sexy photography toronto

How to choose your boudoir photographer

Hi there!

If you are a first timer on our website, welcome to the Scandaleuse family 😀. If it is not your first time reading one of our blogs, know it is nice to have you back here! In both cases, we hope you can find some answers here if you are looking to do a shoot!

 
 

When it comes to boudoir photography, you want to make sure you find the perfect photographer to shoot with. Maybe it will be your first time trying boudoir and maybe you feel a bit anxious about it… Nothing to worry about, this feeling is normal! For a lot of people it is already hard to have their pictures taken, so the idea of posing half naked in front of a stranger can be even more nerve-racking even if they really want to try it.

To make sure you get the most out of your boudoir experience, and you feel 100% at ease the day of your shoot, it is really important you find the perfect match: AKA your dream photographer!

Do not necessarily go for the cheapest

Of course prices are important, and we understand not everyone have the budget to do a boudoir shoot since it can be quite of an investment. But if it is something you really want to treat yourself with, there are other factors to take into consideration.

If you go with the cheapest professionals, obviously you will get lower prices, but on the other hand you will sacrifice things that are important and can make your shoot go smoothly. For example, you might get:

  • A shorter shoot and be rushed to pose.

    Which can cause you a lot of stress, and you might end up looking tensed on the final pictures.

  • A photographer that is new in photography or not really confident in their work.

    The risk is that this person might not be able to pose you properly nor find the best angles during your shoot. An inexperienced photographer might also not know how to guide you and can easily use the wrong words that sometimes can be misleading or not really appropriate!

    They might also not be able to give you what you are looking for if you have specific ideas in mind.

  • A lack of quality with the final pictures.

    Such as unbalanced colours and lighting, which affects the colour of your skin and intensify your skin’s texture (including pimples, bruises, cellulite, …). Or a poor editing process. Even if we believe photographers should never change someone’s body (we are not plastic surgeons!), when we edit your pictures we make sure to unify your skin tones or soften tan lines if you have some.

  • Low resolution pictures with the photographer’s watermark.

    This means that you would not be able to print them the size you wish and will end up with the photographer’s signature on all of your pictures. If you are looking to have clean prints or a beautiful album in the future, that might be an issue.

Those are a few pointers among other ones. Like anything in life you want to purchase, if you go for a low price, you know you are not going to get the best product or service. In our opinion, it is not something you want to experience with boudoir photography. A cheap shoot is never worth the struggles and disappointment you might get in return. If you really want to treat yourself with a boudoir session but don’t have the budget yet, it is better to wait a bit longer rather than rushing into it.

Also know that payment plans can be an option! We don’t know about the other studios, but on our end we are more than happy to be flexible with payments so you can access the beautiful world of boudoir photography more easily.

Safety first

We wrote a full blog about this very important topic here as we heard some horrific stories happening to some people. We highly suggest reading it or watch the video below:

 
 

The recap:

Avoid Kijiji or Craiglist.
Always meet with your photographer(s)
• Check the company's reputation with reviews or referrals.
• Have a contract signed and the details of the session laid out before the day of. Everything has to be crystal clear.
Bring someone with you or let someone know where you will be and when you'll be done.

First impression always matters

Trust your instinct! We mentioned it in the video above, but we want to write here as it is primordial:

Always listen to your guts!

It does not matter what detail triggered that little voice in your head telling you there is something not working with this photographer, just listen to it. Our body usually picks up on people’s energy before our brain does, especially as women (we have a natural protective instinct). So if you feel it is not gonna work out, it probably will not. It is always better to find someone else!

Values are important

Like in any relationships, either it is professional or personal, sharing the same values is important in order to make the most out of the time you will spend together. Since boudoir can be an experience that makes you feel vulnerable, feeling 100% comfortable around the person who is guiding you during your shoot is a must.

If you don’t relate to the message the photographer is sharing through their branding, or you cannot really “recognize” yourself in their work, it is usually a sign this is not a good match.

Contract and privacy release

Even if we love being able to share our clients’ pictures to inspire other people to do a shoot and show the diversity in our clientele, we understand that privacy is important. When choosing a photographer, make sure they have a release option to sign, so they keep your pictures private if you wish to.

Also, you want to make sure to sign a contract that summarize all the details from the shoot and what you are supposed to get. This is to avoid any unpleasant surprises such as change of pricing, hidden fees or any other clauses you were not aware of.

Your vibe should match their style

Every photographer has a personal artistic style, so what you see on a photographer’s website is most likely what you are going to get. Before hiring your photographer, you want to make sure they can give you what you are looking for.

For example, if you are looking for a homey vibe with a nice decors and plants for your pictures background and atmosphere, you don’t want to go for a photographer who mostly shoot in a simple studio on a white background.

Everything has to be crystal clear

Beautiful black woman wearing blond wig posing naked in an indoor jungle

Your boudoir experience, from meeting the photographer to getting the finale product (with everything in between), should happen smoothly and you should not feel confused about the process. Never hesitate to ask questions (as long as you respect your photographer’s time) or ask for extra clarification if needed.

Once again, if you feel the photographer you contacted isn’t being really responsive, you might wanna look at other options.

Your boudoir shoot is about you and yourself only! So when you find the perfect photographer that will make you feel like your most badass, sexy, confident, or whatever-else-you-wanna-feel self, you are going to have an amazing experience 😍

Boudoir is a life-changing experience, and we cannot wait for you to try it!

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How to Make Your Boudoir Photoshoot Fun and Pressure-Free

When people connect with us regarding a boudoir photography, it is very common for them to feel nervous. Not only does boudoir photography requires a lot of trust in the person shooting it, the majority of our clients hs also never done anything like it before. There are a few ways to make this experience as stress-free as possible, so you can make the most of it.

 
 

Remind yourself why you want to do a boudoir photoshoot.

Before letting self-doubt and fear take over, pause for a moment and consider why you’re drawn to this experience in the first place.

Is it to feel more confident in your body or to celebrate it? To learn to let loose and be more positive about yourself? Maybe you want to try something new, or perhaps you’re thinking of sharing it with a loved one? Whatever your reason, it is a beautiful one, and it didn’t pop in your brain out of nowhere. Hold on to it, especially in the early stages of your boudoir adventure.

Relax? Easier said than done!

Very true, it might not be easy to relax but lucky for you we have some tips that will help you to do so :

  • Avoid planning last minute.

While we can accommodate last minute shoots, it is not something we necessarily recommend. Doing things last minute is rarely a good idea as it creates unnecessary pressure due to rushing. We suggest you book your shoot a month in advance so you have time to gather everything you need and nicely prep for your shoot.

  • Find the perfect boudoir studio.

Each boudoir photographers have their own style and way of working. When you look for the perfect match, don’t stop just at the aesthetic of their work. It is very important you book a meeting (either on the phone, Zoom, or in-person) to talk about the details and see if their way of working is aligned with what you are looking for.

For example: will they make you sign a contract? How do they handle privacy? Is makeup and hair included? Are their pricing transparent and clear? Who is the actual photographer? Do not hesitate to ask questions or share any concerns you might have.

If you book a photographer you don't feel comfortable with, it will tarnish your shoot and the all experience.

  • Enjoy the getting ready part.

Planning for the photoshoot itself is often overlooked but it is so much fun! Looking for ideas, thinking of the vibes you want to create, and putting outfits together.

To keep this as pressure-free as possible, dive into it with the proper mindset: do not compare yourself to anyone you will see online and don't limit yourself and your abilities to pose like a badass. Create a Pinterest board or mood board and save anything that catches your eye.

Taking the time to prep for your shoot build up the excitement and the confidence around this experience.

 
 
  • Your shoot should look like you

When doing a shoot, you should not feel like you are wearing a disguise. From the outfits to the atmosphere of each set, you have to feel 100% like yourself.

Make sure to bring outfits you love and you feel good in. It doesn't have to be classic lingerie! Any outfit can be turned into a boudoir one with the right creativity. Also, go through your favourite pieces that are considered too much and give them a spin.

  • Consider bringing props

Props can be a game-changer on a photoshoot. Not only does it make your session even more true to yourself, but it also gives you something "to do” if you are camera-shy. Props can vary from something as simple as your favourite coffee mug or book to some things related to a beloved hobby of yours.

  • Have fun!!!!!!!

And finally when you checked all of the above, just enjoy your shoot 😘 Practice some poses in front of your mirror, create a playlist to bring with you the day of your shoot, be playful while posing, let your inner badass-self out, imagine you are in a fashion show,…

Don’t let the camera frighten you, this is just an accessory that will capture the moment you finally shine and let yourself be your beautiful you!

Boudoir photography will really help you reconnect with your body and sensuality. And it is something we all have (or had) a hard time with due to the old school fashion industry’s beauty standards and the judgment coming from others. We know some of you might be thinking: “Well I am not beautiful and really not sensual!”. Those thoughts are very common, but let us tell you something: they are also false.

You are beautiful! You are sensual! It does not matter what you identify to, your age, or the body you have, we all are gorgeous, sexy, and sensual beings.

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6 tips for a better boudoir experience while being on your period

We all agree that being on our period isn’t a pleasant experience: being in pain, losing blood, being tired, having our hormones going crazy, feeling bloated, having to use the bathroom often, and much more, makes it hard to feel like a sexy and confident being. So when the time of your boudoir shoot comes and you realize you will be on your period, it can feel like a bummer.

But don’t you worry, today we are giving you 6 tips that will help you have a positive boudoir experience while being on your period if you cannot push back your shoot!

Painkillers medicine

This one is a given but feeling comfortable while doing your boudoir shoot is very important, so you want to make sure to not be in pain while posing. Don’t hesitate to take some pain killers before leaving for your shoot. Taking them at least 30 minutes before the beginning of your boudoir session should do the trick!

Avoid wearing sanitary pads

If possible do not use pads, especially if you are planning to wear some lingerie. Pads are thick and very difficult to hide so instead you might want to use a tampon or menstrual cup. But if you do not like having a foreign object in your body, you can find nowadays beautiful period underwear that can be perfect for a boudoir shoot.

Bring one or two small towels

Having a couple of hand towels in your bag while on your period is always useful. You might need them if you have to clean yourself quickly, or use one to put under your bum in case you are worried you might stain the furniture you are sitting or laying on. Don’t forget to also take a plastic bag with you so you can put the used towels in it!

Change and freshen up

We all know how uncomfortable it is to spend a part of your day with an almost full period protection and wondering if it is leaking because it is time to change it. For your peace of mind and a better boudoir experience we recommend you to change whatever period product you are using just before starting your shoot. And if you can, do not hesitate to rinse yourself as well so you know there is no risk of smell or visual.

Avoid lingerie that is too tight

If you are like us, you know that when we are on our period it feels good to wear loose clothes. Since our uterus feels (and is) bigger than usual, wearing tight pants or tight underwear is very uncomfortable. If you only bring tight lingerie or gorgeous corset to wear during your boudoir session, you will end up spending the entire shoot feeling constricted, and it might show on the final pictures. To avoid this, bring a mix of different outfits so you can switch from wearing tight clothes to loose ones. It will make the session more comfortable for you!

Bring some outfits that covers your belly

It is not something you will hear us say often! Usually we like to tell our clients to show the parts of their body they like the less instead of hiding them during their boudoir shoot (it is in our opinion the best way to learn to accept and love those parts). But being on our period means that we are naturally bloated, and we know it is not a pleasant feeling.

On top of making our belly bigger than it usually is, there is also the discomfort that goes with it. So we understand that people don’t necessarily want to see that on their photographs. If you can relate, then bring some outfits that will hide your bloated belly such as bodysuits, babydoll gowns, dresses, shirts…

Bonus tip

Don’t hesitate to tell us if you are experiencing any discomfort or pain during your shoot so you can take a break to calm the cramps down. Here are a few items you can bring with you that can help ease the pain during the shoot:

  • Herbal tea to drink during your session. Red raspberry leaves, ginger, peppermint, and chamomile tea, can help to reduce the bloating and calm down period cramps.

  • Heat or cold pad. Heat can help relax the muscles contributing to cramping, so applying heat to your abdomen or back can help relieve your pain.

    An ice pack can also reduce pain. Cold therapy narrows blood vessels, which eases menstrual cramps.

  • Extra medicine to take if the pain comes back during your boudoir session.

As mentioned, your boudoir shoot should be a fun and comfortable experience. So if the idea of having your period during your session makes you feel uncomfortable, don’t hesitate to ask us if it is possible to push back your session, especially if you give us a couple of weeks notice. But in case it is not possible, try to not stress too much about it and follow those guidelines. If you manage to relax during this time, you will still get a beautiful experience 💛

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The thrill of outdoor boudoir

With the beautiful weather and temperature being nice and toasty, the opportunity for outdoor boudoir shoots is knocking a t our doors,for our greatest pleasure. Those tend to spark a lot of curiosity; after all, why would you do an outdoor shoot? How is that even doable? Let's dive in!

 
 

“Why would I even do an outdoor boudoir shoot?”

1) Some of us don't belong inside.

When you are considering having boudoir photos done, you want them to look like you. The real you, when you feel badass, confident and comfortable. For many of us, it is easier to feel this way when we are outdoors. Especially because being outdoors usually emphasize…

2) The feeling of freedom.

The outdoors, especially nature, is very often associated with peace and freedom, it's just in the air. That's why even guided meditation tend to “take” you outside. The energy is different, it is powerful and calm at the same time. Why stopping yourself from enjoying it?

3) A little extra challenge to satisfy your adventurous side.

If you are looking for an extra thrill during your boudoir shoot, shooting outdoors makes you feel SUPER badass because it is even more “unconventional” than an indoor boudoir shoot. If you have a rebellious spirit, you will definitely enjoy posing outdoors

4) The sceneries!

Why limit yourself to a home that could look like someone's else’s when you can have a beautiful scenery around you? A river, a mountain, a rooftop… It just makes it a lot more epic!

If you are feeling excited about all of those reasons, first: YAY! - then, let us take you through our logistics!

 

Winter works great too!

 

“How does it work if I want to shoot outside?”

There are a few things to consider before doing an outdoor boudoir photoshoot with us:

The best spots are semi-private

We can't really privatize an entire river, forest or street. Even though we have some secret spots that are off the beaten path, we can't guarantee that someone isn’t going to walk by. The good news ? The rare people we have seen really don't give a crap about the shoot and even apologized for disturbing us 😉

We are ninja photographers

The fact that the two of us are on every shoot makes it very easy & fast to cover you up if needed. One of us tends to stand close to you with a coat or towel while the other shoots.

We are mindful about nudity.

Chances are if you are looking to do an outdoor shoot, you are probably dreaming of having a beautiful nude or semi-nude image of yourself too (and you should, it is awesome). In case you were wondering: it is legal for women to be topless in Canada, and it has been forever, as long as we are being aware of what is around us. For example, no children around.

Since all of the spots we tend to go to are hidden, we never had a problem with nudity. Once again, having two shooters on set makes it easier to have someone on the lookout and cover you up in a second!

Partial nudity is usually a lot easier to manage, consider it if you feel like you’d want to experiment but aren’t looking to go too far!

If there is one thing we can promise is that you won't regret shooting outdoors. The settings are beautiful, the feeling is amazing and the final photos are epic.

The whole experience is truly magical, so if you were considering it, don't wait any longer, we will be happy to guide you through it!

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How boudoir shoots increased our confidence on every level

Since we opened Scandaleuse, both of us have been posing in boudoir settings for many reasons. To know what it actually feels like, to have content to share with our community, to be creative… But we often forget to talk about how it actually changed us too. There is definitely a before boudoir and after boudoir, even for us.

 
 

The expectations VS reality of boudoir.

Boudoir is usually thought as something you do for someone, likely a partner. People get in the mindset that they have to illustrate somebody else's fantasy, only to benefit them. We don't agree with that.

Boudoir should be done for yourself first. It's a way to get quality time with yourself, reclaim your body, see it in a new light. It's a chance to just exist without judgement and expectations. And it comes with long lasting effects you wouldn't know until you try. Even ourselves didn't know that before stepping in front of the lens. We have now been posing for 5 years and can confidently share all of the beautiful changes boudoir have done for us.

The given: we feel beautiful.

There is a lot of power behind feeling beautiful. A new energy emanates out of you, everything around you just feels lighter. It already feels wonderful in a regular setting but imagine feeling beautiful without your clothes on, which we aren't told to even think about. Now that's unlocking the next level of feel good vibes for sure!

The removal of negative body vision.

Rare are the ones who can tell they absolutely love their bodies. And who can blame us? We grow up naturally comparing ourselves to others and to beauty standards shaped by society. When something is not considered “beautiful", we are told to either hide it or to work hard to improve it. It is very easy to end up with a very negative vision of our appearance that follows us for years. For many of us, it even turns into body-dysmorphia.

Seeing our bodies repeatedly on photos without clothes on showed us what our bodies actually look like, and that is far away from what the crappy vision we had.

Don't get us wrong, it was scary at first, even for us. But what a slap in the face it was to see our bodies in an objective light. Turns out our "flaws” were not that flawed.

We are not afraid of our "sexy” sides anymore.

 
 

If you were to ask us 10 years ago if we thought we were sexy, we would have awkwardly laughed and say absolutely not. It was just inconceivable to even think it. Another prejudice we deal with: wanting to feel sexy, while being completely natural, is "wrong” so we just avoid it.

Doing boudoir photoshoots showed us that:

  1. Feeling sexy comes in many many ways, very few of them are even being related to sex and none of them are related to pleasing someone else.

  2. There is SO much power behind this feeling. Looking at our boudoir photos make us feel strong and badass as hell.

  3. We had been severely missing out on it.

Deconstructing the shame around something leads to turning it into confidence. And that works for anything.

What about the impact on the confidence then?

Tapping into all of these points has led us to a pretty rock solid confidence in ways we didn't even imagine:

• Reclaiming our bodies made us shut down the negative voices of our surroundings and instead focus on what WE feel good in and show it.

• Boudoir has successfully and positively forced us out of our comfort zone. This made it a lot less scary to try other experiences like that we didn't think we would ever try.

• Doing something that is considered shameful or frown upon by many and, again, ending up having a wonderful outcome has not only removed a lot of our fears but also comforted us in all of our choices afterwards. Even when people disagreed, even if it was unconventional. We just realized we were a lot strong than we thought.

After all, isn't confidence about having a "no fucks given” energy?

We went from shy, insecure beings to free, empowered and proudly sensual women. To this day, we use our boudoir shoot as reminders when we feel down or discouraged. These versions of ourselves were always there, they were just quiet and hard to uncover. Now, we hold on to them tight and cherish them.

And you should too. Set yours free and let it shine.

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The social aspect of boudoir photography

Juliette and I have never been part of those people who work only for money and security. We need our work to follow our personal values, and we want to contribute to make positive changes in our society. We are not saying we are changing the world but on our level we are creating positive impacts in our clients’ life, and we try as much as possible to spread awareness on social issues we care about.

Boudoir photography is our way to do so!

 
 

Such a transformative experience

When we opened Scandaleuse Photography 6 years ago, we wanted to showcase the beauty of the woman body in an artistic way. We build a community and stayed in touch with our Scandals. We were amazed to hear and read what our past clients were saying about their experience with us and how transformative the shoots were for them. Some of them told us they ended up toxic relationships, others quitted their job they did not like anymore… Witnessing those people changing their life because posing half naked in front of our lenses gave them the courage to do so, is a true honour for us and it gives us a feeling of purpose.

If you never try boudoir photography, it might be difficult to understand how a shoot can help someone feel more confident in their life to a point where it makes drastic changes. Let us explain:

Boudoir photography is not like any other type of photography (at least, the way we do it). It is rare to meet people who feel 100% confident in their own skin and who accept their body fully the way it is. Most of our clients are first timers, and the idea of posing in lingerie (or naked) in front of photographers can be nerve wracking for them. It takes a lot of courage to make yourself vulnerable and try something new that makes you feel nervous. So when you finally do a boudoir shoot, feel good showing your body in front of people you don’t know, and find yourself beautiful in those pictures, this experience gives you the wings to keep pushing yourself to do other scary things.

We like to stay that once you strip down in front of two strangers, nothing else in life can stop you 🔥.

People’s backgrounds & stories

Being boudoir photographers also gives us the chance to meet incredible people who are going through tough times in their life.

Some of our clients were in abusive relationships that completely destroyed them and they were looking for ways to build back their confidence and reappropriate their body. We work with transgender people who are fighting to exist in the gender they wished they were born with, when society doesn’t make it easy for them. We had clients who are dealing with breast cancer and wanted to immortalise their body before it changes. Few years ago we took pictures of a woman who was in a wheelchair, and wanted to celebrate herself and showcase that even if you are disable you are still a sensual human being.

Listening to so many life stories and seeing our clients fighting so many battles makes our work as boudoir photographers reach another level that we truly love. It is not about just taking beautiful pictures but helping people feel amazing about themselves.

This social side of boudoir photography makes our boudoir photography business so important to us, and we cannot wait to see where it will take us!

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5 tips to get ready for your boudoir shoot

You gathered your courage and finally booked your boudoir shoot? Yay, congrats!
So… now what? Do you just wait until your date and wing it?
Well, you can, but you can also do a few simple things to make the most out of this experience and enjoy it even more.

 
 

The shoot itself is an amazing experience, but preparing for it is also so much fun! It IS really nice to think about your outfits, your vibe, your looks.. It builds up the excitement, gives you some butterflies… All of the good stuff!

So, if you are looking for those butterflies and are not sure where to start, here are 5 simple ways to get ready for your boudoir session:

1) Look online for inspiration

Chances are, you probably did that before even inquiring, but if so, keep adding to it and if not, time to get some Pinterest out of you! Grab a glass of wine and get browsing! Search what boudoir means to you, think about some atmospheres, themes, poses and lighting you like and pin away! Not only it is a super fun process, but it is helpful for us as well as photographers to know what makes your heart sing.

Extra tip: Don’t worry about finding people who look like you, this is a vibe we are looking for, not photos to copy and paste. Try to ignore the poses as well, a lot of the ones we find online are performed by super bendy people and often edited in post.

2) Start working on your posture

Yep, time to straighten that back! Not only for aesthetic reasons, but also because adjusting your posture makes you stand tall and brings up confidence. Boudoir is all about making that confidence shine, so let's take it everywhere we can!

Extra tip: No need to overthink it, simply practice bringing your shoulder blades closer together and picture a thread pulling you from the top of your head. Et voilà!

3) Plan your outfits

Oh this is a goodie. Contrary to popular beliefs, you don't necessarily need to wear standard lingerie for your boudoir shoot. If anything, we are more looking for outfits you feel amazing and beautiful in, as it is very easy to bring a boudoir twist to clothes.

Any outfits can be turned into a boudoir one. What matters is what makes you feel like YOU. That's what we want to capture. So if you want to rock some lace, by all means, go for it, but if you are feeling more of a joggers/loose t-shirt vibe, then it is awesome too! Have fun with it!

Extra tip: Plan a solid top 3 of your favourite outfits and bring extra, even some bits and pieces you aren't sure to do what with. Chances are we may see something you haven't. If you need more inspiration, we wrote a blog post about the 5 best props we've seen on shoots, you can read it here.

 
 

4) Practice in the mirror

With you have a full length mirror at home, it is time to put it to use! Take a moment to try on your outfits, see what poses you like, check what your favourite parts of your body are and even if you have a preferred side. This little exercise, especially if boudoir is a bit challenging for you, will only make your session easier.

If you feel like you would just be hard on yourself, then ditch this step, focus on the others and just follow our lead the day of. For some of us, it can be difficult to face ourselves and keep it positive and that's okay. We will do it for you!

Extra tip: we have a complete online guide to experiment with boudoir at home and its costs is 100% redeemable on your boudoir session or package.

5) Prep a playlist

It is no secret that music leads the mood. It helps you relax and makes you feel like the main character in your story! All of our lofts have speakers ready to connect with your device, so have fun creating a playlist that makes you feel like the badass and sexy being you are!

Extra tip: check out our Scandaleuse playlist on Spotify! We have a bit of everything to get those good vibes out of you

Now you have all the tools you need to get beautiful ready for your boudoir shoot! Enjoy the pre-shoot process as much as you can, it is a big part of your experience, it would be a shame to miss out on it!

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5 fears stopping you from doing a boudoir shoot

A boudoir photoshoot is a powerful experience, way beyond pretty photos. It's an opportunity to boost your confidence, reconnect with yourself and give yourself well-deserverd quality time. But it is a vulnerable experience and it feels quite intimidating for many of you.

Let's dive in and debunk the 5 most common fears that might stop you for treating yourself to a boudoir shoot.

 
 

Fear #1: You don't have the "right” body.

Being surrounded by unachievable beauty standards in the media and social media making it incredibly easy to compare yourself to others, this is not a surprise that many of us think we would need to look a certain way in order to pose without clothes on. Too fat, too thin, not this enough, too much there, it is hard not to get lost in it! But that's exactly why boudoir is needed: to put an end all of this bullshit.

There is no right body. There are just bodies. They come in all shape and sizes and one kind isn't better than the other. Yours is great the way it is, because it is yours. It's been supporting you for many years and deserve some love and recognition for doing so. Wrinkles, stretch marks, scars, they all tell a story: your story. And that’s good enough.

And no, you don't need to lose weight before a photoshoot!

We actually don't recommend changing your body before a session, especially short-term. Otherwise, you risk looking back at those photos months later feeling like it is not you and that's the opposite of what we want! We want you to see your photos as a reminder of how beautiful you are with the body you have, and to remind you of this great confidence you have. That kind of magic stays forever!

Fear #2: Not feeling like a "sexy" person.

Again, we have been conditioned to think that it means one thing and one thing only: to provoke desire for somebody else (usually, for the male gaze…). Some things are sexy and some things aren't and that is it.

Well… it isn't. Being sexy is a feeling first, not a look, and it comes in many ways. It's an energy that makes you feel confident, badass, and sensual and there isn't any ultimate definition for any of these. You can feel sexy changing a lightbulb or wearing fancy lingerie.

Since it is such a versatile feeling, everybody can be sexy. You can make it your own so easily, don't be afraid to tap into it!

 
 

Fear #3: Not knowing how to pose.

Wait, you mean you don't know how to pose accordingly in a photography concept you've never tried before? How dare you!

Of course you don't know, and your photographer shouldn't expect you to! It's already hard enough to pose for simple family photos as it is! A good photographer will guide you through every pose and set. You shouldn't even have to think about it. All of our clients are first-timers, and it is part of our job to guide them to highlight their body and beauty during a session, not theirs.

Fear #4: Not feeling like yourself.

In traditional boudoir, some sort of lingerie is often involved. Well, we don't believe in tradition so it opens a lot more doors.

What you should think of when thinking of outfits is what you feel good in first. What outfit makes you feel confident? Beautiful? What are those pieces you got that made your heart skip a beat that you haven't gathered the courage to wear yet?

That's what we are looking for. A boudoir twist is very easily applicable on any oufits.

Of course a classic set of lingerie is an option but you can think outside the box and go for example with:

  • Bodysuits of any kind;

  • Jeans, joggers, overalls;

  • Cosplay and themed outfits

  • Loose tshirt, sweaters;

  • Dresses of any kind, robes, outfits rated as "too much”;

  • And much more as you can see here!

Fear #5: Where will those photos end up?

This one isn't related to body and mindset, but yet oh-so important: what happens to the photos afterwards?

Some people don't care at all using their photos online, but for the majority of people, having those photos around somehow is just not an option. In our case, this is a decision you let us know before we even book anything, and we just put it in writing and follow your lead. Our photos are delivered via a private gallery that you can delete afterwards on your end. We have had also many people asking us to delete the images from our hard-drives once the session was completed, and we just… do it. Don’t hesitate to ask questions prior to booking anything and if they aren't answered clearly, this is a red flag.

Everyone should try boudoir photography at least once in their life. There is a before and an after in this adventure, with many more perks that you wouldn't even think of. Take the leap, challenge yourself and you won't regret it.

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Let's talk about consent!

Guest post by Eden Wine - Mindset Consultant

 With the advent of the “Me Too” and “Times Up” era, we must learn the nuances of “Consent” so we can best equip ourselves to effectively navigate our relationships.

 
 

It’s time to create a clear definition of what consent means to us, and it’s important to:

  • understand our rights when it comes to giving and receiving consent;

  • solidify our true introspective understanding of our personal boundaries; and

  • learn about and respect how to best support other people’s boundaries. 

HOW MANY OF YOU HAVE ALLOWED YOUR BOUNDARIES TO BE CROSSED FOR THE PURPOSE OF PLEASing OTHERS OR IN THE ATTEMPT OF “FEELING BEAUTIFUL”? WELL I HAVE.

When I was 14, I suddenly became well endowed in the derriere department. Now, given the location of this development, I was completely unaware of its existence. I only came to know about my “ass-et” because of my male peers. When walking down the hallway of my high school, adorned in a school uniform, I was consistently greeted by unsolicited slaps, grabs, and fondles. I wasn’t even able to acknowledge this new part of my body before it was claimed by others and objectified. Since this was one of the first experiences I had in my developing body, I was trained to think that this behaviour was acceptable.

As a young teen, I was quickly learning that it was okay for me to be caressed without consent. This, however, is not true.

We, as humans, have exclusive rights to our own bodies.

It is our fundamental obligation to define boundaries for ourselves and to feel comfortable and assured when voicing such boundaries. We are not owned by anyone and no one is entitled to us or any part of us. In fact, the right we have to our own bodies is grounded in and protected by law.

HOW ARE OUR RIGHTS PROTECTED?

The Constitutions and Criminal Codes of many (if not most) developed countries have specific and designated laws that are geared towards protecting the sanctity of consent. Now, I’m no expert in the laws of the world at large, but I know Canada very carefully preserves the notion of consent into its legislation and case law. For example, section 273.1(1) of the Canadian Criminal Code dictates that sexual activity is ONLY legal when both parties consent and where “voluntary agreement” is obtained. Both parties means BOTH parties. In fact, the “two to tango” phraseology has never been more apropos. Sure, there will be nuances in courting and dating when flirting plays a role though subliminal and subtle body language, but that does not dismiss the importance of ensuring that BOTH parties are consenting and, even more than that, consenting the WHOLE time. 

LET’S THINK ABOUT AND DEFINE OUR BOUNDARIES AND RESPECT OTHER PEOPLE’S BOUNDARIES TOO! #PlatinumRule 

Consent is truly grounding yourself in your beliefs and saying “yes” when an activity  (any activity really) feels right without a shadow of a doubt. This could apply to any sexual encounter or even as something as simple as a hug.

For all people alike, the onus is on us to:

  • know and learn our boundaries;

  • feel secure and confident in our ability to voice our boundaries; and,

  • to inquire and respect other people’s boundaries. In the end, it is each of us who have exclusive rights to our own person and it is our obligation to protect such rights with the entirety of our being.

DISCLAIMER

Eden Wine is presently a non-practicing lawyer. She was called to the Ontario Bar in June 2018 and has since been a member of the Law Society of Ontario.

The content of this article is provided for general information purposes only and does not constitute legal or other professional advice or an opinion of any kind. Readers of this article are advised to seek specific legal advice by contacting independent legal counsel regarding any specific legal issues. Neither the author, nor Scandaleuse Photography warrant or guarantee the quality, accuracy or completeness of any information in this article or on Scandaleuse Photography’s website. The content of this article is current as of the original date of publication, and should not be relied upon as accurate, timely, or fit for any particular purpose.

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Grief, rediscovering yourself and newfound confidence

Back in 2019, we met the fabulous Hallae for one of our boudoir shoot and we had the pleasure to shoot with her 2 more times :)… It is always nice to take pictures of the same Scandal over the years and see their transformation!

A few years ago, she was interviewed by She Does The City to talk about how the loss of her mother shattered her; and how, amidst the grieving process, she’s had to devote time to rediscover herself. Hallae is such a badass human being and today we are super happy to share this interview with you 😁

 
curvy brunette woman in boudoir set up wearing black lingerie

2019 - Hallae first boudoir shoot with us!

 

How would you describe your sexuality?

After my mom’s death and the breakup of a long-term relationship shortly afterwards, I didn’t feel sexual at all. But then I saw my body in some Knixwear photos and saw the comments, and that broke down one barrier: my body wasn’t something to be ashamed of.

But there was a second barrier: my sexuality had been put on hold for so long. That was until I allowed myself to take the improv route and say yes to whatever this new particular sexual partner suggested. I trusted him, and I was scared, but I was ready to say yes again.

And now, I may be well over 200 pounds, but I can’t help but feel like the sexiest woman in any room. I feel like I’m nineteen again, when I wasn’t afraid to try anything.

I may be almost thirty, but I’m back at the Stag Shop asking all the questions and buying that full-body fishnet stocking. In short, my sexuality can be described in one word: renewed.  

 
Curvy pink hair woman in boudoir set up wearing lacey black lingerie and black gown

2021 - second fierce boudoir shoot :)

 

How did you feel at the beginning of the photo shoot?

To be honest, I had worked myself into quite the state prior to Juliette and Fanny’s arrival. The day before the shoot had actually been the two-year anniversary of my mom’s death, and part of the reason for having this the next day was to have a planned and almost concrete way to celebrate life. Well, you know what they say about the best-laid plans.

However, I can’t express how quickly my anxiety dissipated when Juliette and Fanny entered my apartment. I had pulled a bunch of pieces of clothing I stared at blankly; they quickly identified three outfits. By the time I had changed, they had moved around pillows and chairs and tables, and all of a sudden my little apartment felt worthy of a photo shoot. And soon thereafter, they made me feel worthy of this photo shoot. They directed and displayed poses and had such a contagious energy. I was fully into it only a few clicks into the first outfit.

double exposure photograph woman smoking in black bra and pink sweat pants. She has pink hair

2022 - Third session. We asked Hallae what sensuality meant to her. This was the result!

What were you thinking about while it was happening? Did you have a particular mantra running through your head?

I didn’t have a particular mantra (besides “shoulders back, tits out”), but I was thinking of power.

I remember sitting on the floor in just a leotard and staring at the camera and having this moment where I felt so much more powerful than I had just a few moments earlier. Sometimes confidence is something that comes naturally, but sometimes we’re thrust into situations that force us to uncork that confidence.

It’s not always possible. But before the shoot I decided I was going to at least try, and I did. That was powerful for me.

What do you want to say to people who are currently lacking confidence, or feeling insecure when it comes to their body/sexuality? 

It would be easy to look at my photos and think, “Wow, she must be so comfortable in her body.” But now you know the truth. I was freaking out up until the moment the photographers walked through the door. Part of me believes that finding confidence in your body is sometimes consciously acting to find it. I’m not saying go out right now and take pictures in your underwear, but that’s one way to do it.

No one can convince you your body is beautiful without a bit of work on your part. (Though I’m still here to tell you: it is.) Have you seen it in a teddy yet? What about covered in sparkles? Drape your body in whatever your kink is. Then stare at it in the mirror, take photos of yourself, wear it on a date, wear it on a solo dinner. When that person comes up to you and tells you your body is beautiful, think about how hot you fucking looked, and agree with them.

Feel it. Own it.

That’s what I’m talking about when I say act consciously. Then fuck the shit out of them, with consent, of course :)

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Breast Massage For Sexual Healing And Getting Your Libido Back

The following is a guest post by Katrin, from katrinwithlove.com and @vaginismus.sisters.

If life has inconveniently initiated you in any sort of sexual liberation journey, then we have a lot in common.

I personally experienced painful sex and the protective body response of vaginismus (rhymes with Christmas) – a bracing and tightening of my pelvic floor muscles that robbed me of pleasure-filled gifts for more than 6 years…

 
 

Whether your story was ridden in pain, shame, numbness or anywhere in between, you've probably read plenty about the vulva and vagina in the process of claiming your sexual freedom.

It’s true. The ancient sex wisdom of Taoism confirms the intricate connection between the genitals and optimal functions of other organs and glands in the body. Creating harmony in these sacred areas of your body really is important in relieving tension and support physical and emotional healing.

But what about the breasts?

What purpose do they serve in your complete body system for physical and emotional healing?

What role do they serve in increasing your libido if that's something that has subsided for one reason or another?

Many of us have grown up ashamed of our breasts. They may have been the reason we received unwanted and uncomfortable attention.. Or we may have regarded them as just a necessary part of our female anatomy (but nothing more than that).

I personally grew up having a fairly BLAH relationship with my breasts.

They were there and that's about it - if anything, I had a perception of what beautiful breasts should look like, and mine weren't quite them. So it's safe to say my relationship with my lady bumps was MEH at worst and "ooh they look great in a push up bra" at best!

Starting to pay loving attention to YOUR breasts is a crucial part of getting your libido back and finding success in your sexual liberation journey.

Emotionally and energetically, when you find unconditional love for your heart space and breasts, you can tap into that sense of self-love and inner confidence that may have been energetically laying dormant under your layers of shame and indifference.

Even still, a vulva owner's sexual turn on STARTS in the heart centre represented by the breasts, gets strengthened by the cooperation of the mind and only then is felt physically in the genitals.

So it becomes important to bring your heart-centred turn-on online!

How do you involve your beautiful breasts in a holistic approach to healing?

 
 

Physically, that looks like stimulating them gently through breast massage to enhance the health of your heart, blood, lymphatic and hormonal systems.

Awakening the life force of the body as a whole to create sexual aliveness and sex drive.

The Tao of Sexology - The Book of Infinite Wisdom by Dr. Stephen T. Chang confirms that:

"From foreplay to pregnancy to nursing, the breasts are closely tied to the genital system, through nervous impulses, hormones, etc.”

"The delicate intertwining of numerous capillaries, nerves, lactation glands, lymphatic vessels, and other delicate structures of the breast are easily damaged by improper handling.”

Any damage to breast tissue can lead to accumulations and blockages.

These can then lead to lumps or, possibly, cancer. (The breast is so delicate that caffeine can cause lumps and cysts to form inside the breast, as was shown in recent studies.) If this should ever happen, the entire female reproductive system would be torn out of balance.

Therefore, the sensitive and easily over-stimulated breasts must never be mishandled by the woman or her sexual partner. A woman's partner should never bite, suck, or pinch the breast. Contact should be limited to a very gentle caress or kiss.

Even though more intense handling of the breasts can be very pleasurable for certain people, Taoism states that, for optimal full body functionality, and especially reversing the damage that may have already been created in the breasts, a gentle approach is required...

Here is a simple and gentle breast massage ritual that you can engage in to create a loving relationship with your breasts...

…And to enjoy all the physical benefits that come with it!

 
 
  1. Ensure your space is free of distractions and feels safe so you can fully surrender and relax.

  2. Make your room nice and cozy in whichever way feels right to you and lie down comfortably with your shirt off.

  3. Warm up your hands by rubbing them together to promote blood flow and circulation. Have some massage oil nearby if you'd like, but don't use it just yet.

  4. Place your hands on your chest, fall into a comfortable rhythm breathing into your belly. With a loving intention, connect to your heart as your listen to your heartbeat.

  5. With your fingertips or nails, slowly and delicately start moving up and down your breasts, avoiding the nipples. This stimulates sensation on and beneath the skin, essentially waking them up.

  6. Now put some massage oil on your hands if you'd like.

  7. Press down on your armpit and release 5 times. This helps open and generate healthy flow in the lymphatic system.

  8. As you keep breathing and with one hand per breast, continue more thoroughly massaging the perimeter of the breasts. Then move to the full breasts and only then the nipples. Make sure you are applying some more pressure now so you are stimulating the deeper breast tissue along with the skin.

  9. Using one or both hands, move back and forth between breasts, creating movement across the mid-meridians of your body. This helps balance both hemispheres of your brain and create union between your masculine and feminine energies.

  10. As you are lightly and intuitively continue touching your breasts, remind them that they are worthy of receiving love and pleasure.

  11. After about 15 minutes or when you feel complete, come into a relaxed position and be present with whatever feelings arise from doing this exercise. You did it!

What did you notice? Did any feelings of shame, discomfort, or even suppressed memories come up?

If so, that's totally normal. They may have been part of your life for many years. With each breast massage practice, you'll become closer to fully allowing yourself to release the discomfort and make space for unconditional love and acceptance. You may even realize...

May the love for your body in its entirety bring you peace and a conscious awareness that ALL of YOU is beautiful!

Helpful tools

You can perform your breast massage ritual with your hands, or you can also incorporate the use of tools like soft fabrics, feather toys or tools using the healing characteristics of some of Mother Earth’s natural elements – crystals.

If the crystal option piqued your interest, it’s encouraged that you pick a crystal intuitively simply by feeling which one you’re naturally drawn to most. Where each type of crystal has a unique energetic property and vibration and therefore a unique subtle impact on your own energy body.

The crystal I felt called to use in my breast massage practice was fire quartz.

 
 

I later learned that fire quartz calms anxieties and brings clarity. Like with rose quartz, its nature is that it subtly inspires self-acceptance feelings of greater calm and comfort.

In the journey of reconnecting to your authentic eroticism, this can be incredibly helpful in reconnecting to a state of mental peace with yourself and your body.

When I used the crystal in my breast massage practice, I really enjoyed its firmness and the smooth, rounded shape. It felt like an added luxury to the kind of touch I could create on my body.

And still, there is something special about using your own hands in varied forms of touch, as well as feeling that skin-to-skin contact and connection. To me, a combination of hands and tools provides that variety that I’ve learned I crave in life (in all sorts of ways).

In any case, the invitation is to introduce a breast massage practice into your self-care and self-pleasure practices in any ways that feels right to you!

Look for any subtle nudge that helps you feel the pleasure of sinking into a slow-paced and gentle experience, which of course can always naturally turn into a passionate and intense one..

Of course, the intention is that you feel that deep appreciation for a part of your body that you may have been disregarding for years.

Here’s to the love your breasts deserve!

- Katrin, with Love

 
 

The parts of you who desire a life based in liberation, love and leadership can find a home in Katrin’s world..

As a sexual liberation mentor who has overcome painful sex and continues to support women in releasing the protective body response of vaginismus, Katrin has a deep understanding of how survival strategies of the mind and subtle protective mechanisms of the body can sneakily keep you from feeling like the incredible woman you are!

Katrin believes that your power is born out of your deepest pain and that the Liberated & In Love Woman within you already has all the answers to guide you in your personal reclamation in the realms of sex, love, relationships and entrepreneurship.. She is here to love you as you re-discover your unique signature of play, pleasure and purpose. She gently calls you into your zone of genius and lifts you up as you bravely build your legacy from that place of aliveness and erotic overflow.

You can find her life’s work on her website katrinwithlove.com and on Instagram @katrin.with.love and @vaginismus.sisters

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Personal story - the search for the perfect birth control method

Disclaimer: In this post I am talking about my own experience and feedback about birth control methods. I am not a doctor and this should not be considered as legal advice. You should seek appropriate counsel for your own situation.

Today we are back with a blog on a more personal topic: birth control methods. If you have been following us for a while, you know that we love to talk about our life’s experiences on topics people don’t necessarily talk about. We believe that talking about those things are a great way to remove the unnecessary pressure and clichés that surround them.

It ain't a walk in a park!

Fanny writing today by the way! In 2018, I was sharing with you why I decided to stop taking the birth control pill and switch to a non-hormonal copper IUD (the Intrauterine Device is a small piece of flexible plastic shaped like a T that's put into your uterus to prevent pregnancy. It’s long-term, reversible, and one of the most effective birth control methods out there). Both Juliette and I tried it but we had different experiences. You can read Juliette’s opinion on the IUD here!

Even if I think it is much better than the pill, I unfortunately had to remove mine last year. In my opinion, the IUD is an amazing birth control method and I wish more people were using it. It can last from 3 to 10 years depending of the brand, it is more affordable than pill, and once it is inserted you have nothing to do beside checking every year it didn’t move. But it is not for everyone!

Let’s start by the beginning: the insertion. I have a good pain tolerance but the insertion was painful! My family doctor was the one to insert it and instead of opening the T part at once, she did in 3 or 4 times which made it extremely painful for me. I spent the rest of the day feeling unwell which is very common: strong cramps, headaches, and I also felt nauseous for a few hours.

The first year was ok-ish beside the fact I got a strong acne and had my real period (when you take the pill, your periods are “regulated”. You lose less blood, they are usually shorter, and less painful). But the longer I kept the IUD the more intense the cramping were, to a point that I almost passed out several times. It was also weird for me to have this foreign object in my body and I always had the impression I could feel it. Move forward 2022, I took the decision to remove it even though I had one year left. I could tell it wasn’t the right birth control method for me and since I wasn’t dating anyone it was the perfect moment to stop the process.

 
 

Now what?

I have been birth control free for a year now and I really enjoy it. But I am ready to date again and since I do not want to have any kids, I have to find a new one on top of using condoms. Unfortunately, my options are getting limited: I do not want to take any hormones, and I don’t wanna go back with an IUD. If you are wondering what other choices I have, here are the two options I am thinking of:

  • Fertility awareness such as tracking my ovulation period using tools like my basal body temperature, or cervical mucus. I feel very excited to try this out but it also stresses me a lot. I love the idea of going natural and learning more about my body, but if it is not done properly then the chance of getting pregnant increases 😟

  • Tubal removal procedure. This is an irreversible birth control method in which both of the fallopian tubes are being completely removed. This would be perfect for me since you cannot get pregnant with this surgery. The only thing that makes me think twice about it is that, depending of the person, it can make the period more painful than they usually are.

I already started to get information about this procedure. I talk to my family doctor first but she wasn’t very supportive and told me it is not something that is usually done in Canada. But I insisted so she sent me to see a gynaecologist and to my surprise she didn’t give me a hard time nor try to make me give up on the idea. I have read online that many doctors are against this surgery (unless you already had plenty of kids), because it is permanent and they have a hard believing people who say they don’t want children. I was ready to fight for my rights and the control over my own body but didn’t have to. She of course had to make sure I understood it is irreversible, but since I am very set in stones with that decision, and told her I was having a hard time finding the perfect birth control method, she put me on a waiting list to get that procedure done. Which gives me the time to do more researches!

Also the fact that my family doctor lied to me a little with her statement saying it is not common for people to do that here in Canada made me a tad angry. I can see why a lot of people are having a hard time finding doctors who respect their medical decision.

I have learned a lot about the tubal removal procedure and will probably write another blog to talk more about it.

We hope you enjoy this type of content! Even if those of blogs are not directly related to our work as boudoir photographers, it is an important part of who Juliette and I are, and the values we share. We make it a priority to be authentic, and we truly believe that if people were to talk more often about their everyday struggles and experiences, there will be less taboos around important topics and the world would be a better place!

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How to prep for your boudoir shoot

Congrats, you did it! You gathered the courage to book your boudoir shoot and now, the official preparation can officially begin! While it can be a little nerve-wracking, prepping for your shoot is very exciting and a big part of how confident and comfortable you will feel during your session. Here are some tips to help you get ready both for your mind and your body.

On the mindset side of things

 
 

Chances are, you are already in a "screw it, let's do this” mindset if you already booked your session, but if it was a little quiet, it's time to make it roar! Don't let your pre-shoot jitters take over and remind yourself of your "no f.. given” attitude. This is your time to let loose and have fun!

Leave your body alone!

More often than not, we hear "I need to lose/gain a few pounds before my shoot”. This is not the right way to go about it.

If you want to take advantage of this session to get a good balance in your life and feel your best, like managing your stress, set up better nutrition habits and movement and improve your sleep, all the power to you. But if you are going to kill yourself at the gym in hopes to change your body, you are setting yourself up for failure.

Let's say you do manage to trim or bulk up in time, chances are you will go back to your regular self shortly after your session. Getting your photos might get you excited at first, but after a little while, you may not feel so good about them and end up comparing your body then and now.

Your photos are meant to be a keep sake, a long-term reminder of how beautiful and confident you are, in your every day body. Just let your body be and place your focus other aspect of your session, like what oufits make you feel your best.

Choose your outfits carefully

When selecting outfits for your boudoir shoot, choose pieces that you feel comfortable and confident in. Don't be afraid to mix and match different pieces to create a unique and personalized look. We can do up to 5 outfits in one session, and we definitely encourage you to have different vibes to illustrate different facets of your personality.

They don't have to be regular lingerie either! Any outfit can be turned into a boudoir one, and we will help you style it as such.

 
 

Practicing posing can help

Even if it isn't your job to know what to do in front of the camera and that we will guide you through it all, it can be helpful to practice some poses at home in front of a mirror.

Don't worry too much about it, but don't be scared to experiment just a little, check some poses and angles you might like. It will make you feel more confident once you are in front of the lens.

A few extra quickies before we end this…

Prep a playlist

Music has a huge influence on our moods, so definitely make yourself a playlist of songs that make you feel sexy & confident!

Watch those tan lines!

Bad tan lines can really ruin a look and are pretty much impossible to remove properly in post-production. If you are planning on hitting the beach before your shoot, make sure to either use sunblock or sunbathe au naturel…

Gather some inspo

Whether it is for makeup, outfits or poses, don't hesitate to fall into a Pinterest rabbit hole and save anything that catch your eye. Dismiss the perfect bodies and poses and just focus on the whole ambiance of the shot. It is so nice to get inspired with other looks and for us, it is helpful to see where you head is at!

Follow those little tips & tricks and we guarantee you'll have the best session ever! We have plenty more tips & tricks that we share with all of our new clients and we are always happy to answer any questions. If you would like to connect, head over to this link!

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