your time to relax and get pampered.

What makeup advice can you give to our next Scandal?

A flawless makeup application starts before you touch any makeup to the face.  Taking care of your skin not only helps you get the most out of your makeup but it will help delay wrinkles and other signs of aging! And the best products aren't always the most expensive ones; don’t be afraid to grab those drugstore products!

Is there anything a model should do before getting pampered by you?

For hair, it’s typically best if the hair hasn’t been washed in the past 24hrs.  Clean hair is stripped of all of its natural oils which actually help with the styling process! Skin prep is always appreciated but not necessary, the only thing I would recommend is washing and moisturizing your face the night before.

What about the gentlemen?

Same ways for guys! Hair is easier to style if it hasn’t been washed in the past 24hrs.  With that being said if you typically style your hair with product, wash it out the night before your shoot and try to come with no product in your hair.  Let your stylist know how you like to typically style your hair as well, we want to enhance who you are and bring any of your “must have products”! Don’t be scared of makeup! It washes off I promise and I always have makeup remover if you don’t feel comfortable leaving your shoot with makeup on. All the guys on fitness magazines and fashion magazines have tons of makeup on! It can look super natural and just enhance your best features!

Last word for the road?

Never be afraid to ask questions and ALWAYS let your artist know prior to the session if you have an allergies or sensitivities to products.  Lastly, it’s all about having fun & I’ll do everything I can to make sure both you and I are enjoying our time together and that you feel fantastic on camera!

You can book your pampering sesison with Nicola with any of our packages!

 
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5 reasons to spend more time in adult stores

Sexy Sunday talk: Sex shops! I am pretty sure most of you have been to an adult store before, if not then it’s okay, you probably will after reading this.

 
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The first time in an adult shop is like the first time you make love. It is confusing, we don’t really know where to go, what we can touch… So yeah, not the best experience. Like sexuality, you need to practice to make it feel better and be more confident about it.

It's very likely you will end up doing what 99% of people do: go once, feel weird and you won't try again because you will just rehash that first experience. I personally do not go often, but when I do, I aim for the classy and friendly ones.

Before giving you the reasons why you should embrace your curiosity and take this step, let me tell you about my first time there... when I was 4. Yes, you read right. I actually had to ask my mother to remind me this story, as you know, your memory is not the sharpest at that age.

My mom, my godmother and the four-year-old me were walking downtown Paris, in les Halles area (if you're familiar with Paris!) after our casual Toy Story moving outting. We turned into a street full of sex stores and peep-shows at that time. Because I was very curious, I could not stop asking my mom about those “shops”. She thought it would be a good idea (because of Toy Story) to tell me they were selling toys for adults. Oh mom...

I was just staring at the windows, while my mom and godmother were talking. And suddenly, I just crawled under the curtain (for people who never been to les Halles, lots of those peep-shows don’t have entrance doors per se but velvet curtains instead).

My mom had to go in, get me out and the young salesman was too surprised to catch me while I was running towards the dildos. It was such an awkward moment for the clients who ended up leaving the store because they felt too embarassed to stay. Talk about cockblock.

It took only 2 minutes to my mom to take me out not without bumping into a gentleman going in. He became as red as a tomato and pretended he was going in the wrong store.

I apparently created a big mess that day!

I went back years later with my friends, when I was a teenager. I have lots a great memories about laughing and making jokes at the products.

 
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Here are 5 reasons to spend more time in sex stores:

An other world

I am always amazed to see the diversity of products you can find for sexuality and desire. It is open for all level, either you are looking for something sensual or erotic: massage oils, dildos or silicone vagina, you will find something for you. They have amazing and high quality pieces, like those colorful glass sex toys, they are captivatingly beautiful.

Body-positivity

Sex stores are part of this category of few places where you are free to be yourself. No judgement and everybody is welcome: young adults to older people, women and men, straight or LGBTQ community… No one cares about the way you look or your career, the money you have or the places you are going to. 

Educational

Believe it or not, you can learn very interesting things. Lots of sex shops organize different workshops, from learning how to do a blowjob to communicating your desires to your partner or even getting prepared with your next challenge (being half naked in front of a camera) with a boudoir photography workshop. Oh wait, the last one is done by us!

Personally, I found pretty interesting ones like: “Bigger, better, multiples: orgasms for every body” or “compassionate communication: crossing the bridge to connection”. If you feel attracted by those workshops, Good for Her has great ones.

Amazing lingerie

Oh ladies, the lingerie they have is marvelous and so tasteful.  I am in love every time I am going in a sex shop. Bras, panties, bodysuits, jumpsuits, tights, stockings, thongs, sexy, fancy, with straps, lace, leather… Disneyland for women! Prices are affordable and you have lots of choice.

Great people

Why are adult stores great? Not just because of the products they have but also because of the people who work in those places: open minded, professional, friendly and knowledgeable. They will guide you, answer your questions, show you the new arrivals and make you have a great experience. But no worries if you prefer to not talk to anybody, they will leave you alone.

 
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The time of creepy and crappy places is over! We love clean and friendly stores.  For our scandals who live in Toronto, BlogTo did a great article about the best Sex Shops in town.

It is now your turn to tell us your first experience or best memory from those adult stores!

With love

 

Fancy a personal shopping session?

Scandaleuse is not just about a boudoir shoot. We pride ourselves to create a full experience and make it unique to your sexy self. If you are having a blast, then so are we. That's why we just teamed up with Ashley, the lovely advisor from Seduction, downtown Toronto, to help you pick outfits and kill your shoot.

What's the deal?

Upon booking your shoot with us, you can schedule an appointment with Ashley for an hour long personal shopping session. The good deal? On top of the great lingerie selection that Seduction has, you get at 10% discount on your purchase at the shop. This deal is available for any of our packages.

Now, Scandals, meet Ashley:

 
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Who are you?

Hello Scandaleuse World! My name is Ashley.
I would describe myself as an old soul, who marches to the beat of my own drum. I would also say that I’m maybe a little bit of a workaholic… but when you love what you do, it’s easy to let it take over.  I’ve been working in the Adult Retail environment for 5+ years and honestly, it’s been a lot of fun. In my spare time, I’m also a freelance model, a netflix binger and a book worm.

Let's talk about your job at Seduction:

I’ve been with Seduction for just about 3 years now, and I keep myself busy in all things creative around the store. While I spend a lot of my time on the sales floor, coaching couples and singles on how to keep their sex lives interesting, I organize and style photoshoots for advertising which can be found in newspapers, online or even posters around the city. last but not least, I’m also a main contributor to our social media.

Why should our models go to you before their session?

I believe that everyone deserves to feel sexy in their skin. What you wear says a lot about who you are, or what you want to represent. Fashion, to me, is an outlet of creative expression. What I wear on a day to day basis makes all the difference in how I feel. During photoshoots, especially boudoir, it’s important that the models are comfortable, and confident in what they’re wearing. I want to make you stand out because you are beautiful and deserve to be noticed. When I accomplish that with a new client, it makes me that much more proud of what I do.

What can our Scandals expect from an hour with you?

We want you to feel special, so when you book an hour with me, you’ll get an hour of undivided attention. I want to get to know you. Asking questions will allow me to get a better sense of what kind of style or vibe you want to go for, and that will help me select outfits that will be appropriate. After the question period, we’ll walk around the store together collecting a handful of items that might be of interest, and then you’ll spend time trying the outfits on to ensure that you look and feel good for your photoshoot. When we’re done, you’ll walk out knowing that you made the right choice.

We don't know about you guys, but we are hooked. Check out our selection of lingerie and accessories we found when we met Ashley for her headshot.

Find Seduction:

  • 577 Yonge Street Toronto, On, M4Y 1Z2

  • 493 Queen St W, Toronto, ON, M5V 2B4