Wandering on the internet, we came accross a fellow boudoir photographer asking for feedback regarding to one of her client’s session. Then, we saw something in the comment section that left a bit surprised:
We've written about our editing process about how, while we can remove anything that’s temporary (like pimples), we have personally chosen not to change bodies, edit scars, birthmarks, and other little things that make you, you. But that's just us.
In fact, many women actually don't post anything online before (heavily) editing it.
Hold on while we get our nice and shiny red flag.
Holding on to an edited picture of yourself may feel good in the short-term, but you're not doing yourself a favor on the long-run.
Here is why:
1) Hiding the real you is not gonna help you appreciate who you are.
The more filters and editing you use, the more you get accustomed to seeing yourself with them. Except we don’t have them in real life.
They’re not on your mirror, they’re not here when you are having a rough day. People don't see you with them. After getting used to apply filters everywhere, you feel like you created a physically “better” version of yourself and this ends up clouding your vision.
a simple reflection in the mirror could absolutely shatter your self-esteem since your notion of reality around your appearance is not accurate anymore.
On top of that, chances are you’re gonna have a rough time, as you get older, to get used to the changes your body and face will have. Those are inevitable and with the habit of editing everything, you could fall into a rabbit hole of self-loathing.
2) You may use the “edited you” as a standard to compare yourself.
It is very common to refer to old photos of ourselves and compare them with what we look like now. Sometimes, it's already not a very nice thought process, if you think you were “better” then.
With time, the memories blend in together. If you apply some edits, even smooth, on every pictures of yourself, you may forget to what extend you did and look back at those wondering why you “don’t look as good as you did then'‘. Except you'd be referring to something that isn't real to begin with.
3) By heavily editing your images, you are adding to the problem you are a victim of.
It is not news that the media has been spreading images edited beyond anything real. But it is not only media anymore, since it has become so easy to do it ourselves.
If you are a fellow user of those intense editing apps, you are contributing to the myth that bodies and faces have to be perfect.
There begins the vicious cycle:
Let’s be honest, you are editing yourself to look like other edited women who look perfect despite not being real. Other women in your circles might compare themselves to you and tweak their images to look as “perfect” as you do. And it keeps going. So not only aren’t you doing yourself a favor, but you are not doing other's a favor either.
So, how to get out of this editing hell?
1) Protect yourself from perfect-looking content.
Unfollow the accounts that shows exclusiely perfect bodies, skins and so on. None of these are real. Skin has pores, rolls, cellulite, hair, blemishes, wrinkles… That's the reality and it is A-OKAY! Replace them with positive accounts, showing the real deal (like ours ehehe). You will then train your eyes again to see the beauty in reality, which will spread on your beautiful self.
The more you remove those fake images around you, the more you will bring your notion of reality back to a healthy level.
2) Show the real you.
It may sound harsh, but the only way to break this cycle is to show the real you. Ditch the filters. Remove the editing.
You have the power to help yourself and other women by simply showing reality.
Of course, you don't have to show yourself straight out of bed, first day of your period, with something on your teeth! Just keep it simple.
There is nothing to be ashamed about your real face and body. There is nothing wrong with you.
By showing the real deal, you are saying “stop” to this unnecessary pressure around appearance. You are giving yourself the chance to exist in your own way. And that leads to more room to focus on who you are and who you want to become. Be a part of this positive movement, for yourself, but also for others! We can't really do it without you.