Boudoir over 40: why you should definitely do it.

Boudoir photography comes with an endless list of benefits that absolutely everyone can enjoy. We can also say that boudoir sparks a lot of interest in everyone, no matter your age, who you identify with, and if you like cilantro or not. Yet, a fear keeps crippling in the back of many people over 40 and it always comes out as a ”I am way too old to do for this".

Obviously no, you’re not and here is why you should consider it big time…

So, what is really behind the ”I am too old to do this”?

After asking our surrounding, this is what came out: being potentially judged by other people is scary as hell.

Just risking having someone say you look ”ugly” or ”ridiculous” is too much to handle.

And we don't blame you! Bodies change over years. Wrinkles show up, for some, babies have happened, provoking even stronger changes… Your body has become a map of memories and society has told us all that it looks bad and/or that it is not good enough. Fun.

None of the beauty standards are accurate.

breaking free from them is the best gift you can give yourself.

Everyone gets older, you are not doing anything wrong by doing it too. You’ve been putting in the work for yourself, for your body. It has been serving you for many years and it deserves to be embraced, celebrated, welcomed. YOU deserve to feel celebrated.

Following those unattainable standards creates limitations for you and you end up passing on experiences you may not only enjoy but could also contribute greatly to your happiness.

All of this because a random bunch of people decided that you shouldn't, for no good reason whatsoever. We are not gonna let those win now, are we?

Learning to appreciate your appearance also comes with the strongest perk of all: a rock solide self-confidence which leads to stop giving a rat’s ass about what other people think of you.

With this tool on your belt, you can finally do things for you, in your own terms. Now, that's happiness!

So what can you do in order to get to that sweet spot of self-acceptance?

• Understand that judgment is not about you.

It is about people projecting their own insecurities and fears on you.

We think about ourselves a lot, even when someone tells us a story that has nothing to do with us. For example, if you are mentioning something you'd like to do and the person you are talking to secretly wants to as well but doesn’t have the guts to do it: chances are they will try to dissuade you. They’re not talking about you, you are just mirroring something in them. Now that you know that, it is so much easier to detach from the judgement and not let it influence your decisions.

• Ditch the dummies.

If you get negative feedback on anything you do, you are not the problem. The people giving you the feedback are. And if this is a recurring problem, it sounds like you are not getting anything interesting from those people, the best thing to do is limit or end the relationship with them. You don’t need demeaning people in your life.

• Give yourself permission.

Now that you've ditched the impact of judgement, you have to allow yourself to do things. It sounds simple, but many of us don't.

Remind yourself that the best adventures are waiting for you outside of your comfort zone.

Even if it is just that colourful dress which caught your eye in the window that you would love to wear. There are absolutely NO GOOD REASONS not to wear something that could make you happy.  Don’t even try to justify it, just try to the goddamn dress instead. And don’t you dare dumping it at the bottom of your closet.

Boudoir gives you the chance to try a liberating experience, just for you.

It resets the image you have of yourself on the positive. You get an objective look, which is 100% of the time much better than what we believe - and gives you such a boost of confidence you will be craving for more.

All of this while… giving a great middle finger to expectations. That's always a nice way to satisfy our rebellious side!

Over half of our clients are actually over 40. And that includes women, but also men. You may not see it because many of them ask to keep their pictures private, but they are definitely here. So you are definitely not the only one tempted by the wonderful world of boudoir!

You 👏🏻 are 👏🏻 enough.
How about to start enjoying your life the way YOU want to? Some many beautiful moments await!

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I stopped wearing bras and something cool happened

About three years ago, I stopped wearing bras. Mostly because first: I don't have much to support and second: because bralettes became trendier and trendier. And guess what? I only got a positive outcome out of it.

Disclaimer: I am team small boobies. I don't have any back issues. If you do, you may want to try it slowly before burning all of your bras. Just saying.

Put the stereotypes down and turn off the slut-shaming.

I started wearing a bra way before high school just to do like my friends and followed this vicious cycle for over a decade. People tend to think you are a tease if you walk around without one. Like your breasts are here to turn on people only and how dare you exposing them like that? Don't you see strangers can see your... your.... *whisper* nipples?!

NEWS FLASH: we all have nipples. Mind blown.

Between you and I, a few years ago, even I was slightly uncomfortable  when I noticed a woman not wearing a bra in a public place. Why? No freaking clue. Because, seriously, there are no reason to feel that way. I realize today how stupid it was but I guess I was conditioned to see strictly maintained breasts and BOOM, these ladies were't following "the rules". God they were right!

The best feeling in the world? Taking your bra off.

We all did it. You get home, you have this thing strapped around your torso and the minute you snap it off, you have such a good feeling of freedom that you can almost get a tiny orgasm. I did this for many years.

I remember reading more and more testimonials about how some women stopped wearing these very uncomfortable things and how no one died and the Earth kept on spinning.

It slowly made its way in my head and it hit me: why the hell am I even bothering wearing one if it's so uncomfortable to begin with? So one day, I bought... a bralette. At first, the idea of walking around without anything at all made me uncomfortable. But like anything good in life, you get use to it and it is worth it!

Bralettes are LIFE my friend. They are cute, they are cheap and HOLY MOLY they are COMFORTABLE.

I can safely say now that I ditched my old painful bras for a sweet collection of these little things. And then, something quite unexpected happened...

I actually started to like my boobs the way they are.

Truth is, I never really liked my girls until two years ago. My bras were actually a way to change their shape, hide them, lift them, you name it. Because of course, I only owned the push-ups, pretty thick, underwire bras. Again, I am team small boobies and the lifting is not an issue I need to worry about.

I was very self-conscious and wearing bralettes with absolutely no support or thickness made me see them the way they are on an every day basis. And I did better than getting used to them: I started actually liking them.

I have reading articles saying that if you wear a bra constantly, the shape of your breast is affected by it. Not wearing them allows your boobs to support themselves and they get in the shape they are supposed to be. To be honest, I don't even know if it's true, but I do believe it made a difference on me.

Don't get me wrong, I still like lingerie

I do think lingerie is awesome and can give you a boost towards your sexiness. I still have a couple of classics for when I want to spice things up and I will very likely get more. But it is not out of necessity anymore. It is because it makes me feed good.

Wanna try? Here are a few tips:

• You don't have to stop everything at once, every day. Start with a few hours or even one day a week when you are home, just to test the waters.
• Get a few bras without underwiring, or again, bralettes to help with the transition.
• Nipple conscious but ready to rock the no-bra? You can get those little pasties to hide your nipples until you are ready to... stop giving a f*ck.

I can't tell you the amount of tops I can't wear a bra with because of the design that I now own proudly. Free the boobies.

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All the "no’s" have simply been guiding me to bigger "Yes’s"

This post is a part of our series “If I Had Listened", in which we're reached out to strong-minded women we admire to tell us about a moment they chose to trust their gut and follow a different path despite other people's opinion.

If I had listened to all the "no’s" I wouldn’t have received all the "yes’s".

The amount of "no’s" that I have faced in my career have been endless, and have truly made me doubt my self worth and purpose.

But what I have grown to understand is that all the "no’s" have simply been guiding me to bigger "Yes’s".

My dance journey began at an older age than most, so for me I was always the underdog, always one step behind those of my peers. It used to frustrate me, because it seemed like no matter how hard I worked I wasn’t reaching the level of those around me. Little did I know this struggle was developing me & prepping me to receive all the blessings that lied ahead.

I began to build a humble foundation, understanding that nothing great would come easy, and that hard work, sacrifices and pain would make receiving the reward that much more valuable.

With time & continued dedication my training lead me to become a dance student at Ryerson University’s Dance program. Accepting my offer was an absolute dream come true. I was a small town girl moving to the big city to pursue her dance dreams. I felt like Jody Sawyer from "Centre Stage", the ballerina with the non stereotypical ballet body, and average ballet technique that Ryerson was taking a chance on, and funny enough that was exactly how my story unfolded.

I was in a program that was stripping everything beautiful about me away, and trying to squeeze me into a box that I would never fit into.

It was so damaging and so heartbreaking because I wanted nothing more than to meet their unrealistic and unattainable requirements so badly, but the truth was, I never would. The program beat me down, and stole my love for dance completely away from me. I was told that I would never be enough, that there was no place for me in the industry and that it was best if I looked at other career options. Ouufff, at the age of 19, those words were so damaging, because I admired and respected my teachers so much. My dreams of pursuing dance professionally, slowly seemed unattainable & unrealistic.

Now this was a defining moment for me, because I faced a crucial "No" at such an influential time in my life. I was young, impressionable, and easily influenced by my mentors, but something deep inside wasn’t allowing that "No" to define who I was.

I knew that there was a place for me in this industry and if there wasn’t I needed to create a place, and that is exactly what I did.

I used all those “no’s” to drive me to so many successful “yes's”, one very important "yes" being my heels company Sensual Heeling Inc.

Many times I’ve been asked “how did you know you wanted to be a dancer/choreographer and found your own heels company Sensual Heeling?” and the answer is I didn’t know, I didn’t know that any of this was achievable, let alone successful. I think the most beautiful part of it all is that I just didn’t give up, even at my lowest of lows, I kept on striving to be the best version of myself, despite what that looked like to others.

Many laughed at me, judged me, and doubted that my talent wasn’t enough to turn my passion into a success story, but here I am still standing strong, inspiring so many women each and every single day through my heels company Sensual Heeling. It truly comes down to your own personal happiness. Dance makes me happy, despite all the "no’s" I’ve received and continue to receive, dance always brings me back to a place of joy. Just as much as it has brought me joy, it has also brought me heartache. But nothing worth fighting for comes easy, and I’d rather have moments of unhappiness building a career that continually brings me back to a place of pride & joy then a career that is just sufficient.

My biggest piece of advice is stop waiting for approval, stop allowing all the "no’s" to define you. We as humans wait and we yearn for the approval of others when in the big picture the only approval that matters, is your own. You need to ensure you are living life for yourself and no one else, because if you aren’t happy then what is the value in living?

Kaela is 100% right, it is very important to live your life by your own rules and to not be afraid to become unapologetically you!

And we have something just for you that will help you get there! We have put together 6 easy tips you can use now to better your life. All you have to do is click below to get them!

Take control of your self-image

Originally written for The Beach Psychotherapy in Toronto

We never see ourselves the way we really are. And that could be okay if we didn’t have a tendency to turn towards negative feelings about our own image. Let’s be real, rare are the people who don’t fall into self-criticism.

Three years ago when we started Scandaleuse Photography, we didn’t know how much we would help women struggling with their self-perception. Women that can’t stand looking in the mirror and end up avoiding them at all costs. Women who think they are never good enough or who got their self-respect stolen from them. Women who feel stuck, who lack the amazing feeling of accomplishment that gives you butterflies and the motivation to keep growing and improving.

Because the relationship you have with yourself starts on the physical aspect and can impact everything else in your life.

Your femininity is a source of positive energy you need to tap into.

First things first: you are not alone. At least 1 out 5 Canadian women are not happy with the way they look. That is huge. There is a certain pressure society lays out for us that implies, or rather screams at us, that the definition of beauty is to be thin and flawless. Seeing this very day, It is very difficult not to compare yourself to these standards and feel miserable if you think you don’t match them.

You are your best ally and your worst enemy. Getting in touch with yourself is essential for a positive mind growth and it starts with celebrating your own kind of beauty and femininity, your way.

That’s right, your version of being feminine. Because there isn’t just one perfect way, you can twist it and morph it making it your own.

Let us tell you a little story. When we photographed Lea, she told us she refused to see herself as attractive. She could see it through her partners’ eyes, but couldn’t believe it from her own perspective. Through her session, she finally managed to see that she was beautiful with every aspect of her body. Things she had considered “flaws” such as, “her asymmetrical breasts, soft belly, cellulite and hair”

Sometimes you need to see yourself from another pair of eyes to ditch the distorted image you have of yourself.

If you have one day in which you feel even a tiny bit good about yourself, channel it 500% and use it as a constant strength. Because while we all have moments when we feel not so good about ourselves, we also have days when, hey, we’re actually okay. It could be as simple as having a good hair day or a little success like changed that light bulb that had been burnt out for months. Take this feeling, hold it tight and nurture the hell out of it.

Take Katie as an example, a lovely woman with a physical disability. She decided to not let this get it the way and to celebrate her true self. It started slowly, one step at a time with a better diet and focusing on improving her range of motion. She put herself on a good path, wanting to make of her goals come true: showing it to the world. That’s when she called us. She said it herself “I am ready to challenge what people expect. You are not invisible, you are worthy.”

What about when someone stole and damaged your self-love?

This is Erica’s story. Erica suffered from the hatred of a man, a family member for years. While she managed to escape, it wasn’t without consequences: this experience completely destroyed her self-esteem. She told us she didn’t have control of her own image anymore. We met completely randomly and she gathered the courage to challenge herself with a boudoir session.

It wasn’t easy. We saw her shake, hesitate and even tear up but she did it. Posing in front of the lens made her realize that the qualities she was admiring in others were also part of her.

She was able to win back what she thought was gone forever and shout out to the whole world “I will never feel ashamed to be me anymore.”

This feeling of accomplishment is a great push to keep going, you end up craving it and you’ll do anything to keep creating and experiencing it.

The truth is: once you get the courage to show yourself and vulnerable in lingerie in front of “strangers”, you’re left with an empowering feeling of “I can do anything”.  Everyone needs to challenge themselves on different levels. It makes you want to keep going, it helps you grow and become more assertive, thus more confident. You end up creating a cycle of positive vibes which will lead you to move mountains.

Treat yourself like you would treat your best friend, because after all, YOU are your best friend. If there is one thing you need to take away from this post is that you only have one body and one mind; it’s YOURS to make use out of it.

If you feel like spending time with us on a Sunday morning with pastries & coffee, join us on March 22nd for our new workshop “A guide to trusting yourself” ! Sign up below to get the deets!

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4 things we learned by becoming boudoir photographers

Even though we have been shooting boudoir here and there for 10 years, we decided to make it our main focus 3 years ago. Becoming full time boudoir photographers have taught us some quite unexpected facts…

1) There is a huge therapeutic aspect to boudoir photography

Don’t get us wrong, of course we knew that having boudoir photos taken can help a lot of aspects in your life. But when we first opened, we were mainly focused on the physical part of it, like getting more comfortable in your own skin. We quickly noticed thanks to our clients sharing their stories with us that the impact was much much bigger than “just” that.

Like Marine, who told us her weight loss journey, or another Scandal mentionning being assaulted over a decade ago, who said she lost her own image and couldn’t really see herself anymore. Or Léa, who managed to regain her sense of femininity, Or the lovely lady who hit the reset button on her life, got a divorce, got a new partner and just wanted to celebrate life.

We have helped women wiN their own self image back, deal with obstacles on a daily basis, get stronger, louder, prouder in our own little ways. And that’s incredibly rewarding.

That's also why we also decided to now team up with a mindset consultant, so we can go deeper and help on the long run. In case you missed it, we are actually having a model call to try it out, you should check it out!

2) The snow ball effect

Little did we know that this very positive effect from above would spread all around... Until we received feedback from our clients after their photos, thanking us for giving them confidence to apply to their every day life. They’ve become more assertive, more determined and are not as scared of changes as they used to be. Even their posture have improved!

We now see it during every session: you pass the door slightly nervous, not sure what to do, you leave the shoot walking tall and proud, ready to conquer the world. The best part? It doesn’t just stop at the day of the shoot.

3) We have impacted ourselves by impacting others.

Or how we’ve impacted ourselves by impacting others. Ironically, while we are always the first one to encourage women to embrace their bodies, we were having our own struggles with ours. Without knowing, we started our own healing process by inspiring ourselves from YOU Scandals.

When we first opened Scandaleuse, we needed content for advertising purpose. A lot of our models have a clause in their contracts to forbid the use of their photos on any kind of support, which is pretty understandable. We needed content, so we took the decision to use ourselves to advertise.

And oh boy the life changing decision that was: we went from the shy first photos with as much coverage as possible to getting naked in the woods just for the hell of it.

Fact: I peed my pants before posting this one a year ago and almost chickened out. No, I want to print it for my living room.

If you had told us this a few years ago, we would have laughed at your face. Now we are like “I want my next shot to be in a busy street, wearing nothing but a trench coat”. Our perceptions of our own bodies have changed drastically and, just like you, the snow ball effect applied to us. Shaking the Earth to get what we want is definitely a skill added to our resume, and we have you to thank for that.

4) Turns out men also have body issues

The media don’t talk about it. You know, men are too strong to feel self conscious about their appearance bruh. The truth is, men can also feel crappy about the way they look, and can also benefit for some boudoir photos. 9 times out of 10, when men inquire with us, we can tell they fish for information, are tempted, but aren’t quite ready to say it out loud yet. Guess what gentlemen? We’re not going anywhere, so we will definitely be here when you’re ready to make the jump! In the meantime, you can read this. You’re welcome.

We never thought that being boudoir photographers would be so rewarding, on so many levels. We couldn’t be happier that you guys are allowing us to build our carrer out of it. You get stronger and so do we. And this will lead to newer, bigger projects…

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IUD: the life saver

Disclaimer: Just like our birth control blog post, I am talking about my own experience and feedback in this post. I am not a doctor and this should not be considered as legal advice. You should seek appropriate counsel for your own situation.

I asked to have an IUD inserted when I was 18. I am now 27 and on my second one. Over the years, I have seen many women that were never offered that option and barely know what it was. If you are looking for a hormone-free alternative for your birth control, I gotcha.

Ok, what’s the IUD in the first place?

First of all, IUD stands for Intrauterine Device. It is a birth control system, and just like its name says, it is a little device inserted in the uterus to prevent pregnancy to prevent pregnancy. You have two options available for you: one is made of copper and hormone-free, the other one sends progesterone hormones. I personally have the hormone-free one.

How the copper IUD (hormone free) works:
The IUD releases copper ions into your cervix. Copper makes your uterus a pretty hostile environment for sperm. Your cervix begins to produce a thick mucus that sperm can't navigate navigate through to get to your egg.

Now that you know, you and I are about to become very close….

When the pill drives you crazy.

I was on the pill for a little bit over 2 years and after a while, I noticed some side effects: my mood was changing drastically, I was crying for no reason and just wanted to lie down on train tracks. My libido had decided to run away to Mexico, having sex was painful (#litteraldryspell).

Long story short, I realized it wasn’t normal and it sucked balls.

I knew a bit about the IUD from sex-ed in school, and when I did my research, I found out there was a hormone-free version that lasted for 5 freaking years, so my mind went “BINGPOT!” (Brooklyn 99 fans will know). I booked an appointment with my gynecologist at the time, and off I went.

“But you’re so young/haven’t had children yet!”

Not gonna lie, in order to get this IUD, I had to go through small obstacles with my doc. The first myth was that you need to have had children in order to get an IUD inserted. I heard it was because it could make you sterile. WRONG. It was maybe true 45 years ago, but definitely not nowadays, and absolutely not with the copper one.

The second obstacle was concerning my age, which honestly has nothing to do with it. As long as you are sexually active, you can definitely have an IUD.

My doctor insisted that I try the micro pill, which has fewer hormones and is to be taken exactly at the same time everyday (#superconvenient). I tried it, didn’t do anything, I went back to the office and said “that’s it”. And hallelujah, we did it.

Let’s do it!

First of, you will have to be off the pill (slowly and with your doctor’s recommendations! You don’t stop the pill one day to the other like Fanny said here) . Since I had tried another pill variation with less hormones, I transitioned slowly into no birth control at all.

Then, you will get a blood test done. It is to see if everything is fine with you, if there is a chance for your body to reject the IUD, because yes, it is rare but it can happen.

Once you are in the clear, you will have to wait for your period to get the IUD inserted.

The insertion

The good news? It lasts for 2 minutes. The bad news? It sucks.

I am sorry to be blunt, but it is painful (and I like to think I have a fairly good pain tolerence), especially when you are on your period, it’s already not a fun time. If you have had a pap test done before, it starts like this and the boom sharp pain and it’s over. You are left with a device in your body and very likely some cramps for the rest of the day.

I am going to be real with you, in my opinion, the pain is worth it. A few minutes of pain for more than 5 years of peace? Sign me up. Actually I already did, I am on my second IUD.

The Pros and some advice for you, my fellow uterus owners

PROS:

• You will be good for between 5 to 10 years depending on the brand you use for your IUD. FREEDOM.

• You won’t have nasty hormones injected in your body and we all know that hormones from birth control are not your friends, girlfriend.

• Once it is inserted, you don’t have to worry about a thing. I personaly have mine checked every year to make sure it hasn’t moved and in 8 years, it never did.

• No need to have an alarm on your phone to remind you to take a pill, no freak out when you are not home and forgot your birth control, no fear of running out and not being able to get a prescription.

• Its efficiency rate is 99%, woot woot!

• Way cheaper alternative than the pill too. I paid my IUD around $145 for 10 years. Boom.

Besides the short pain, I really don’t have cons. Yep.

Advice:

• Don’t go alone to your insertion appointment. It ain’t a day in the park, you may feel a bit dizzy and it is definitely not recommended to drive afterwards and also….

• Take a day off so you can chill afterwards. I spent my afternoon in a hot bath after my insertion.

• You will go back on your real period. While you are on the pill, you don’t have real period per se and having your “real ones” can be painful. I always had cramps even while on the pill and a mild endometriosis, so I was already on the sucker team so it didn’t change much.

• It doesn’t protect you against the STDs. If you are having multiple partners, you still have to wear condoms until you all get tested.

Hope this helps ladies. Remember, you are the only one that can choose your birth control plan. And you are allowed to try different options. Don’t be afraid to ask questions!

Gentlemen special: how to approach a boudoir photographer

Spoiler alert: boudoir photography isn’t exclusively for women contrary to what a lot of people may think. So yes, if you are a man, you can definitely want to also have nice intimate picture of yourself. However, we have noticed that you may need a teeny tiny bit of help to take the plunge.

Disclaimer: we will be very explicit in this blog post, we have no issues talking about anything openly and neither should you.

You have every right to want a boudoir shoot.

Women are not the only ones who need some me-time and want to feel good about themselves. Male boudoir is becoming more and more popular and it is pretty awesome considering how great the outcome of a session is in self-confidence, self-love and handling new challenges positively.

The difference between boudoir, erotic and pornography

That is the first question you need to ask yourself: what are you looking for exactly?

We receive a lot of inquiries from men who seem to be mistaking boudoir, erotic and pornography. One point in common with the 3: they all involve nudity (partially or fully) & an intimate setting (unless you want to shoot outdoors like some of our Scandals!)

The background is very important in boudoir, since we create a whole concept to showcase sensuality in a subtle way.
Example: let’s pretend you are hanging out all sexy and cute in your living room.

Erotic involves more sensual and passionate outcome, with potentially implied sexual acts. Which we do. No close-up of genitals, no masturbation or penetration and what not.
Example: you’re arched on your bed with one end on your chest, the other one down on your private parts.

Pornography involves sexual acts (solo or not), with a lot of close-ups. Which is not what we personally do, just because it is not the message we want to focus on with Scandaleuse.

Cut to the chase, there is nothing wrong in asking.

The amount of phone calls we get from hesitant men who don’t dare saying exactly what they are looking for. We have heard “I don’t want to scare you” so many times already: just say what you have in mind directly. If there is one thing that is safe to assume with boudoir photographers, is that we are not afraid to talk about sexuality.

As long as you are respectful, you can literally ask us anything. However, it is unnecessary to insist when we say no.

We have heard before “not even a little bit of sex?” when we said we do not photograph sexual acts. We respect everyone’s fantasies and fetishes -as long as is it consensual- but it is not our specialty and it will never be.

We don’t need any examples of what you or your private parts look like.

Surprinsingly, a few people seem to genuinely think we need a glimpse of what they actually look like before deciding to book a shoot or not. We don’t. We don’t book our clients depending on their looks, and especially not the looks of their genitals.

As for the ones who actually uses contacting us as an excuse to fulfill a fantasy, just know that...

We are not part of the fantasy

We are two women. And we are French. As silly as it may sound, it is a turn on to a lot of men. We were asked in a good chunck of the inquiries we received to be an actual part of the potential’s client fantasy.
Example: “can you dress sexy during the shoot so I can be turned on?“ Nope we won’t. We are artists and professionals before anything else and again, while we are very open minded, we are only here to capture you and give you beautiful photographs. Period.

Conclusion: you can talk to us freely as long as respect is applied. We are not here to judge you and it is always a pleasure to hear your ideas and try our best to make them come to life. Don’t be shy and reach out!

What to do when your life is falling apart.

Do you feel like nothing you knew makes sense anymore? Your left is right, your black is white? This is kind of what happened with us over the past few weeks: our lives changed drastically.  If you feel like yours is too, maybe we can help.

The good news: your life may be falling apart/changing in unexpected ways but it is very likely for the best.

We do believe in the saying "everything happens for a reason". Whether you made a chains of decisions to get there or someone did it for you, you have two options: you sink and spiral or you do the best you can not to.

It's okay to wallow

Hey. Sh*t just hit the fan. If you think it is not going to impact you and you will keep doing cartwheels, you are very likely wrong. A good cry is a good way to relieve some stress. When Fanny and I moved in together a few weeks ago, we bought a bottle of wine, determined to laugh it up, and we ended up crying for 4 hours. But guess what? We felt much better after. So put on your ugly cry face, build a fort if you need to and go at it!

Asking for help doesn't make you weak.

I am guilty of the "I don't need anyone" syndrome - I am a strong woman right? Haha. I am so glad that a few people stuck out for me during the dark times to take me out and distract me. And let me ramble for hours. The lesson I learned? You can reach out to people and they will likely be here you. Just make sure you return the favor when it's their turn (manners!).

Rebuild your routine

Since your life just went upside down like a neglected canoe, so is your routine. You're sad, you eat like crap, you sleep poorly, you can't focus... But routines are so important for our sanity, they bring a feeling of familiarity, which we lack desperately when our lives change so much at once. Slowly but surely, get back to your former routine if it made you happy or start a fresh one.

Try new experiences

Usually, we make tough decisions why family, lovers or friends because we don't feel like we can be ourselves truly. Are you starting to feel slightly more stable on your feet? Order your legs to move around and try new things! On top of being a great distraction, it will lift up your heart, help you find out who you really are and get closer to who you want to be.

There are NO freaking rules.

Related to our current cases: we are conditioned to think we have to believe a certain way after any life events. Truth is, you have to do what makes you happy. And if it doesn't feel right to others, well that's toobad for them. Don't let a chance of happiness run away from you if it's knocking at your door.

roll up your sleeves and Take the time you need to rebuild yourself. you will be happier for it in the long run. We are sending you love, are willing to share our icecream and you can call us anytime if you feel like dancing on Britney Spears from 2008.

When your passion is your job: the 'Meh' syndrome

Turning your passion into a full-time job. It's a lot of people's dream. Everyone deserves to wake up energized, ready to conquer their day with a smile and be happy to start working. We are part of the "lucky" ones, we've made it happen by opening Scandaleuse full time a year ago. Yet, being a photographer full-time (or any creative careers for that matter) can also burst your creative bubble.

"Submerged: Pisces / Aquarius" by Deanna Colosimo

Meet your Little Muse

I like to think that we all have a little muse that follows us around. I picture mine as a mini-me who throws ideas out of nowhere. She's the one that's like "hey let's cover that model in pink glitter and put her under the rain okay? It'll be awesome!!". She has taken me on some glorious photoshoots, and sometimes, I have had to ignore her because seriously, this idea was way too insane. But the thing with muses is that if you shut them up too often, they just go somewhere else. See you sucker.

We wrote a blog post a while ago about dealing with creative funk when you are doubting your work and feel like you can't seem to produce anything good. Well this is a different kind of funk: it's the "meh" syndrome. Your drive has been AWOL, like it's on a vacation in Mexico or something. And Fanny and I have contaminated.

The "meh" wall is silently building itself.

Without you noticing. Sneaky SOB.

Truth is, we have been insanely busy with both of our boudoir and wedding divisions, working our first wedding workshop, booking sessions, finding new locations, taxes, admin tasks. There is no one else but us behind Scandaleuse, so naturally we have to take care of the not-so-fun stuff on a regular basis. No surprise here, welcome to Managing your business 101.

Anyway, it felt like something was wrong but I just didn't know what it was. I have been feeling constantly tired, my excitement for our current projects was close to the ground. The energy I had for new projects was slowly being shattered by real life, unnecessary stress and unreliable people (YES I SAID IT!), making the process a lot less enjoyable. Picture your little muse pulling on your sleeve to get attention and you flicking her away because, hey, you don't have time, alright?!.

The "oh sh*t" moment.

I was sitting in my living-room/office, scrolling through Instagram & Pinterest and I realized I was dodging any beautiful and creative posts from other photographers. Why? Because it gave me a weird feeling in my stomach that I had been shutting down for a little while. The ugly truth is that I was feeling envious. Envious of artists showcasing their awesome work when I felt like mine was just "meh". I was not looking at other peoples' work because I didn't want to see better work than mine. After all, we pride ourselves to push our own creativity limits here and this made me realize that we hadn't done it in what felt like an eternity. I mean reeeeally done it.

We had just stopped putting our creativity first. Which is super ironic, considering that our creativity is our bread and butter. It is why people hire us to begin with.

But life got in the way, we are dealing with other things that, yes, need to be done, but have been taking all of our time, leaving no room for brainstorming crazy ideas like we used to. The only moment my drive was back was when we were actually shooting with a client, I guess Little Muse is responsible for that too.

It is time to grab the bull by its horns.

We have been thinking outside the box our entire lives and there is no way that Scandaleuse becomes "just" a job with standard quality. We swore to make it exceptional for every session (that's actually why we shoot in different locations) and we lost sight of it for a second.

Making your passion your career involves turning it into something quite commercial to appeal to the masses. Because hey, you gotta make some $$$, your work needs to be consistent, and not everyone wants an insane photoshoot concept.

But we need to make a crazy idea come to life once in a while. We need to do shoots for fun and more importantly: we need to make time for it. So I started my own list of super cool ideas for shoots that may not happen immediately, but are here when I will need them. I have put one into place already, and I had forgotten how much fun putting together different photoshoot styles is. It is thrilling and I know I want to live my life that way.

Little Muse is back, baby, and she's ready to rock.

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Camera Roll - March 2018

If you follow us on social media, you can see that we try to go to multiples events, exhibits and other fun stuff around the city. To keep this motivation going and share even more with you, we are starting a monthtly Camera Roll in which we will show you some glimpse of what we have been up to.

Since we just started the concept, we definitely have to get better at taking (and saving!) more pictures. Duly noted for April!

We celebrated Juliette's birthday with a pretty colorful treat

Fanny took me to Versus Coffee to get a very Instagramable latte! Check them out at Adelaide/Church.

Femmes en Or down at the city hall

On March 8th, we went down to the city hall to listen to 5 women entrepreneure to celebrate International Women's Day. Francophone event organized by Oasis Centre des Femmes. On top of meaningful conversations, we also got a chance to see the Chamber of Council. They gave us way too much power.

Babes who Brunch

The Ace Class is a collective of women, originally from Calgary, who activate, cultivate and empower each other. We went to their first Torontonian brunch at the Gladstone, in which we met Julie Harrish, founder of 6ix cycle, whom you might meet sooner than later around here...

Rocked with Deadset Society

Just because we are all about girl power doesn't mean we don't love good rock bands. Not gonna lie, Deadset Society has a special place in our hearts since we did their first promo shoot a year ago. They don't play a lot in the city, so when they do, you can make sure we are there. And you should too.
(we didn't take any photos - ugh - so thanks Michael Amaral for the pic!)

Women & Fitness Panel

As you may know, Fanny and I are both into fitness via our aerial silks passion, so when we bumped into this event at the Love Child Social House, we just had to go. We heard 5 very interesting panelists, got rubbed by MyoDetox, and met the beautiful Jessie & Chloe (same, you will likely meet them soon!)

Dreaming Big & Being Bold

Again, Eventbrite is a good source for events like this. Dreaming Big, Being Bold is a book gathering multiple author's life experiences, aiming to motivate you by their stories. We have met so many insightful people during that evening. Not gonna lie, almost 90% of people were from London, ON and were fairly surprised to see random people (aka us!) coming in. Oh well, we're pretty curious and it was a nice discovery!

Our one year anniversary is coming up!

Yep, that's right! On April 4th, it's Scandaleuse's birthday! We are working on a video you shall see soon!

She Leads Conference by Her Campus

The conference brought together five female reporters to discuss the topic of women in journalism in Hart House at the University of Toronto. While we are not in this industry at all (and not even students at U of T for that matter), it was super interesting to learn more about female journalist's everyday's accomplishments & struggles. Best advice: “report like women, publish like men.”

Well, ladies & gentlemen, that's pretty much it for this month! Going to events regularly is our 2018 challenge and so far, we've been doing pretty good. Follow us on our instagram to see these in real times & feel free to message us to tag along!

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