Men, boudoir & body image

The boudoir industry has been more appealing to women since its creation. Very likely because it is a field that helps you get in touch with your body, your sensuality, and your femininity. Does that mean that men are excluded?

Absolutely not.

The men body and the body-positive movement

First of all, we are deeply convinced that everyone would appreciate a tasteful and beautiful image of themselves in the nude, whether they keep it private or not. It is the ultimate confidence booster after all.

Yet, while women can now enjoy the body-positive movement in some media and thus, feel more and more included and surrounded with less edited and more real images (yay!), men are stuck with the perfect Calvin Klein model with a 6-pack.

It is just extremely rare to see normal-looking men in the media.

In order to dig a bit more, we went directly to the source and asked the men in our community how they felt about all of this. Darius stated:

“Media & fashion has an enormous influence on how men see their bodies. That even starts in childhood - look at all the comic books, where every superhero is muscular hunky macho man, with strong facial features and sulky expressions. Toys like 'Action Man' and similar also portray certain image of the man. When you grow up, popular image of the movies or cartoons or commercials is of a boy who is athlete, again certain physique attributed to that.”

Women grew up with Barbie's unachieVable body type, but men also grew up with perfect looking action figures. Except Barbie's looks are becoming less and less relevant everyday.

Men VS body issues

It is pretty common for women to express themselves about their body-image. Not that the way it is done is always healthy, but at least, we can have open conversation a lot more easily than our men friends.

If anything, talking about men body-issues is still seen as not-manly, weak, frivolous & even laughable. Great supportive environment, right?

As Mike said:

“Guys struggle with self image quite a bit too but because we aren't (openly) judged on it as much as women, it's more of a quiet struggle. Then again, the amount of guys I know with back problems and knee braces, relocated hair and the inevitable "dad bod" is further down the wish list... the older guys get, the more they just want their body to work like it used to!”

To this day, the clichés around masculinity are still going strong. And they won't go anywhere until more men open up about this, just like women are doing (the difference though is that you have more chances to be listened to and supported than we are, but that's another story!)

So, gentlemen, what benefits could boudoir give you?

1) BOOST YOUR CONFIDENCE by challenging yourself

A boudoir shoot is a challenge by itself. It is vulnerable & sets you out of your comfort zone. But what happens when you step out of your comfort zone? You grow and develop confidence. And this spreads in every area of your life. We can guarantee that you will leave this experience with a confidence boost if you try it.

2) Appreciate your body the way it is

By having a professional boudoir shoot down, you will be given the opportunity to see your body in a flattering way, the way it really is. And this feeling also leads to a healthy and strong personal growth.

3) Get in touch with your feminine side (no it doesn't mean you’re gay!)

Every single human being has both a feminine and masculine side. Women tap into their masculine side constantly (even too much in our current society, but again, that's another topic), so why couldn't you tap into your feminine one? Your feminine side is a huge asset in your life. It keeps you grounded and helps you simply enjoy what is around you. You become more aware of what all of your senses are picking up, it helps you develop new perspectives and creativity. It's a win-win for you and your loved ones!

4) Bring down the pressure around men body-image.

The more regular-looking men we will see around, the more normal it will become, just like it is happening for women. But it has to start somewhere, and it is in your power to demolish those beauty standards by simply showing reality. You won't be only be doing yourself a favor, you will also do one for your fellas too.

5) Break the toxic masculinity

By trying such a vulnerable experience and coming out feeling just good about yourself, you will slowly but surely remove the clichés attributed to men such as “don’t cry, be strong, suck it up, don't be girlie” and so on.

You got the idea, a boudoir shoot will simply give you the chance to feel good about yourself. It is a gift from you, to you. So Why prevent yourself from enjoying an experience like this?

Bridal Boudoir

For our Scandals who are getting married, have you heard about bridal boudoir?

It sounds like just a detail to add to your endless to-do list, less important than shoes, flowers and the other millions tasks you need to take care of. As a result, boudoir shots are either overlooked or done very quickly the morning of your wedding if you or your photographer remembers.

WHY NOT TAKE MORE TIME AND BOOK YOUR BRIDAL BOUDOIR SESSION BEFORE YOUR WEDDING DAY?

BRIDAL BOUDOIR = PRETTY NEAT YOU TIME

Let's face it: wedding planning can be very stressful. From finding the best venue to the problematic seating chart (you know, uncle George having a feud with aunt Roberta while your 14-year-old cousin would rather die than sit at the kids table...), it feels like there is no ending.

That's why we believe every bride should take one day to take care of herself and relax: spa, massage, karate class (everyone has their own way to calm down!). A boudoir session can definitely join that list of cool stuff. It's a great way to have fun and think about you and only you.

HERE ARE 4 REASONS WHY YOU SHOULD DO A BOUDOIR SESSION BEFORE YOUR WEDDING:

1) YOU'VE ALWAYS WANTED TO DO IT.

Secretly or not, we are 99% sure this is something you've been curious about. What's better than using the fact that you are getting married as a reason to finally do it?

2) YOU'RE GOING TO FEEL LIKE A BAD-ASS

You will definitely leave your shoot feeling like Beyonce. We see it with all of our clients: they first come excited and a little shy, they leave rocking that pavement like it's a cat walk, with their hair is slow-motion. That's exactly what you need. And we all love Beyonce.

3) YOUR PARTNER WILL JUST LOVE IT.

Just picture your partner's blushing face and adorable smile when he/she will see your photos. There is something so special about giving this gift to the love of your life.

4) YOU ARE GOING TO BUY EXPENSIVE LINGERIE/VEIL FOR YOUR BIG DAY.

Might as well make it count. That pair of cute panties you bought for the night of deserves more.

You can even involve your partner for a couple boudoir shoot if you want to try something unique, he/she also needs to relax, in a romantic way...

INDOORS OR OUTDOORS?

Most of the time, it is done indoor,s usually at the bride’s home, friend or family house or in an hotel room. But because we love to offer you something different, your session can be done in beautiful lofts: from bohemiam artsy to moderm minimalist, it's your choice!

If you feel adventurous, we can take you for an outdoor session. Depending of the weather and your taste, a boudoir shoot can be done in a beautiful garden, in the forest, on the beach, in the water or in even the street, for creative and beautiful images.

ONLY ME, MYSELF & I?

This is totally up to you. Some women like to do it by themselves, others feel more comfortable with someone they know. If you feel like sharing this wonderful experience, here are some ideas:

• With your partner: Such a great way to bring your relationship to another level of intimacy. Bring your lover and a bottle of wine, we vow to create a romantic atmosphere.

• With your bridesmaids: those sessions are so much fun and can be very creative. You just need to bring your girls, your lingerie and props and some drinks (yes a bottle of wine works here too) and we are good to go!

WHAT SHOULD I WEAR?

You decide what is the most comfortable for you and the vibe you have in mind. Here are few tips to help you started:

• Classic: white lingerie, veil, garter  and bouquet

• Fancy: corset or bodysuit, lace, stockings and heels

• Natural: simple lingerie, oversize sweaters, knee socks, light makeup and barefoot

THOSE ARE JUST LITTLE TIPS, FEEL FREE TO MIX AND MATCH IDEAS, WEAR COLORS, BRING JEWELRY OR GO FULL NUDE. THERE ARE NO RULES, LET YOUR IMAGINATION DO THE WORK!

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5 reasons to spend more time in adult stores

Sexy Sunday talk: Sex shops! I am pretty sure most of you have been to an adult store before, if not then it’s okay, you probably will after reading this.

The first time in an adult shop is like the first time you make love. It is confusing, we don’t really know where to go, what we can touch… So yeah, not the best experience. Like sexuality, you need to practice to make it feel better and be more confident about it.

It's very likely you will end up doing what 99% of people do: go once, feel weird and you won't try again because you will just rehash that first experience. I personally do not go often, but when I do, I aim for the classy and friendly ones.

Before giving you the reasons why you should embrace your curiosity and take this step, let me tell you about my first time there... when I was 4. Yes, you read right. I actually had to ask my mother to remind me this story, as you know, your memory is not the sharpest at that age.

My mom, my godmother and the four-year-old me were walking downtown Paris, in les Halles area (if you're familiar with Paris!) after our casual Toy Story moving outting. We turned into a street full of sex stores and peep-shows at that time. Because I was very curious, I could not stop asking my mom about those “shops”. She thought it would be a good idea (because of Toy Story) to tell me they were selling toys for adults. Oh mom...

I was just staring at the windows, while my mom and godmother were talking. And suddenly, I just crawled under the curtain (for people who never been to les Halles, lots of those peep-shows don’t have entrance doors per se but velvet curtains instead).

My mom had to go in, get me out and the young salesman was too surprised to catch me while I was running towards the dildos. It was such an awkward moment for the clients who ended up leaving the store because they felt too embarassed to stay. Talk about cockblock.

It took only 2 minutes to my mom to take me out not without bumping into a gentleman going in. He became as red as a tomato and pretended he was going in the wrong store.

I apparently created a big mess that day!

I went back years later with my friends, when I was a teenager. I have lots a great memories about laughing and making jokes at the products.

Here are 5 reasons to spend more time in sex stores:

An other world

I am always amazed to see the diversity of products you can find for sexuality and desire. It is open for all level, either you are looking for something sensual or erotic: massage oils, dildos or silicone vagina, you will find something for you. They have amazing and high quality pieces, like those colorful glass sex toys, they are captivatingly beautiful.

Body-positivity

Sex stores are part of this category of few places where you are free to be yourself. No judgement and everybody is welcome: young adults to older people, women and men, straight or LGBTQ community… No one cares about the way you look or your career, the money you have or the places you are going to. 

Educational

Believe it or not, you can learn very interesting things. Lots of sex shops organize different workshops, from learning how to do a blowjob to communicating your desires to your partner or even getting prepared with your next challenge (being half naked in front of a camera) with a boudoir photography workshop. Oh wait, the last one is done by us!

Personally, I found pretty interesting ones like: “Bigger, better, multiples: orgasms for every body” or “compassionate communication: crossing the bridge to connection”. If you feel attracted by those workshops, Good for Her has great ones.

Amazing lingerie

Oh ladies, the lingerie they have is marvelous and so tasteful.  I am in love every time I am going in a sex shop. Bras, panties, bodysuits, jumpsuits, tights, stockings, thongs, sexy, fancy, with straps, lace, leather… Disneyland for women! Prices are affordable and you have lots of choice.

Great people

Why are adult stores great? Not just because of the products they have but also because of the people who work in those places: open minded, professional, friendly and knowledgeable. They will guide you, answer your questions, show you the new arrivals and make you have a great experience. But no worries if you prefer to not talk to anybody, they will leave you alone.

The time of creepy and crappy places is over! We love clean and friendly stores.  For our scandals who live in Toronto, BlogTo did a great article about the best Sex Shops in town.

It is now your turn to tell us your first experience or best memory from those adult stores!

With love