A little while ago, we came across a story of an actress who had some risqué photos, taken a few years before for a magazing, resurfacing. While she said she had nothing to be ashamed of and was actually proud of her photos (YES!), a wave of negative comments popped everywhere. You know, the classic judgy, borderline slutshaming kind.
While this is unfortunately common, we were surprised to see that the majority of those comments came from women.
So, while the media just screams “women supporting women” with a layer of pink glitter, it seems that when it comes to actually do it, we still have a bit to go.
Woman to woman hostility: why does it even happen to begin with?
Is it jealousy?
You must have heard growing up ”ugh, she's just jealous” when you got criticized by another girl, especially when it comes to a physical comment. Just because you get a nasty comment on your physique doesn’t mean it is because the other woman wants to look like you. We personally think it is an easy way to label it and it goes much deeper than “just” jealousy.
Heavy expectations
Gigantic expectations have been weighing on women for centuries. So much so that we have been deeply conditioned to think that certain things are acceptable for women, and some aren’t, for no good reason whatsover. It creates frustration that builds up so much over time that when someone dares to ignore those expectations, it just hurts too much that we couldn't do it and they could.
The fear of judgment
What is the #1 obstacle that makes us feel so small and intimidated when we want to try something new? The fear of being judged.
Many of us are terrified by the idea that someone points the finger at us laughing when you dare trying something outside the box. And what happens next? We give up before even starting, thinking it is not worth the risk. Once again, when someone gathers the courage to do something we put in the risky category and comes out the other end safe & sound AND happier, frustration comes into play.
The backlash this actress received had nothing to do with the actual photos of her body. They were about the fact that she did something considered “improper” but yet she looks beautiful & confident and she is owning it.
Something “bad” is not supposed to make you feel or look good and she went against that. That’s why the frustration monster popped its head out and when we don't acknolewdge it, it manifests into toxicity.
Women have already so many battles to fight, and there is one we can easily win: let’s stop turning on each other and empower each other instead.
The female collective: an endless source of power that benefit us all
When we are aware of those super-powers, this is when magic happens.
Working of the common good is our biggest strength.
The majority of us get higher energy when we know we contributed to the common good. Over the years, it got labelled as a maternal and nurturing instinct, making it more limited and not necessarily taken seriously.
But this is a major asset. Collective work is how changes happen. You can only go so far alone, and we got that many moons ago without even noticing.
Mastering the art of empowerment.
How many times have your friends given you the boost of confidence you needed? Out of these, how many times was it much stronger than your own pep talk?
Thanks to our ability to work for the common good, we have also developed another skill: creating a bulletproof support system. We can make anyone feel seen and appreciated in a matter of minutes.
We are the best cheerleaders and through this, we don't need to empower ourselves because someone is doing it for us while we empower someone else and so on.
Unstoppable - our project that illustrated it all
Everything we just wrote really sunk it our brains back in 2018 after witnessing it all for a couple years. We empowered women with our work and it empowered us back. So we decided to illustrate it by posing 12 women who didn't know each other, together, in a context deemed "inappropriate” to the outside world.