Earlier this year, we had the pleasure to photograph a fabulous woman, Madame M, who reached out because she was finally ready to try boudoir photography. In her initial inquiry, she mentioned that despite being 61 years old, she wanted to continue to feel empowered with her body and sensuality.
Since it was her first time, she was very nervous about her photoshoot. She shared with us that while she was on her way to our studio, she had kind of a panic attack to a point where she was very close to turn back and give up on this experience. Boudoir photography has been in the back of her mind for a long time, yet some little voices (fed by social norms and fear) were almost stronger than the excitement of finally doing her boudoir shoot. But she managed to stay strong and showed up for your photoshoot!
We are so glad she didn’t give up. She posed so well and her photos are beautiful! She truly deserved to experience boudoir photography. Her story, as well as all the other wonderful women who posed in front of our lens, inspired us to write today’s blog, hoping it can help women to take that step as well 💛
Women and ageism, it’s time to stop that BS!
Most women over a certain age do not dare to try boudoir photography, and how can we blame them? The stigma against aging women is brutal, and boudoir photography doesn’t help the cause! There are so little representations of women over 50 or 60 years old in the boudoir industry because society still believes that beauty equals being young. In society’s eyes, women lose value as they age, but they also become those sexless beings who lost touch with their sensuality. Because of those stereotypes, most fashion and boudoir photographers have over time prioritized younger women for their artistic projects, giving no room to people not fitting in these criteria.
Boudoir photography isn’t an easy experience, especially for first timers, as it can make people feel quite vulnerable (not everyone can easily pose in their underwear in front of a stranger!). Most of the inquiries we receive are coming from people who want to regain confidence, and learn to like their body the way it is. So for a woman who might be lacking body-confidence and has been told by the media that because she passed a certain age she is now worthless, doing a boudoir shoot can be extremely difficult!
Meeting those women who want to try boudoir so badly but stop themselves because they feel like they are not good enough breaks our hearts, and we wish mentalities could change faster! Thankfully, more and more people in the industry, us included, fight to change those social constructs. It is taking some time, but things are evolving. Now we need more brave people to try boudoir and share their awesome pictures with the world so they can inspire more people to do the same (honestly, that is the faster way to create a change)!
Fight those negative voices that are stopping you from doing a shoot!
But how can someone find the strength to give it a try even though they might feel really anxious about it? Well, if you are reading this blog and recognize yourself in those words, know that you are not alone! Many people are curious, yet afraid, by boudoir photography. And our main advice would be to first find the perfect photographer for you! Choosing the right person for the job is the most important step, as you want to make sure you will feel comfortable during the process. Then, just do it instead of overthinking the whole experience. The more you think about something that stresses you out, the more excuses you will find to not do it.
And 👏shut👏those👏voices👏down👏. If you are excited about doing a boudoir shoot, but you suddenly start thinking that you are too old, not thin enough, not muscular enough and whatnot, think about something else or keep focusing on the joy you get from doing a shoot.
Please believe us when we say that you are perfect the way you are! The beauty industry makes millions of dollars, selling us products we don’t need and making us believe we have to look a certain way to be worthy and desirable. There should not be any beauty standards to begin with, but unfortunately it is what it is. What we can do on our side is fight this nonsense by accepting our natural beauty and celebrate our body.
And what better way than a boudoir shoot to do so !