How to look like yourself during your boudoir shoot

We have heard many times of the years “those photos were nice, but they just didn't look like me”. Maybe because of too much editing. Maybe because it was the wrong vibe. It happens even more often in boudoir photography, where we are still facing the (wrong) assumption that bodies need to look perfect since clothes aren't in the picture.

It's not a great feeling to not recognize yourself on an image. Here is why:

Photography's purpose is not just about creating art. It's to evoke emotions of any kind.

When you are booking any type of shoot for yourself, it is very likely because you want to see yourself from another perspective and keep a memory of it. If you can't recognize yourself in a picture, you become totally neutral about it or worse, have negative feelings towards it. Chances are you may look at the photo for a day or 2, before hiding it somewhere because it just “doesn't feel right".

So, how can you look like YOU during your boudoir shoot?

1) Pick the right makeup, if any.

Makeup is fascinating. You can be so creative with it and change your face's features. It is often encourage on photoshoots to wear some to get camera ready or just to have fun and get pampered, but it doesn't mean you have to get it done in a way that is drastically different from what you would usually do. It doesn’t even mean that you have to get your makeup done at all! Many of us don't wear any, if this is your case, feel free to keep it this way.

Of course, working with a makeup artist is also the opportunity to try something different, and if you want to experiment, go for it! But if you want to look like yourself, see it as a way to get a professional version of your own makeup.

Having a clear vision of the makeup you picture yourself with is very helpful to not feel like a stranger,

2) Prepare outfits that make you feel amazing.

Boudoir isn't just about the classic lingerie set, far from it!

Any outfit can be turned into a boudoir one, you just have to remove some layers.

If you feel like a garterbelt and stockings isn't like you, take your favourite style and remove some layers! Loose tshirts with cute panties, a pair of jeans topless, a silky robe, bralette and skirt, possibilities are endless, so have fun with it!

3) Don't overthink poses

When it comes to posing, the simplier, the better!

It's great to feel inspired by some poses you see online but attempting to copy them exactly might not work. One pose can look very different on 2 different bodies. However, poses can be adapted to your body type so they still looks badass, effortless, and flattering. Don't hesitate to ask your photographer, we personally love getting inspiration photos from our clients and adjust the poses depending on them.

Definetely not the easiest to pull off!

4) Try it at home

Practice makes perfect! Observing ourselves, taking our own images, trying on different outfits and poses in front of the mirror… All of these are very helpful to see what you look like when you feel like yourself. That way, you will feel comfortable quicker in front of a lens and will know what works for you.

If you feel like getting the hang of it solo before turning to a pro, check out our online boudoir guide*! It is the perfect tool to learn to style and pose yourself in different settings, in the comfort of your own home.

*its price is 100% redeemable on a photoshoot with us too!

5) Turn to a pro and make sure you feel seen

For us, the goal of boudoir is not for you to adapt to the clichés but for us to adapt to you. Sensuality is expressed in many different way, and yours is just as valuable as any. The more you feel understood prior to your session, the more you will feel like yourself on the final photos. You don't need to have specific ideas, just don't be afraid to ask questions, share what inspires you, even if you think it is all over the place. We will piece it together with you.

Don’t forget to not take yourself seriously or put pressure on yourself. A boudoir shoot is such an empowering and beautiful experience, you won’t regret trusting the process!

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How To Be Your Most Magnificent-Self

We were very tempted to write “badass-self” because for us it has such a powerful meaning. But apparently the definition of BADASS is not super positive, so let’s go with MAGNIFICENT!

It is no secret that when you feel confident about yourself, you achieve more and are less afraid to do things in general. Wouldn’t be amazing to be able to put our self-doubt in the garbage and feel confident all the time? Hell yes!

You build confidence by being and doing!

Confidence comes in waves, and it takes practice to keep it up. It follows our emotions and gets triggered every time we face failures, disappointments, and frustration. On top of that, the media and people can also make our confidence drops if we pay too much attention to the external noises (*cough: people’s judgment).

To avoid those negative feelings and make sure you stay confident in your life, you have to live it by your own rules and make sure you stay true to yourself (it’s time to stop being a people pleaser, for example). If you are thinking:

“Ok ladies, you are right in theory, but all of this sounds vague to me. How do you stay authentic when you are not sure of who you are or what you want to begin with?!”.

We get that feeling of confusion as we have been there. And honestly, it still happens now and then because Juliette and I never really settle for an easy and quiet life. The more you experience life, the more you grow, therefore you constantly reevaluate who you are. It can be tiring, but is always exhilarating.

Even if those self-discovery journeys are very personal, we want to share with you what have been working for us so far and the values that we think are important in order to stay authentic to ourselves:

Stop fearing what people think of you!

Let’s start with this, as this is the most common reason that stops people from being themselves: others.

There are two things you need to understand, and we wish someone had told us that when we were teenagers… It would have changed a lot of things for Juliette and me:

• People will always judge you. It doesn’t matter how you dress up, if you are a good or a bad person, what you do for a living, or how you live your life, someone will always disagree with your choices. It is IMPOSSIBLE TO PLEASE EVERYONE.

• People project their own limits on you. How many times have people told you you will never be able to make one of your dream come true? Many times right! They don’t believe you can make it because they cannot do it themselves. Their opinion of you is based on their own experiences, limits, fears, and failures.

Isn’t it mind-blowing? This is why what people think of you is not important. You will never be happy if you let people dictate your life.

Don’t take life too seriously!

Who said that because we are adults we cannot let our inner child out and play without worrying of what others will think? It is sad to want to do something but stop ourselves from doing it because it is not proper or acceptable as an adult.

We say “fuck it!”. Dance like nobody is watching, go twirl under the rain, laugh and cry, make noises or a little dance when you eat something delicious, believe in fairies and mermaids if you want to…

Having a huge imagination and being silly doesn’t make you less of an adult, but it will for sure make you feel more relax and happier.

via GIPHY

Do things that make you feel proud of yourself…

… and don’t hide it from others (yes, even if you are afraid those activities are inappropriate for your age, gender, or profession).

As boudoir photographers, we hear it often from our clients who do a shoot but don’t want to show their pictures to anyone in case people might think it is too sexy or slutty. No one has the right to judge when it comes to personal choices and preferences.

So go take those sexy pictures, the pole dance class you have been dreaming of, or go buy that outfit that is calling your name even though it is too short, colourful, or sparkly.

As long as you feel good about it, it is all that matters!

Embrace your beautiful-self!

And learn to love your body the way it is! See your body as your friend and stop throwing hate at it. We, women especially, are too focused on the part of our body we don’t like:

“Ugh, I wish I could be thinner, curvier, have more boobs/butt, could change my nose, or be taller, …”

All of this hatred is exhausting! Wouldn’t be better to be able to find ourselves beautiful all the time, instead of worrying of what we look like just because we believe those old school (and BS) beauty standards?

Well, it is about really wanting to love our body and changing the perception we have of ourselves.

Set boundaries with others!

Some people are really good at feeding on your willingness to listen and care for them. When you let them do so, you end up feeling exhausted, overwhelmed, and physically distressed.

You have the right to say no, stop, and/or cut people out of your life if necessary.

This topic deserves a full article, so here is a fascinating blog that will help you set boundaries up. It also works with people who judge you, tell you how you should live your life, or even for your professional life if you feel you deserve a raise or have been asked to do too much for your position.

This is a really hard process, but damn, when you manage to do it, it feels amazing and removes a lot of pressure off your shoulders.

Like we said, it is a personal journey, but we hope those tips will help you to discover your badass-self 😎. And as usual, do not hesitate to share with us in comment if there is anything else you want to add!

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Why you should challenge yourself with lingerie photos

Boudoir photography is definitively an art, a beautiful way to use light, framing and background composition to highlight the human body. But it also has a very much underestimated therapeutic purpose. Most of the people who finally dare to book their boudoir shoot are usually looking for more than a regular portrait session.

Seeing your body, for real.

When was the last time you actually looked at yourself naked or even in your underwear? And I mean, reaaaally look at yourself, not a quick glimpse before hopping in the shower? Rare are the people actually doing it, us included.

The human body, especially the woman one, is taboo. Nobody at school teaches us to truly love ourselves the way we are. If anything, we are taught to hide it and, in the worst cases, to be ashamed of it. Only a minority of people know every inch of their body even for the parts that are the most intimate.

On top of that, we focus so much on its physical aspect that we tend to forget our bodies are shells that actually makes us human beings to begin with. And that is something to cherish and treat well.

Being able to see your body from different angles, posed beautifully in a stunning environment, surrounded by a warm light is a rare opportunity you shouldn't pass on. Hell, even from the back, because seriously, we never get to see ourselves from the back!

It is not just about getting pretty photos.

Treating yourself to a boudoir adventure will take you out of your comfort zone, while still being in a safe environment. You can experiment something quite vulnerable in an intimate setting, which gives you the chance to fully let go and reap the benefits for your mind but also your attitude.

There is a visible before and after a boudoir session, mostly due to posture. This may sound frivolous but our posture truly says a lot about how we are feeling and the image we give to the world. For example, people tend to start their session curled up, shoulders down, trying to take the least space possible. By the end of it, they've learn to stand straighter, taller and own the room they're in. Even breathing feels easier. This translates into pure confidence inside and out and it sticks with you.

Because you managed to push yourself through something new, faced some fears and you succeeded, this freshly unlocked confidence spreads on everything around you too.

We are not saying that based on our own beliefs. We are saying it because you shared your stories with us. Many of you made substantial life changes following their boudoir experience: they went for a better job, a new challenge, ended toxic relationships… They move forward on things that used to terrify them.

And then the magic happens…

The hardest part is officially booking. Once it is in motion, your “f*ck it” attitude will take over and the fun stuff officially begins.

You can go shopping for new lingerie or dust off some outfits you love and never had the occasion to wear. You can brainstorm makeup & hair ideas with our makeup artist. You can gather inspiration online and let your imagination run wild to see which versions of yourself you will truly embody.

Then you go with the flow. You will see that the shoot jitters will pass within 10 minutes in your session. Before you know it, you would have rocked so many of your looks and vibes, that you don't even have time to ask yourself if you're good enough and let your insecurities get in the way. And we all know how nice it is when we can shut those nasty inner voices full of self-doubt!

The big finale: your photo results.

Now that you've completed the experience and connected with the badass you are, it's time you get the concrete proof by seeing your photos! It's with a heart racing that you will sit in front of our screen, in front of yourself, (re)discovering this version of you that was here all along but didn't get to shine as much as it should.

Your photos are a keepsake of it all, an anchor when you feel like you lost touch with this version of yourself. The pride you will feel looking at them is indescribable.

Now, the real question is: are you ready to start your boudoir journey?

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Should I keep my pictures private?

A lot of people are hesitant about doing a boudoir shoot because they do not really know how they will be using their pictures. Some can't imagine sharing them and the idea of other people seeing their photographs is sailing away the boudoir shoot boat, no matter how bad they want to try it..

Online sharing or not online sharing

If there is one main takeaway from this blog post, it is this: the choice of posting your photos online is yours and only yours. Not your partner. Not your family. Not your friends. Just yours. If it makes you feel good and safe to share them, just go ahead. On the other hand, if your desire is to keep those pictures private, then it is your right, no question asked.

That being said, we do encourage sharing your pictures with at least your loved ones and here is why:

Because you are also a source of inspiration to the people close to you.

You might think that only those massive influencers have an impact online, but we all get even more impacted by the people from our intimate circle. If someone we know does something we find inspiring, it will definitely make a long-lasting impression on us.

With your photos, you have the opportunity to inspire your loved ones, near or far. And we are not just talking about boudoir! Your showing that you've done something outside of your comfort zone will likely spark a fire for someone else to do the same.

It works with strangers too. If you only knew the amount of new Scandals who told us the reason they reached out was because they saw someone they could relate to on our page. How does it feel to be someone else's muse?! 

Breaking the code of unachievable beauty standards.

It's no secret that the media constantly promotes unachievable beauty standards. Even though we have seen some improvement, there is still a long way to go, and many more people left feeling like absolute garbage when staring at themselves in front of the mirror.

By sharing your photos, you are sharing what a body is really like. With the skin details, the little rolls, the curves, the bumps. THIS is how we break the mold. The more we can identify with who they see in the media, the less shame and pressure we will feel. And if we wait for the media to fix this for us, we are going to be here a while. The ball is in our court!

Being proud of yourself.

Hey, you did something outside the box, something many people would never dare to do. You left feeling great about yourself and ready to get familiar with this freshly discovered confidence. It is an achievement, and sharing achievements feels good. Toot your own horn for a minute (or two)!

The satisfaction of going against the grain.

This is more personal gain, but we can all agree that one of the best feelings ever is to be a bit rebellious. Yes, you know what we mean! Doing something that's generally frown upon for no reason at all…. It is so damn liberating and it leaves us wanting more. Just give yourself that satisfaction already!

Never forget that You can be a beautiful source of inspiration to someone you wouldn't expect and that you can provoke changes, even if it is just in your immediate surroundings.

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5 mistakes to avoid when taking your sexy pictures

Raise your hand if you have ever wanted to take a spicy photo of yourself and ended up struggling and feeling frustrated and awkward? Yep, been there, done that.

Don't get us wrong, of course you should book a boudoir session with a professional (aka us!). But if you're feeling a little adventurous and are dying to experiment a little bit by yourself with your beloved cellphone, here are a few common mistakes you can avoid.

1) Too low or too high is never flattering.

This is the main mistake we see when people are taking selfies, they tend to either hold their phone very high above their heads, or very low. Framing your shot with your phone slightly higher than your eye line can be a good idea, to make you look a little thinner, (and show the goods!), but don't put it up completely or you will look like your head is 5 times bigger than the rest of your body. 

Low angles are honestly the devil. Even us as professionals use extreme precautions before considering it. The perspective will be distorted, you will have a double chin no matter what you do. Unless you are mastering the art of low angle, ditch it!

2) Is that your dirty laundry in the background?

I don't know about you, but every time I see a selfie, I am always checking the background. Because God knows I have seen hilarious things there: toilet, food, people (!!), your dog humping a cushion, you name it!

Be mindful of what is behind you, you can have the best body in the world, if there is even the slightest toilet paper roll in that bottom right corner, your beautiful work is ruined.

3) You're not a contortionist and it's okay

Keep your posing simple. No need to put your leg behind your head, wraps your arms in an uncomfortable position you would never do in reality. All you need is to straighten your back, ideally arch it just a bit to bring the girls up, roll your shoulders out and balance your weight on one hip. Boom done. Leave the more complex posing to us, we will guide you accordingly.

Bonus: it helps a lot to have a mirror facing you so you can see what's going on.

4) The yellow bathroom lights are rarely a good idea

Prioritize natural light, always. Try to face a window as much as possible, avoid the harsh top lighting, it will create some shadows that will give you the ultimate raccoon look. Most of our artificial lighting has a yellow tone too, which is far from flattering.
Bonus: unless you have a super well lit bathroom, stay away from it (+ it will help with the background mistake we just talked about).

5) Watch out for wardrobe malfunctions!

Make sure everything is where you want it to be. The straps, the stockings, the panties, pasties, whatever you are wearing! There is nothing more frustrating than mastering your lighting, posing and angles and having your beautiful brasilian cut panties are waaaay too low (#unwantedbuttcrack)

Practice and snap away!

Taking your own photos can be really fun, even if you just keep them to yourself! The more you practice, the more fun you will have.

We have also set up an entire online guide to teach you more in depth how you can take your own photos easily with your phone. Make sure to have a look below!

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6 unusual inquiries we got for boudoir photography

Once upon a time, two boudoir photographers were having tasty breakfast together. And like most of new entrepreneurs, they decided to open their emails to check on new inquiries like they did every morning. That day they got a new one and happily started to read it, but their joy faded away when they saw the email attachment: a dick pic… They never opened their emails in the morning ever again 😂

We receive a lot of badass and emotional emails, but from time to time creepy and unusual requests are popping up. Some are hilarious, others are disturbing. 

Scandals, here is our top 6 of the weirdest inquiries we got since we opened Scandaleuse Photography:

N°6 : The dick pic guy

If there is something intriguing with Boudoir and men, is that most of the gentlemen who contact us for a boudoir shoot want to do something more sexual. Which is not a problem! Even if we do not shoot this type of photography we understand everyone has their own fantasies and there is nothing wrong with that. But what is the most disturbing for us is that some men believe we need to see their pee-pee before accepting to work with them. And it usually goes like this:

- Them: “I wanna shoot with you, do you need to see what I look like?”

- Us: “No need to! We do not chose our clients based on their look or body type.”

- Them: sending the picture of big Willy and the twins (with the worst angle and lighting) even thought we said no 😤 But if you really want to show us your joystick, at least do it in an artistic way!

Joke aside, here is a gentle reminder to anyone who want to send us pictures of their genital: just don’t, we really don’t need to see what you look like down there!

It was very tempting to add a moustache and a hat on this photograph and send it back to that particular client. Should we do it next time?

N°5 : The iPad guy

This made us laugh!

We received a long time ago an email from a guy who wanted to shoot one of his sexual fantasy with us, we don’t remember exactly what it was about. With his inquiry he attached a script of all the scenarios he had in mind, scene by scene with details of what we had to shoot (was it badly written on top of being weird? Absolutely!).

But wait, the best part was that he requested that we shoot only with is iPad. Go figure!

N°4 : The pink blouse guy

One day we were contacted by a man who wanted to do a boudoir shoot for his future husband. His idea was to lay down on a bed made of Kleenex - once again everyone has a fantasy. He was also looking for a wedding photographer but didn't want to tell us the date of the wedding - RED FLAG. The icing on the cake was when he asked us to wear pink blouses for the first meeting, because (and we quote) "the first impression is very important".

Sure! Do you want us to wear a french maid outfit so we can clean your discourtesy off your face? 

We nicely told him we would not do it, so he decided to go with another photographer and apparently found one… Good for him!

N° 3 : The "I like humiliation" guy

This one was probably the most recent one. We received an email from a guy who lost a bet and had to do a boudoir shoot, wearing high heels, sexy dress, lingerie and/or be nude. He had to walk like a model and be shoot in some very embarrassing poses, for his humiliation and women amusement.

We obviously declined, told him boudoir photography is an art, and that we work only with people who respect this type of photography.

But we added we could provide some headshots for professional purpose if he was interested. You have to see business opportunity everywhere right?!

N° 2 : The "you need to wear sexy clothes so I can feel turned on" guy

Ooooh man, this was our first weird inquiry. This married man sent us an email because he was looking to do a couple boudoir shoot with his wife. They have been married for 20 years and they were looking to spice up their relationship. We were pretty happy about it since, at that time, we didn't get a lot of couples interested by a boudoir shoot. So he started to explain what he wanted, sent us example of videos and pictures (remember the dick pic story previously, well those were the beginning). His wife had apparently a big and sexual appetite and they were looking for erotic photography. We explained to him this is not the type of service we offer but we could give them sensual pictures without crossing our boundaries.

We were not against working with them, they wanted to celebrate the love they have for each other by trying a new experience.

Unfortunately he crossed the line when he asked us to dress up very sexy during the shoot so he can be more excited. We were happy to not go forward with this inquiry: this couple were the lions, we were the gazelles. 

N° 1: The "let's redo American Pie" guy

And the winner is... (actually my little favourite, probably because I watch all of the American Pie movies)
A man who loved his mom decided to treat her with a boudoir shoot and reach out to us. What a sweet and thoughtful gentleman who was open minded enough to offer this beautiful experience as a gift for his mom. Or so we thought.

We were pretty intrigued so we replied to him asking for more details. Maybe his mom asked him to book the shoot for her, maybe it was a gift for his parents' wedding anniversary, or maybe his mom had self-confidence issues and he wanted to let her out.

We were so wrong, it was not a thoughtful idea but a pretty crazy one:

He wanted some pictures taken of his mom and his best-friend like the scene in the first “American Pie” when Paul Finch is having sex on the pool table with Stifler’s mom. The story never said if it was a spam or a serious request. 

Yes we are photographers whose main goal is to highlight the beauty and sensuality of every bodies, but it doesn't mean we get sexual pleasure out of it. So keep your pants on (at least until the day of the shoot)! We are not part of your fantasy, don't plan to be, and will never ever touch your purple-helmeted warrior of love.  

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What to do if you are victim of domestic abuse

Disclaimer: This blog is part of our Unstoppable project and gather all the information we could find from different sources about domestic abuse. We are not expert in this field, if you are seeking help make sure to contact the appropriate service provider: here is a list to find help across Canada.

Last month we shared with you the steps you can take to help someone who is, or could be, victim or domestic abuse. In today’s blog we will be talking about what you can do if you are the victime. Please don’t hesitate to share this blog with people who might need it.

To prevent and end domestic violence it is important to acknowledge and understand that victims never deserve, nor should be blamed for, the abuse they endure. Abusers are skilled at using power and control over their victims.

What is domestic abuse?

Domestic abuse, also known as “domestic violence” or “intimate partner violence”, is a pattern of behaviours used by one person to gain power and control over another person with whom they have or previously had an intimate relationship (people who are married, living together, or dating).

IT CAN IMPACT ANYONE, REGARDLESS OF GENDER, AGE, SEXUAL ORIENTATION, ETHNICITY, FAITH, EDUCATION, OR INCOME LEVEL.

Those abuse are not only physical, but also includes any sexual, emotional, economic or psychological actions or threats of actions that influence another person (such as behaviours that frighten, intimidate, terrorize, manipulate, hurt, humiliate, blame, injure, or wound someone).

Source: United Nations

If you want to understand more about domestic abuse, we highly recommend the mini serie called MAID. This movie showcases very well the struggles most people victime of emotional abuse are going through:

Recognize the signs

Since domestic abuse is about controlling someone’s mind and emotions before hurting their body, the signs are not always obvious. Victimes are often confused, scared, and not able to see their partner’s actions for what they really are:

Does your partner…

• Constantly diminishes you?

• Control your money?

• Isolates you, cutting you off from friends and family?

• Physically abuses you?

• Forces you to have sex or do intimate things against your will?

• Use intimidation or threats to gain compliance?

• Use drugs or alcohol as an excuse for saying hurtful things or abusing you?

• Blame you for how they feel or act?

• Make you feel there is no way out of the relationship?

Do you...

• Sometimes feel scared of how your partner may behave?

• Constantly make excuses to other people for your partner’s behaviour?

• Believe that you can help your partner change if only you changed something about yourself?

• Try not to do anything that would cause conflict or make your partner angry?

• Always do what your partner wants you to do instead of what you want?

• Stay with your partner because you are afraid of what your partner would do if you broke up?

If any of those are happening to you, don’t feel ashamed or scared to ask for help. Abuses will not stop until until you make the courageous decision to sick help.

What to do if you are being abused?

First of all, know you are not alone, and this is absolutely not your fault!

• CALL FOR HELP

Second, making the decision to get out if this situation can be hard and scary. The best way to get help is to start giving a call to the appropriate service provider:

- Canada: Domestic Violence Helpline at 1-800-563-0808. You can find more crisis hotlines for different provinces here.

- US: National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233

Always call from a friend’s house, a family’s house, or anywhere else where you feel safe. If it is an emergency, call 911.

You can also reach out to people you trust in your circle. Remember, you are not alone!

• HIDE YOUR INTERNET ACTIVITY

Internet is the perfect tool to find information that can help you make decisions about your personal situation and find help. However, closing your browser does not erase the record of your internet activities. If you are concerned that your partner may be monitoring you, you have to learn how to hide your Internet activities.

Learn how to delete cookies from your computer here, and learn more about digital privacy here.

• HAVE AN EMERGENCY ESCAPE PLAN

Taking decision to leave can be very risky for the victims as they will have a greater risk of being killed by their abuser than if they decided to stay. Having an emergency safety plan set up, before leaving or before a crisis occurs, is a very important step.

- Hide a set of car keys, and pack a bag with extra clothes, important papers, money, medicines, and toiletries. You can keep it at a friend’s house or someone you trust.

- Have a safe place to go if you decide to leave. Here you can find different shelters within Canada if you cannot go to someone you trust.

- Have a prepared excuse to leave if you feel threatened.

- Have a code word so your kids, family, friends, or co-workers know you’re in danger.

- Have a list of emergency contacts, including trusted family or friends, local shelters, and domestic abuse hotline.

Sources: Verywell Mind & WebMD

The “Signal For Help”

“Signal for Help” is a simple one-handed sign someone can use on a video call. It can help a person silently show they need help and want someone to check in with them in a safe way. You can find all of the info here!

Domestic abuse is still nowadays taboo and very commun.

It is important to learn how to help the victims. Or if you are yourself the victime, learn to gather all the tools necessary for you and your child’s safety. Not being afraid to talk about this subject is also another important step in the fight against domestic violence.

We all have a role to play! Juliette and I decided to organize an art exhibit to raise funds for the Canadian Women’s Foundation and Sistering, two charities helping people victim of domestic abuse. The grand opening night is happening this March 8th, downtown Toronto. All the donations collected will be equally divided between those two charities.

From indoor jungle to trendy loft: you pick

Have you ever wonder how it would feel like to walk around a new-york style loft like it is your own? Or to have an indoor jungle with 85 plants? Can you picture yourself enjoying a cup of coffee in a sun-bathed midcentury loft?

Relaxing, right? Well, it can become a reality for you, even if it is just for a couple of hours. See, we don't have a photography studio. We have different lofts instead.

Many moons ago, when we opened Scandaleuse, we decided to rent designer's lofts all over the city, rather than commit to one location. And here is why…

1) So you can thrive in a environment you feel good in.

Maybe you would feel more at home in a warm loft, surrounded by plants. Maybe, on the opposite, you'd feel better in a more modern environment. Or even, standing on a rooftop overlooking the city, or right in the middle of the woods with the sun kissing your skin makes your heart sing.

Being in an environment you admire is extremely helpful to let go and embrace your boudoir experience. It makes you feel like a total badass, and this is the energy you want to channel.

The point is: you should be in a place that makes you feel good and that means very different things for everyone.

2) To fuel your and our creativity.

Standing right in a middle of a loft that belongs on Pinterest is a huge boost creativity and inspiration wise. For us as artist, it makes sense but you get to enjoy it too. You will find it a lot easier to pose like a boss in the right place. It is like you are Beyoncé for a second, and only great things can come out of this, right?!

On our end, it gives us the chance to renew ourselves constantly. If we were shooting in the same room for every single shoot and by the 5th one, we will be crawling on the floor, completely out of creative juice. Having multiple options keeps us passionate and creative. And if we stay passionate and creative, you get an awesome shoot. Two birds one stone.

4) To get photos that actually look like you and not others.

Traditional boudoir photos all look the same. They usally take place on a bed, have similar angles and backgrounds. Add the same studio in the recipe and everybody ends up with similar photos.

Picking a loft based on your vision and what makes you feel good allow us to highlight your personality and taste, rather than make you fit in the same mold as everyone else.

Boudoir is an intimate experience and if you decide to take this step, you deserve to have a fully tailored experience so you can express yourself, your way. If you’d like to get more information, you can see all of the details below!

If you’d like to find out what else you can expect from your boudoir shoot before jumping in, get our FREE pdf guide by signing up below!

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Men, boudoir & body image

The boudoir industry has been more appealing to women since its creation. Very likely because it is a field that helps you get in touch with your body, your sensuality, and your femininity. Does that mean that men are excluded?

Absolutely not.

The men body and the body-positive movement

First of all, we are deeply convinced that everyone would appreciate a tasteful and beautiful image of themselves in the nude, whether they keep it private or not. It is the ultimate confidence booster after all.

Yet, while women can now enjoy the body-positive movement in some media and thus, feel more and more included and surrounded with less edited and more real images (yay!), men are stuck with the perfect Calvin Klein model with a 6-pack.

It is just extremely rare to see normal-looking men in the media.

In order to dig a bit more, we went directly to the source and asked the men in our community how they felt about all of this. Darius stated:

“Media & fashion has an enormous influence on how men see their bodies. That even starts in childhood - look at all the comic books, where every superhero is muscular hunky macho man, with strong facial features and sulky expressions. Toys like 'Action Man' and similar also portray certain image of the man. When you grow up, popular image of the movies or cartoons or commercials is of a boy who is athlete, again certain physique attributed to that.”

Women grew up with Barbie's unachieVable body type, but men also grew up with perfect looking action figures. Except Barbie's looks are becoming less and less relevant everyday.

Men VS body issues

It is pretty common for women to express themselves about their body-image. Not that the way it is done is always healthy, but at least, we can have open conversation a lot more easily than our men friends.

If anything, talking about men body-issues is still seen as not-manly, weak, frivolous & even laughable. Great supportive environment, right?

As Mike said:

“Guys struggle with self image quite a bit too but because we aren't (openly) judged on it as much as women, it's more of a quiet struggle. Then again, the amount of guys I know with back problems and knee braces, relocated hair and the inevitable "dad bod" is further down the wish list... the older guys get, the more they just want their body to work like it used to!”

To this day, the clichés around masculinity are still going strong. And they won't go anywhere until more men open up about this, just like women are doing (the difference though is that you have more chances to be listened to and supported than we are, but that's another story!)

So, gentlemen, what benefits could boudoir give you?

1) BOOST YOUR CONFIDENCE by challenging yourself

A boudoir shoot is a challenge by itself. It is vulnerable & sets you out of your comfort zone. But what happens when you step out of your comfort zone? You grow and develop confidence. And this spreads in every area of your life. We can guarantee that you will leave this experience with a confidence boost if you try it.

2) Appreciate your body the way it is

By having a professional boudoir shoot down, you will be given the opportunity to see your body in a flattering way, the way it really is. And this feeling also leads to a healthy and strong personal growth.

3) Get in touch with your feminine side (no it doesn't mean you’re gay!)

Every single human being has both a feminine and masculine side. Women tap into their masculine side constantly (even too much in our current society, but again, that's another topic), so why couldn't you tap into your feminine one? Your feminine side is a huge asset in your life. It keeps you grounded and helps you simply enjoy what is around you. You become more aware of what all of your senses are picking up, it helps you develop new perspectives and creativity. It's a win-win for you and your loved ones!

4) Bring down the pressure around men body-image.

The more regular-looking men we will see around, the more normal it will become, just like it is happening for women. But it has to start somewhere, and it is in your power to demolish those beauty standards by simply showing reality. You won't be only be doing yourself a favor, you will also do one for your fellas too.

5) Break the toxic masculinity

By trying such a vulnerable experience and coming out feeling just good about yourself, you will slowly but surely remove the clichés attributed to men such as “don’t cry, be strong, suck it up, don't be girlie” and so on.

You got the idea, a boudoir shoot will simply give you the chance to feel good about yourself. It is a gift from you, to you. So Why prevent yourself from enjoying an experience like this?

"You're Pretty For a Girl in a Wheelchair"

2 years ago, we received an email from an incredible and gorgeous woman who push her boundaries and decided to talk to us about her disability. She wanted to use boudoir photography as a gift for her 35th birthday, a way to celebrate and treat herself.

Meet Katie

“I wanted to have a photo shoot to celebrate me finding beauty within my own body.

It took me a while to reach self-acceptance. In high school, I remember there was always this pressure society laid out for us that implied that the definition of beauty was to be thin and flawless. I was also a teenager with a physical disability.

I remember being at a mall, shopping with my friends and someone saying to me “You are very pretty, for a girl in a wheelchair”. It really got me to thinking that not only does my physical features go against social norms but so does my disability.

Have we built up such an image in our heads about the ideal look of beauty that we can’t think outside the box?

Why is there a box in the first place?

Why is my attractiveness contingent on the status of my abilities?

Years pass, my body changes, as naturally as a woman’s body would do. I started to carry myself with more confidence as time went by. I made a decision a few times along the way to choose a healthier eating lifestyle.  My weight fluctuated here and there, but I continued to maintain a positive image of myself and I chose to become more active.

As a young woman with a physical disability, exercising routines had to be modified. I started including weekly swimming sessions, seeing a physiotherapist to see how I could optimize increasing my range of motion, and I use a hand bicycle three times a week. In addition to exercise, I found and implemented a diet that suited me, personally. I was able to eat healthy and still eat the foods I enjoy.

Now that I was on a good path, it was time to focus on pampering myself.  Display to the world, how I am feeling on the inside.

“Yes, as a curvy woman with a disability,

I embrace and celebrate my sexuality.”

But I wasn’t always brave enough to share it openly on such a public platform. I am ready to challenge what people expect.

I am Katie, I’m thirty-five years old, single, curvy, sexy and beautiful.

Thank you, Juliette and Fanny, for helping me to bring out a side of me I wasn’t sure existed. I have a feeling the journey has only just begun…

“You are not invisible! You are worthy!” 

A big part in making my decision to do a shoot comes from this breathtaking piece of poetry by my dear friend Forest Blakk: SWIPE RIGHT

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We can never be too careful: Boudoir Photography

Phase two of the quarantine is almost here which means you will finally be able to do that boudoir shoot you have been dreaming of those past months! The first step is choosing the perfect photographer based on your vision and that process can be bit overwhelming, especially if it is your first time. But this step is really important because you want your shoot to reflect your personality and most importantly, YOU WANNA MAKE SURE YOU WILL BE SAFE!

Boudoir photography is a beautiful experience and an incredible tool to fully reconnect with yourself and get intimate photographs of your badass-self. But since boudoir empowers sensuality, it sadly has the tendency to attract malicious people who use it as an excuse to assault women.

It is sad that we have to take so many precautions but this is the kind of world we live in. This is why it is important to be extra careful when you book your session and we will tell you everything you need to know so it never happens to you!

You have less risks with female photographers.

I am sorry gentlemen I am not saying you are all the same, I know a lot of male photographers are very respectful to women. The goal of this post is not to put every men in the same basket, I just want women to feel comfortable when they're about to stand in lingerie or naked in front of photographers.

I have been working in the photography industry for 10 years and I have never heard stories of women assaulting their clients. Unfortunately, it seems to happen with some men and I am not only talking about the relationship between male photographers and women clients as it also happens between male clients and female photographers: 9 times out of 10, when we get an inquiry from a man, they turned out sketchy. For example, some have asked us to dress up sexy so they can feel turned on during the shoot. We have never gotten any bad emails from women.

Professionals are a go-to

We didn't spend years to learn our craft just to have a piece of paper to look pretty on a wall. Photography is a real career and doesn't only require to press the trigger.

So please, I am begging you, hire professional photographers who have a proper website, social media and reviews. Stop going on Kijiji or Craiglist to find the person who will take intimate pictures of yourself in his basement. This is how problems start most of the time!

Safety first

It is really easy with the internet to pretend to be someone else. As mentioned above, some men uses "boudoir" photography to get closer to women and get them to pose them naked in very sexualized poses. Sometimes, it doesn't go any further that just bad taste, but in other cases, nightmares have happened with women getting assaulted.

This is why it is important to meet your photographer face to face in a public place, a proper photography studio or at least on skype (actually this rule should apply in our every day life, we can never be too careful!).

We personally always, always, always meet our potential clients before starting anything. We have refunded a deposit because we did not feel safe. Plus it is pretty nice to talk about your photo shoot around a cup of coffee and pastry, isn't it?!

Also, know that you should be allowed to bring someone with you. If the photographer says no, leave, it's a red flag.

Last but not least: we know pricing is a big factor when choosing your photographer and it is why some women go for cheap photography services without thinking of the risks behind. Don't you think it will be better to postpone the shoot to save up what you need and get breathtaking photographs of yourself and a proper boudoir experience?

Do your own research

The good thing with internet is you can track people to see if they are serious and professional.

• Read the reviews people leave on google, forum and other websites. It will give you a good overview of the person and the company.

• Don't hesitate to ask questions to your photographer and tell her/him if you feel anxious. Your photographer should care about your feelings and do his/her best to reassure you. If the photographer doesn't really reply to your questions, keep them unclear or doesn't explain to you how the session will go, then go with someone else.

Trust your instinct

Either you go with a female or male photographer, there is one think you should always do: FOLLOW YOUR GUT!! 

The human body is very powerful for this and we are most of the time able to feel when something or someone is wrong.

If you have a bad feeling about the person who is going to do your photo shoot, don't go through with it.

The recap:

• Avoid Kijiji or Craiglist.
• Always meet with your photographer(s)
• Check the company's reputation with reviews or referrals.
• Have a contract signed and the details of the session laid out before the day of. Everything has to be crystal clear.
• Bring someone with you or let someone know where you will be and when you'll be done.

Stay awesome but more importantly: stay safe.

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Luck should not be an excuse

A lot of people around us seem to be amazed by the life and experiences we living. Our Scandaleuse's community, travels, photoshoots and projects we had (and keep having) seem to be impressive and people truly enjoy it. We have never received so many compliments and love from friends, family, clients and strangers since we have left France. “You guys are lucky” they say…

Luck has nothing to do with it

When we were living in London, during a cold winter evening, we were talking to a friend from photography school online. He was asking questions about our life in London and was telling us his dream was to go to Australia but felt a bit lost and scared about this idea. We remember him telling us: “you guys are so lucky for leaving Paris, I wish I could do the same but you know my english is pretty bad and living in another country is expensive”. So we told him we weren’t lucky, we just kicked our own butts and took the decision to leave. Don't imagine everything was perfect, when we arrived in London our English was pretty bad, we didn’t have a job and only a few savings.

We could have found every excuses to not go to England because yes it was scary. Instead we decided not to listen to our negative thoughts and booked our ride. And you know what? It was the best decision ever! In 8 years we have achieved a lot in our lives (both professionally and personally) and we have met a lot of wonderful people from all over the world, who helped us make our dreams come true.

But this has nothing to do with luck! We work hard, we take risks, we get out of our comfort zone, we stress, we cry but most of the time we have fun. You know why?

Because we just love what we do and this is the best motivation you can get!

Stop stopping yourself

We all have excuses and fears, obstacles we put in front of ourselves but there is something easy to understand:

if you want, you can.

Don't get us wrong, we are not saying all dreams are easy to realize (most of them require knowledge, money, strength, time and surrounding yourself with the right people), neither we are all born with a silver spoon in our mouth. But even if we don't all have the same financial situation or life benefits, living the life you dream of IS POSSIBLE when you have ideas, projects and a strong will to change.

There is a famous quote from Tony Gaskins that has helped us understanding the power of “I Can” and positively impacted the decision to open our business:

"if you don’t build your dream, someone will hire you to build theirs."

The "GYST": Get Your Stuff Done

The first step is the most difficult to take but once you start working on your project, it will get easier, especially if you got a proper organization:

• Find your goal

• Plan step by step how to make it successful.

• Make the steps to do so accessible and specific. It will sounds unreachable otherwise.

• Invest or find investors to help you financially

• Educate yourself on the knowledge you are missing to achieve your goal. (PS: Libraries in Toronto are free. Just saying.)

• Or build a team of people who know how to do what you don't

• Spend time on your project. Kiss the procrastination goodbye.

• And most important: DON'T GIVE UP!

There are wonderful tools (such as internet and libraries that are full of information) available to help you take the first step towards realizing your projects. And if you don’t know or if you can’t do, don't hesitate to ask people around you for help; you will be surprised to see you are not alone. People will be happy to help you!

Remember, you are the only one who can move things up for your own happiness and future. Don't you want to become the person you desire to be?

Now roll-up your sleeves and go build your mini-empire!

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Own your identity, armpit hair or not.

Get ready for this universal truth: we all have hair. Everywhere. And you've probably heard at least once in your life "you should remove it", "it's gross", "why do you care?" "all natural baby!" "Aren't French people hairy anyway?"(oh wait, that one is for us eheh). It's time to unleash the truth.

Hair, no hair; does it really matter?

A couple of months ago, Marion Seclin (a french influencer we are following on social media), was talking about the fact she did a photoshoot with a brand who edited her hair out on Photoshop, without notifying her. She said she took the decision 4 years ago to let her hair grow naturally and she was very angry about the studio’s behaviour:

The decisions concerning YOUR body belongs to YOU and you ONLY.

By photoshoping her hair out, without her CONSENT, that brand violated her right to be the individual SHE DESIRES TO BE. They disrespected her life's choices. And for what? Because they felt like she didn’t match their standards. Standards usually imposed by the media, fashion industries and beauty companies.

Nobody should tell you what is the best for you (either on a physical or mental level). Hair or no hair doesn't make one single difference. If people are telling you the opposite, you might not want to have them in your life.

Your body's decisions must be made based on your opinion. not others.

If you choose to wax every 3 weeks or not, it should be because it makes you feel great that way and not because you feel like you HAVE to do it.

Story time: We had a wonderful photo shoot with Léa Castor in Paris. She stopped removing her hair a couple of years ago, because she realized that she wasn't really doing it for her, but for her lover at the time. She said that she wanted to start loving her hair the way it actually is, but it was hard. Not because she thinks it looks ugly but because of society: she felt like people will judge and criticize her.

When we first talked about her session, we really wanted to showcase and do close-ups of her hair to tell the world "hey see, it's not bad at all!" but it turns out that we just focused on her as a person like we always do. And guess what?

No one actually noticed her hair and for the few photos where you could actually see it, it just looked great.

By not making the hair the main focus and sticking to our way of shooting (about the actual person and not her physique), we just made it normal.

We didn’t bring attention to it because we didn’t think it defined her fully anyway. And no one cared either.

Building your identity despite expectations: damn that's hard.

But damn, it is worth it. Being able to live your life the way you want to is the best feeling in the world.

You feel in harmony with your values, you can take on anything, it is pretty much the road to your long-term happiness. Jackpot.

However, from the minute you will start making decisions to be fully yourself, you are going to have to face… the Others.

They could be friends, family, anyone who feel like sharing their 2 cents about whatever it is you are doing for yourself and they are probably against what you are doing. And this makes the whole process for building your own identity very challenging.

This is when you have to stick to your guns. Why? Because any critics about your journey is actually not about you. It’s about whoever says them. They are simply projecting their own insecurities and fears on you.

People who don’t feel like they are giving it all in their own lives are going to try to bring down anyone who tries.

Read that again.

• You want to start weight-lifting and you are hearing “ugh you're gonna be so bulky, it’s not feminine”?
• You want to learn a new skill and you hear “oh, I know someone who tried and they failed, it was so hard, you’re not gonna make it.”
• You want to let your damn hair grow and they’re like “this is just gonna look gross, why do you do that to yourself?”

They are not thinking about YOU. By you trying something new and different, they just have no excuse not to and it makes them very uncomfortable. Because they have to face their own fears and limiting beliefs.

So don’t take it personally. Don’t let them bring you down. Keep being true to yourself. This is your life.

A little recap for the road:

• Living your life being fully yourself is possible for everyone.

• Decisions about your body are only yours to make.

• People who are criticizing your decisions are not talking about you but about themselves.

Are you ready to move forward and become the best version of yourself? We can help you. Join us on January 1st and become Limitless.

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