How To Be Your Most Magnificent-Self

We were very tempted to write “badass-self” because for us it has such a powerful meaning. But apparently the definition of BADASS is not super positive, so let’s go with MAGNIFICENT!

It is no secret that when you feel confident about yourself, you achieve more and are less afraid to do things in general. Wouldn’t be amazing to be able to put our self-doubt in the garbage and feel confident all the time? Hell yes!

You build confidence by being and doing!

Confidence comes in waves, and it takes practice to keep it up. It follows our emotions and gets triggered every time we face failures, disappointments, and frustration. On top of that, the media and people can also make our confidence drops if we pay too much attention to the external noises (*cough: people’s judgment).

To avoid those negative feelings and make sure you stay confident in your life, you have to live it by your own rules and make sure you stay true to yourself (it’s time to stop being a people pleaser, for example). If you are thinking:

“Ok ladies, you are right in theory, but all of this sounds vague to me. How do you stay authentic when you are not sure of who you are or what you want to begin with?!”.

We get that feeling of confusion as we have been there. And honestly, it still happens now and then because Juliette and I never really settle for an easy and quiet life. The more you experience life, the more you grow, therefore you constantly reevaluate who you are. It can be tiring, but is always exhilarating.

Even if those self-discovery journeys are very personal, we want to share with you what have been working for us so far and the values that we think are important in order to stay authentic to ourselves:

Stop fearing what people think of you!

Let’s start with this, as this is the most common reason that stops people from being themselves: others.

There are two things you need to understand, and we wish someone had told us that when we were teenagers… It would have changed a lot of things for Juliette and me:

• People will always judge you. It doesn’t matter how you dress up, if you are a good or a bad person, what you do for a living, or how you live your life, someone will always disagree with your choices. It is IMPOSSIBLE TO PLEASE EVERYONE.

• People project their own limits on you. How many times have people told you you will never be able to make one of your dream come true? Many times right! They don’t believe you can make it because they cannot do it themselves. Their opinion of you is based on their own experiences, limits, fears, and failures.

Isn’t it mind-blowing? This is why what people think of you is not important. You will never be happy if you let people dictate your life.

Don’t take life too seriously!

Who said that because we are adults we cannot let our inner child out and play without worrying of what others will think? It is sad to want to do something but stop ourselves from doing it because it is not proper or acceptable as an adult.

We say “fuck it!”. Dance like nobody is watching, go twirl under the rain, laugh and cry, make noises or a little dance when you eat something delicious, believe in fairies and mermaids if you want to…

Having a huge imagination and being silly doesn’t make you less of an adult, but it will for sure make you feel more relax and happier.

via GIPHY

Do things that make you feel proud of yourself…

… and don’t hide it from others (yes, even if you are afraid those activities are inappropriate for your age, gender, or profession).

As boudoir photographers, we hear it often from our clients who do a shoot but don’t want to show their pictures to anyone in case people might think it is too sexy or slutty. No one has the right to judge when it comes to personal choices and preferences.

So go take those sexy pictures, the pole dance class you have been dreaming of, or go buy that outfit that is calling your name even though it is too short, colourful, or sparkly.

As long as you feel good about it, it is all that matters!

Embrace your beautiful-self!

And learn to love your body the way it is! See your body as your friend and stop throwing hate at it. We, women especially, are too focused on the part of our body we don’t like:

“Ugh, I wish I could be thinner, curvier, have more boobs/butt, could change my nose, or be taller, …”

All of this hatred is exhausting! Wouldn’t be better to be able to find ourselves beautiful all the time, instead of worrying of what we look like just because we believe those old school (and BS) beauty standards?

Well, it is about really wanting to love our body and changing the perception we have of ourselves.

Set boundaries with others!

Some people are really good at feeding on your willingness to listen and care for them. When you let them do so, you end up feeling exhausted, overwhelmed, and physically distressed.

You have the right to say no, stop, and/or cut people out of your life if necessary.

This topic deserves a full article, so here is a fascinating blog that will help you set boundaries up. It also works with people who judge you, tell you how you should live your life, or even for your professional life if you feel you deserve a raise or have been asked to do too much for your position.

This is a really hard process, but damn, when you manage to do it, it feels amazing and removes a lot of pressure off your shoulders.

Like we said, it is a personal journey, but we hope those tips will help you to discover your badass-self 😎. And as usual, do not hesitate to share with us in comment if there is anything else you want to add!

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5 outfits you already have for your boudoir shoot

Looking to do a boudoir session but not feeling like going shopping for new pieces? Good news, you don't need to look any further than your own closet to find perfect combinations, whether you are looking for boudoir shoots for women, men or anybody else!

The priority: outfits that make you feel your best and like yourself.

There are two types of boudoir photography: the traditional one starring only lingerie and the more creative one starring anything you feel good in. We are fans of the latter, mostly because we believe that a boudoir session should capture your vibe and your personality. Not everyone feels super sexy wearing lingerie and that's more than okay. Any outfit can be turned into a boudoir one, you just have to show some skin! Here are some examples of pieces we guarantee you already have ready to go!

1) Evening attire

Ladies and gentlemen, it is time to dust off your fancy clothes! Yes, many amazing boudoir shots can be done with formal clothes. For the ladies, a cocktail dress with a strap down, a slit, or even an open zipper will give an amazing femme fatale look. For the gentlemen, an open shirt, an undone tie with maybe a jacket will create this beautiful GQ style shoot.

Bonus: Also grab those one of a kind pieces you fell in love with but don't dare or get to wear! Those can easily bring a lovely twist to your photoshoot. For example: fur coats, anything sheer, sparkly…

2) Your favourite jacket of any kind

Blazer, leather jackets, trench coat… All of these make perfect options to shoot boudoir. Put any of those jackets with nothing under and you are guaranteed a very much badass look one way or another.

3) Your beloved pair of jeans

Jeans are so simple and yet, absolutely timeless for photoshoots. If you love the Calvin Klein atmospheres, you will love posing topless or with a bra with a pair of jeans. Simple, yet efficient,

4) Anything related to your hobbies

One of our personal favourites: take a little glimpse of your hobbies with you! Do you love painting? Bring your apron or covered-in-paint shirt for a spicy artist at work vibe. Do you play the guitar? You have a wonderful prop that doesn't require a very sophisticated outfit. This works for everything you can think of!

5) Your birthday suit

Last but definitely not least: your body is a look in itself! Trying suggested full or partial nudity will leave you feeling the most empowered you have ever felt. This is a decision you can make during your session and while it is not mandatory in a boudoir shoot, it is definitely recommended.

There you go, no need to frenetically shop before your session if you don't feel like it! Your boudoir session is a wonderful opportunity to be creative, so don't hesitate to think outside the box and have fun with your looks! In average, we can personally do around 5 different outfits, so don't be shy!

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How to choose your boudoir photographer

Hi there!

If you are a first timer on our website, welcome to the Scandaleuse family 😀. If it is not your first time reading one of our blogs, know it is nice to have you back here! In both cases, we hope you can find some answers here if you are looking to do a shoot!

When it comes to boudoir photography, you want to make sure you find the perfect photographer to shoot with. Maybe it will be your first time trying boudoir and maybe you feel a bit anxious about it… Nothing to worry about, this feeling is normal! For a lot of people it is already hard to have their pictures taken, so the idea of posing half naked in front of a stranger can be even more nerve-racking even if they really want to try it.

To make sure you get the most out of your boudoir experience, and you feel 100% at ease the day of your shoot, it is really important you find the perfect match: AKA your dream photographer!

Do not necessarily go for the cheapest

Of course prices are important, and we understand not everyone have the budget to do a boudoir shoot since it can be quite of an investment. But if it is something you really want to treat yourself with, there are other factors to take into consideration.

If you go with the cheapest professionals, obviously you will get lower prices, but on the other hand you will sacrifice things that are important and can make your shoot go smoothly. For example, you might get:

• A shorter shoot and be rushed to pose.

  Which can cause you a lot of stress, and you might end up looking tensed on the final pictures.

• A photographer that is new in photography or not really confident in their work.

  The risk is that this person might not be able to pose you properly nor find the best angles during your shoot. An inexperienced photographer might also not know how to guide you and can easily use the wrong words that sometimes can be misleading or not really appropriate!

  They might also not be able to give you what you are looking for if you have specific ideas in mind.

• A lack of quality with the final pictures.

  Such as unbalanced colours and lighting, which affects the colour of your skin and intensify your skin’s texture (including pimples, bruises, cellulite, …). Or a poor editing process. Even if we believe photographers should never change someone’s body (we are not plastic surgeons!), when we edit your pictures we make sure to unify your skin tones or soften tan lines if you have some.

• Low resolution pictures with the photographer’s watermark.

  This means that you would not be able to print them the size you wish and will end up with the photographer’s signature on all of your pictures. If you are looking to have clean prints or a beautiful album in the future, that might be an issue.

Those are a few pointers among other ones. Like anything in life you want to purchase, if you go for a low price, you know you are not going to get the best product or service. In our opinion, it is not something you want to experience with boudoir photography. A cheap shoot is never worth the struggles and disappointment you might get in return. If you really want to treat yourself with a boudoir session but don’t have the budget yet, it is better to wait a bit longer rather than rushing into it.

Also know that payment plans can be an option! We don’t know about the other studios, but on our end we are more than happy to be flexible with payments so you can access the beautiful world of boudoir photography more easily.

Safety first

We wrote a full blog about this very important topic here as we heard some horrific stories happening to some people. We highly suggest reading it or watch the video below:

The recap:

• Avoid Kijiji or Craiglist.
• Always meet with your photographer(s)
• Check the company's reputation with reviews or referrals.
• Have a contract signed and the details of the session laid out before the day of. Everything has to be crystal clear.
• Bring someone with you or let someone know where you will be and when you'll be done.

First impression always matters

Trust your instinct! We mentioned it in the video above, but we want to write here as it is primordial:

Always listen to your guts!

It does not matter what detail triggered that little voice in your head telling you there is something not working with this photographer, just listen to it. Our body usually picks up on people’s energy before our brain does, especially as women (we have a natural protective instinct). So if you feel it is not gonna work out, it probably will not. It is always better to find someone else!

Values are important

Like in any relationships, either it is professional or personal, sharing the same values is important in order to make the most out of the time you will spend together. Since boudoir can be an experience that makes you feel vulnerable, feeling 100% comfortable around the person who is guiding you during your shoot is a must.

If you don’t relate to the message the photographer is sharing through their branding, or you cannot really “recognize” yourself in their work, it is usually a sign this is not a good match.

Contract and privacy release

Even if we love being able to share our clients’ pictures to inspire other people to do a shoot and show the diversity in our clientele, we understand that privacy is important. When choosing a photographer, make sure they have a release option to sign, so they keep your pictures private if you wish to.

Also, you want to make sure to sign a contract that summarize all the details from the shoot and what you are supposed to get. This is to avoid any unpleasant surprises such as change of pricing, hidden fees or any other clauses you were not aware of.

Your vibe should match their style

Every photographer has a personal artistic style, so what you see on a photographer’s website is most likely what you are going to get. Before hiring your photographer, you want to make sure they can give you what you are looking for.

For example, if you are looking for a homey vibe with a nice decors and plants for your pictures background and atmosphere, you don’t want to go for a photographer who mostly shoot in a simple studio on a white background.

Everything has to be crystal clear

Your boudoir experience, from meeting the photographer to getting the finale product (with everything in between), should happen smoothly and you should not feel confused about the process. Never hesitate to ask questions (as long as you respect your photographer’s time) or ask for extra clarification if needed.

Once again, if you feel the photographer you contacted isn’t being really responsive, you might wanna look at other options.

Your boudoir shoot is about you and yourself only! So when you find the perfect photographer that will make you feel like your most badass, sexy, confident, or whatever-else-you-wanna-feel self, you are going to have an amazing experience 😍

We believe boudoir is a life-changing experience, and we cannot wait for you to try it!

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What happens during a boudoir shoot?

If you haven’t done a boudoir shoot yet you might wonder what’s going on during the session. Today, we are sharing with you everything that is happening the day of your shoot!

But before we dive in, let us explain what is Boudoir in case you are not familiar with this term:

A boudoir shoot is a type of photography in which people are showing more skin than traditional portrait photography. The photos are usually intimate, sensual, sexy (but can also be in a more cosy vibe for those who prefer this than being sexy). People have different reasons to do a boudoir shoot, but the most common one is the desire to increase self-confidence (we wrote a blog here that explains it more in details).

Let us guide you first through the basics of our boudoir shoots but read everything to the end as we are sharing about points people don’t necessarily think of!

• We put your favourite music on!

When we meet you on Zoom for an introduction meeting, we tell you to create a playlist with your favourite songs on your phone so you can really put yourself in the mood during your session. Music is a powerful tool to help you relax and have fun.

• We look at your outfits!

During the meeting we previously mentioned, we suggest to you to bring a suitcase full of different outfits and props. Before we start shooting, we spend the first 10 minutes going through what you brought, select your top 3 outfits, and help you mix and match or find ideas for the other pieces.

Seeing your outfits and props is what makes us create scenarios and the different sets we are going to pose you in.

• Let the shoot begin!

This is usually the moment most people are nervous about, especially when they are first timers. But there is nothing to worry about as we pose you and guide you the entire session, and make sure the poses are adapted to your body type and flexibility level. So even if you don’t know how to pose, or are not feeling really good about your body, if you follow our guidance, you let loose and will end up having a lot of fun.

You will see that time flies very quickly during your boudoir session. Since both of us are on the shoot, one of us is always setting up for the next set when the other is shooting, which makes the session flows nicely!

Now that you know the “technical” stuff of what is happening during your shoot, we want to talk to you about what happens to your body and mind!

• You let loose!

Most of the people who contact us to book a session always tell us they are not photogenic and feel very awkward in front of a camera. That is one of the reason they can feel nervous with the idea of trying boudoir photography and can be tensed at the beginning of the shoot. But since we create a fun vibe from the start and take the time to demonstrate the poses, you start to relax and enjoy being photographed. You forgot about not being photogenic and start to rock those poses 😎.

• Your sensuality starts to kick in.

It is not easy for a lot of people to embrace their sensuality, or even dare to think of themselves as sensual beings. Boudoir photography is very powerful for that because it allows you to show the amount of skin you want, let go of the people’s judgment, focus on yourself, and be more in touch with your body. All of this combined helps your sensuality shines!

• You unlock your confidence.

During your boudoir shoot, we also show you how to improve your posture, and this is something you take with you in your everyday life! We will tell you to straighten your back, bring your chest up, make yourself taller, and walk like you own the place. All of those little adjustments help to increase your self-confidence and you remember those for years!

On top of that, you will embrace all of your personalities during your boudoir experience. In 90 minutes, you can go from a cosy vibe to a having a badass attitude, and truly showcase your most fearless, sexy, confident, cute, or whatever else you want to showcase 🔥.

Ready for a shoot with us?

Then we have a great deal on our boudoir shoots, and we are offering you the opportunity to give back as well. If you book your shoot before the end of October (don’t worry, you will have 3 months upon booking to schedule your photoshoot), you will get 10% off our boudoir shoots and part of the proceeds will be donated to The Pink Ribbon boutique to help mastectomy survivors afford prosthetics.

All the details below!

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You are always worthy of respect

Disclaimer: we will be chatting about being true to who you are and standing up for yourself in this post. Needless to say, we are not referring to any behaviours involving harming yourself or other people.

Respect is a must to give, but also to receive!

Why do people lose respect for others to begin with?

Because they don't share the same values or standards. Of course, if we are talking about racism, slut-shaming, sexism and everything else falling into the hatred & discrimation category, this is a different topic. This time, we are referring to choices that YOU make for YOUR own well-being that don't necessarily get "approval" from others. Maybe for certain people, the fact that you practice a certain sport for example can be a reason to lose respect (any pole-dancers out there? Why mess with someone who can bend around a piece of metal to begin with?!) 

But here is the thing: those indicators that people use to judge you are actually not about you per se, they are about them. They are created by their own conditioning, insecurities, past experiences and so on.

So you might as well take a step back and not let it affect you as much because…

Not everyone is going to like you, so you might as well do you!

That can be a tough pill to swallow (yep, for us too): not everyone likes you. Even if you didn't do anything to them. 

Instead of trying to bend over backwards to please everyone, it is much better to surround yourself with people who support you and share the similar values you have. You will be much happier around them, you will build stronger connections, but most importantly, you will feel like yourself.

Embracing who you are is a must for your own happiness. You don't have the energy, room, or time, for people who disrespect you for being you. No one else but YOU is eligible to judge your choices and decisions. 

Don’t let people make you feel like your are worthless!

Your hobbies, education, sexual preferences, or any choices you make related to your appearance, you name it, should NOT affect your credibility.

We often hide or dismiss some aspects of our personalities in order to "fit in". We see it constantly in our industry since we photograph people in a way that can be seen "provocative" by (narrow-minded) traditional minds. Most of our clients are looking to regain confidence and want to feel sexy in their own skin. And some of them want to share their photos with the world as a way to stand up for themselves loud and clear.  Yet, a good 50% don’t dare to do so due to the fear of losing credibility with the people they love and appearing less professional with people from their work if they happen to see the photographs of their shoot.

Don't get us wrong, if you wish to keep your pictures (or any projects) just to yourself because it's part of your own journey, that's totally cool. But if you stop yourself from showing your photographs because you are afraid of what people would say, then you need to realize that you are not the problem. The people judging you are. 

We are strong believers that, if someone is trying to make you feel small and if you just don't give it any attention, try to defend or dismiss it, the "judger" will feel so damn ridiculous that they will end up giving themselves a taste of their own medicine. 

To give you an example, since we use ourselves for our boudoir advertising, we have heard some snarky comments about how "we are just posing naked online". By just saying "yeah, so what? I think I look damn good too!", we remove any possibility for a judgmental response.

You cannot shame someone who is confident in their choices. You cannot affect someone with your judgement if they don’t allowing it. Confidence is truly a super power my friends!

No one can fit in just one box and that is pretty neat! 

Back in the day, even maybe a decade ago, we were supposed to fit nicely in one category and stay in it. Nowadays, people can be so many things at once and it's such a great time to be alive. Thanks to this, we are removing pressure, and changing our standards and expectations.

We are even changing the definition of power by making it about standing up for ourselves and being open about it. We are kicking the stigmas back to oblivion.

Would it shock you if your lawyer had a passion for making macarons? No. What if your dentist was fond of doing trapeze? Would it change their qualifications? No. If anything, it would make them more approachable.

Embrace your unique-self and make your own contribution by being proud of who you are and what you do. It will serve those coming after you.

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Posing: a powerful tool to build self-confidence

Hello lovely reader! Today we want to talk to you about posing (during a photoshoot but also in your everyday life). As boudoir photographers we had to write a blog on that topic! We know a lot of peeps feel awkward in front of a camera so the idea of posing can be nerve-wracking. But keep reading because today’s blog is gonna help you feel more confident and this is something we all need from time to time 😎

Shoulders down, boobs up!

Self-confidence is a vital aspect of our overall well-being. It not only influences our choices, actions, and interactions with others, but also shapes how we perceive ourselves. When you look online to get some advice on how to become more confident, you can find a lot of ideas that contribute toward that goal. But there is one element that is often overlooked: the way we pose our bodies.

The way we position our bodies and present ourselves physically significantly impacts how we feel about ourselves. In fact, studies have shown that adopting certain poses can have a direct influence on our level of confidence.

MAKING YOURSELF SMALL VS POWER POSING:

If you consistently adopt closed-off poses, with crossed arms or slouched posture, you communicate to your brain that you are shrinking and feeling vulnerable. These poses can reinforce negative self-perceptions and inhibit your confidence. When you physically appear small, your minds mirror this with feelings of insignificance and insecurity.

On the other hand, when you strike a pose that exudes power and openness, your brain responds by releasing hormones associated with confidence and dominance. This phenomenon is known as the famous "power posing." By expanding your body and taking up space, you send signals to your brain that you are in a position of strength, empowerment, and self-assurance. Which leads to more success and better outcomes in various aspects of your life. We don’t know for you but we take that over the previous point 💪.

Son next time you go outside, think about that! Put on one of your favourite outfits and walk in the street like you own it. You’ll see how powerful it makes you feel!

Boudoir photography is your best ally

Posing also plays a significant role in your body image. Many people struggle with accepting and embracing themselves the way they are, so by intentionally posing in ways that highlight your beautifully natural body, you can boost your self-love. This is when boudoir photography comes in!

When you do a boudoir shoot you are not only getting pretty pictures of yourself. You are doing an experience with long lasting results that helps you reclaim your self-worth and celebrate everything that makes you YOU (yes, your body included!). During the shoot, your photographer will help you pose accordingly to your body type and the vibe you want to create so you can see yourself the way you never did before!

Of course receiving your photographs is the icing on the cake and act as a great reminder on how gorgeous and badass you look! Plus it shows how courageous you were to try a not-so-easy experience (not everyone can “strip down” in front of a stranger and have their pictures taken) 💛

Since confidence comes from within and is developed through a combination of self-acceptance, self-care, and personal growth, improving your posture alone will not magically make you the most confident person in the world. But being aware of how you hold yourself is a valuable tool to include in your self-confidence journey!

If it is not done already, we would love to have you join our community and stay in the loop for more empowering content. The simplest way is to sign up to our weekly newsletter below 😘

How to prep for your boudoir shoot

Congrats, you did it! You gathered the courage to book your boudoir shoot and now, the official preparation can officially begin! While it can be a little nerve-wracking, prepping for your shoot is very exciting and a big part of how confident and comfortable you will feel during your session. Here are some tips to help you get ready both for your mind and your body.

On the mindset side of things

Chances are, you are already in a "screw it, let's do this” mindset if you already booked your session, but if it was a little quiet, it's time to make it roar! Don't let your pre-shoot jitters take over and remind yourself of your "no f.. given” attitude. This is your time to let loose and have fun!

Leave your body alone!

More often than not, we hear "I need to lose/gain a few pounds before my shoot”. This is not the right way to go about it.

If you want to take advantage of this session to get a good balance in your life and feel your best, like managing your stress, set up better nutrition habits and movement and improve your sleep, all the power to you. But if you are going to kill yourself at the gym in hopes to change your body, you are setting yourself up for failure.

Let's say you do manage to trim or bulk up in time, chances are you will go back to your regular self shortly after your session. Getting your photos might get you excited at first, but after a little while, you may not feel so good about them and end up comparing your body then and now.

Your photos are meant to be a keep sake, a long-term reminder of how beautiful and confident you are, in your every day body. Just let your body be and place your focus other aspect of your session, like what oufits make you feel your best.

Choose your outfits carefully

When selecting outfits for your boudoir shoot, choose pieces that you feel comfortable and confident in. Don't be afraid to mix and match different pieces to create a unique and personalized look. We can do up to 5 outfits in one session, and we definitely encourage you to have different vibes to illustrate different facets of your personality.

They don't have to be regular lingerie either! Any outfit can be turned into a boudoir one, and we will help you style it as such.

Practicing posing can help

Even if it isn't your job to know what to do in front of the camera and that we will guide you through it all, it can be helpful to practice some poses at home in front of a mirror.

Don't worry too much about it, but don't be scared to experiment just a little, check some poses and angles you might like. It will make you feel more confident once you are in front of the lens.

A few extra quickies before we end this…

Prep a playlist

Music has a huge influence on our moods, so definitely make yourself a playlist of songs that make you feel sexy & confident!

Watch those tan lines!

Bad tan lines can really ruin a look and are pretty much impossible to remove properly in post-production. If you are planning on hitting the beach before your shoot, make sure to either use sunblock or sunbathe au naturel…

Gather some inspo

Whether it is for makeup, outfits or poses, don't hesitate to fall into a Pinterest rabbit hole and save anything that catch your eye. Dismiss the perfect bodies and poses and just focus on the whole ambiance of the shot. It is so nice to get inspired with other looks and for us, it is helpful to see where you head is at!

Follow those little tips & tricks and we guarantee you'll have the best session ever! We have plenty more tips & tricks that we share with all of our new clients and we are always happy to answer any questions. If you would like to connect, head over to this link!

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“I’ll do a shoot when I will have the perfect body!”

The following is the most common reason that stops people from trying a boudoir shoot (honestly, if someone were to give us a loony every time we heard that sentence, we will be rich by now 💰), and it usually goes like this:

“I want to do a shoot so badly but I need to lose weight first!”

NO YOU DON’T NEED TO. You don’t need to look thinner, you don’t need to be more muscular, you don’t need to go through plastic surgery.

Don’t get us wrong, if for example your goal is to do a boudoir-fitness shoot then of course you will want to showcase your muscles. But if you want to do a shoot for yourself, to feel more confident and sensual, then do it the way you are: beautiful au naturel 💛.

The eternal search for the “perfect” body

Because of classic boudoir photographs, it is not surprising to hear that so many people believe they have to lose weight, be more fit, or change their body one way or another, in order to do a shoot. We are in 2023 and body diversity is still not well represented in our field. What you can mostly see are heavily photoshopped professional models with the same body type.

This makes it hard for most people to imagine they could do a boudoir shoot even if they don’t look like those models. What’s even harder is that it does not stop at boudoir but is everywhere we look, especially with social media. And even thought a lot of people fight for body diversity acceptance, we are still not there yet.

The belief that a body is beautiful only if it follows certain standards is so deeply rooted that it will take years to disappear, and will stop only if people learn to accept their body and love it the way it is.

Changing your body for a boudoir shoot is a dangerous game

Let say for example you don’t like the way you look because you think you are too big and you believe that you have to attain a certain number in order to do a shoot. You will work hard, maybe for months, to reach to your boudoir goal, and once you get there you finally do your shoot. Awesome you did it, but can you guess what happens next?

Most likely there will be two scenarios:

• #1: This experience was kind of a wake up call for you. Fitness becomes an important habit in your life. You feel motivated to keep working on this new body of yours and are very happy about it.

• #2 (and the most common): you don’t get any pleasure from that fitness journey so you stop and your body goes back to its natural shape and size.

Creating new habits, especially around body transformation, is hard and for a lot of people not worth the struggles and time around it.

What’s “dangerous” with changing your body before a shoot is that when you will look at those photographs in the future (and you still don’t feel confident about yourself) it will triggers tons of negative emotions because what you see on pictures doesn’t reflect who you are and what you look like. You will probably think you were more beautiful at that time and this will make your confidence completely drop.

In our opinion boudoir photography is about body acceptance, self-confidence, sensuality, and empowerment. Basically it is about accepting your whole badass-self!

Au naturel is better

Learning to accept your natural body and find beauty even with the parts you like less or hate is possible and requires practice. It is about changing the perspective you have regarding what you look like and running far far away from the destructive fashion industry’s beauty standards.

Also if you love social media, start following people who have the same body type as you and who inspire you. Follow people who are authentic with strong and human values. People who teach about body acceptance and self-love. But if you start feeling jealous about what you see online, then it is time to take a break from social media.

Your body is not your enemy. Be kind, gentle, and loving with it!

Be the same way as you are when your best friend is having a hard time: compassionate. Throwing hate or negative feeling at yourself will only make you feel worst. Only you can change the narrative 😘

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The importance of knowing how to highlight yourself in lingerie

As boudoir photographers we see so many different types of lingerie during our shoots and most of the time our clients’s favourite pieces are the ones that fit them the best. If you are used to wear lingerie, you know how uncomfortable pieces that don’t fit can be and you also know it is not that easy to find the perfect match. We don’t know for you but we weren’t taught, when we were younger, about what bras sizes or panty shapes were the best for our body type. It took us years, plenty of mistakes, and experts, to finally realize we were not wearing the right sizes.

First of all let’s clarify something:

There are so much more body shapes and sizes than what the fashion industry made us believe. Back then, when Juliette and I were teenagers and looking to wear our first bras, we were taught about all the common sizes and that we were supposed to fit in one of those (and when your body change, you find a new size and stick to it until your body changes again). But it wasn’t that simple!

It happened so many times we couldn’t find the perfect fit because we were in between sizes (for example having a bras that has the under band too tight but the cup too big). In those moments it was easy to feel like shit and see ourselves as women with large chest but small boobies 😟. Can you guess what happen when those feelings keep pilling up? Just a typical fall of our body confidence! All the bullshit about the “perfect bodies” was so deeply rooted that it never occurred to us that the problem didn’t come from our bodies but from the restricted rules of the fashion industry.

It is very important to understand the lack of body confidence has been a business for decades. The worst you feel about yourself the most likely you are to buy stuff that will “fix” the way you look (diets, plastic surgeries, props to change your body, beauty products to make you look younger or hairless,… sadly we could keep going). Making clothes that perfectly fit only a small portion of the population is one more of those marketing tricks that makes you feel bad about your body.

So next time you are trying on lingerie (or any pieces of clothing) and you are having a really hard time to find a size that works for you, remember that it is probably because the design of the collection isn’t cut for your shape and it is best to try something else.

Alright let’s go back to the main topic of this blog as we got a bit carried away (if you are part of our community you know by now we like to dig deeper with our topics and are passionate about destroying those old school believes 💪).

Why is it important to have lingerie that fits?

Both Juliette and I love lingerie. How designers play with the textures, all the styles you can find, and how sexy and confident lingerie can make you feel. But not every cuts are suitable for everyone and as we mentioned previously it is hard to know what shape is the best for our body. But when you find those precious pieces, it is heaven on Earth!

Here are 3 main reasons why having the right lingerie is a game changer:

Comfort

This is probably one of the most important reason. Wearing a bras with an underwire that digs into your skin or panties that are too tight they give you a frontal wedgie can really ruin your day. Even if those pieces are the most beautiful lingerie you ever saw, it is not worth putting your comfort on the side.

When you wear lingerie in your every day life, you don’t want it to be a struggle. Good lingerie makes itself discrete, almost like you are not wearing anything!

Look

Number two on our list is the way it looks on you. We are not talking about the style or colours but how you can easily notice when someone is wearing lingerie that doesn’t fit them (either it is too big or two small).

For example, too small panties can create body rolls you don’t have. And a bras that is too tight will make your breast overflow it which is very visible underneath your clothe. And that also works for bras that are too big revealing gaps in the cups.

When the lingerie you wear doesn’t properly highlight your curves but instead accentuate the parts of your body you might have a hard time to like, it doesn’t help with self-love.

Confidence

Which bring us to our last point: body confidence!

When you wear lingerie that suits you like a glove, that is light as a feather and smooth as a cloud, and that highlights perfectly all of your curves, it really makes you feel like a goddess. You start to see your body in a different light and realize that there is nothing wrong with it.

We’re telling you, it is like a super power! You put it on and suddenly there is a wave of sexyness coming at you that makes you say: “Damn I look good!” 😉.

If you are thinking: “ok ladies all of this sounds amazing but how can I actually know what size and shape of lingerie works best for me?” Well don’t worry we got you! We are partnering with Gigi’s House of Frills on July 8th and created a unique and intimate event that includes a semi-private fitting session, lingerie shopping, and some bubbly & bite-sized deserts. It will be a lot of fun and we hope you can join us:

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6 reasons why men should do a dudeoir shoot

Raise your hand if the idea of trying a dudeoir shoot is appealing but you are not sure why you would do a shoot 🙋‍♂️. Well keep reading because this blog is definitively for you!

Wait, boudoir photography is only for women no?

First of all let's demystify boudoir photography and the fact a lot of people believe it is only for women. To make it simple a boudoir shoot is an indoors or outdoors photography session, in which you show more skin than in a regular photoshoot. It can be done in lingerie, or any outfit truly, as long as you show some skin. But wearing only a piece a fabric, or nothing at all is also an option.

You do not need to have any modelling experience, neither be of a certain age, body shape, or gender, in order to try boudoir photography. The only thing you need is your handsome-self (and talented photographers - AKA us 😉).

Is dudeoir photography different than boudoir?

Nope. The term dudeoir was invented so men can relate more to this type of photography by being less afraid to end up with pictures of themselves that could potential be too feminine for their taste. But the goal stays the same:

Feeling empowered and sexy!

It is not because this industry showcases mostly women that you cannot do a boudoir shoot as a man. Either you want very masculine and moody pictures of yourself to highlight your virility, or want a shoot that is more airy to show your softer side, your session should be done the way you want, for whatever reasons you have.

Speaking of reasons…

Since boudoir photography isn’t common for men, most of them held back from doing a shoot because they don't know why they would even give it a try.

But here are a few reasons:

• Accept and appreciate your body the way it is

Media put so much pressure on people with all the “beauty standards” that having a clouded vision of our body doesn't only happen to women, it is universal! Most of us wish parts of our body could be different:

“I wish I could be more muscular, thinner, taller, have more boobs, a bigger weenie,…”

The truth is that we should be able to love the way we look naturally instead of wanted to be different. When you learn to accept your body the way it is, you stop comparing yourself to others and start building a stronger confidence.

• Boost your confidence

Speaking of confidence :)… A boudoir shoot is a challenge by itself. It can make you feel vulnerable and pushes you out of your comfort zone. But this is good as it helps you grow and develop that confidence we all need.

Can you guess why it is important to be confident?

It gives you the strength to go through life challenges and make the world your oyster… Not bad right!

We like to say that once you strip down in front of two strangers, nothing else in life can stop you ;)

• Celebrate yourself

This is probably the first reason that pushes most of our clients to do or redo a boudoir shoot.

We all need to celebrate our awesome-selves. Every little or big victories, body transformations (new hairstyle, tattoos,…), and even birthdays. Basically anything that makes us happy in our everyday life.

Be your own cheerleader and treat yourself with unique experiences!

• Push the boundaries regarding your masculinity and femininity

Yes you read that right! Every single human being has both a feminine and masculine side. Not a lot of men dare to tap into their femininity but your feminine side is a huge asset in your life. It keeps you grounded and helps you simply enjoy what is around you. You become more aware of what all of your senses are picking up, which helps you develop new perspectives and your creativity.

• Bring down the pressure around men.

The pressure around men is quite insane: “Don’t cry! Be strong! Suck it up! Don't be girly!…” If you guys dare to show a bit of sensitivity, you are right away put in the “weak” category.

You have the right to be whatever and whoever you want. But in order to change mentalities, like women, you have to stand up and fight! You have to be willing to tap and show your sensitivity, to make it normal.

By allowing yourself to be more vulnerable and not being afraid to show emotions (rather than always trying to be strong all the time), you will slowly but surely remove some clichés attributed to men.

You won't be only be doing yourself a favour, you will do one for your fellas too.

• A gift for your partner

Even if a boudoir shoot should always be done for yourself first, using it as a gift for your partner is always a cool extra bonus, and a great way to spice your relationship up. I mean who wouldn't be amazingly surprised to see sexy pictures of their lover, fiancé, or spouse?!

Now that you read all the reasons for doing a dudeoir shoot, what are you waiting for to book your shoot 😉 You can find here the details about our sessions for men!

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Stop avoiding your reflection

Have you ever taken the time to stop in front of a mirror and just look at yourself without any judgment? We are not talking about looking at yourself while you do your makeup or to check if you have a piece of lettuce stuck between your teeth. But really looking at your reflection for a certain amount of time with kindness , love, and gratitude, for that fucking strong being you are while dealing with the pain life can put on your path.

Probably not right! Well it is quite normal as we have been conditioned from a very young age to not like our body and avoid our own reflection. We have been told by the media and loved ones to:

• not take too much room and stay quiet, otherwise you are asking for attention;

• not show too much confidence because it will mean you think you are better than everyone else;

• not compliment our own body or look, so people don’t think you are narcissistic.

On top of that past traumas destroy our sel-estime and create body dysmorphia, which makes it even harder to not ditch our reflection every time we pass in front of a mirror. But when you do take those minutes to look at yourself in the eyes and look at your beautiful body, magical things happens.

Let us tell you a little story:

Mirrors are not your ennemies

We had a boudoir shoot last year with one of our Scandal, Sarah, that we met a few years ago (if it is your first time here, we use the word “Scandal” for our clients or people within our community 😎). She was first part of a very creative shoot of the theme of fire, but then shot with us again for a regular boudoir shoot.

It was really nice during that boudoir shoot to create photographs around her personality and style compared to the first “fire shoot” which was designed to follow our ideas.

During that last session, we asked Sarah to pose in front of a mirror and look at herself and her body for a few minutes. There was a lot of emotions in her eyes and she later shared with us that shot was important and a huge moment for her":

“I had to look at my own reflection for an extended period of time, most of us don’t do that! I was able, considering I had so many body image issues because of my experiences, to look at my own reflection and feel positive, beautiful, strong, powerful, and confident, the entire time. And that has never happened to me before!”

This healing impact boudoir photography have on people is one of the reasons why we love doing it. And we cannot be more grateful to work with people who trust us enough to share their vulnerability with us 💛

Let’s give it a try, shall we?

We cannot write about something for you to try, especially for an exercise that can be hard to do if you don’t feel comfortable with your body, without trying it ourselves first. Personally I, Fanny, haven’t done this exercise in a long time so it will be interesting to see how it makes me feel. Both Juliette and I will share with you our honest thoughts!

But first here is the idea:

• do this exercise when you are alone at home, you need peace and quiet;

• you can do it fully naked or fully clothed, or an in-between, it does not really matter;

• now look at your body with love and compassion, remember it has been carrying you since you were born and allows you to be alive.

• Once you are done with the previous step, look at yourself in the eyes and put a hand on your heart. Think of everything you have accomplished so far and be proud of yourself.

How does it make you feel?

If this sounds to woo-woo for you, feel free to adapt it to your liking. The goal of this exercise is to help you reconnect with your body but also your mind, and help you feel better when you are feeling down about yourself.

Disclaimer: the results will never be the same when you try it because your mood and mental impact a lot the way we see yourself. It also varies from one person to another.

Our experience

Fanny

Those past months have been really hard (and I know I am not the only one who feels that way). I have been feeling disconnected from my body for probably over a year now, lost touch with my sensuality, and keep feeling this inside void. So tonight I decided to try this exercise after my shower because this is the moment when I feel the most relax.

I looked deep in my eyes and focused on all my qualities, reminding to myself all the things I have accomplished and whispering kinda of a pep talk to increase my self-esteem. Then run my fingers on my face, neck, arms, and chest, not in a sexual way but only to feel that connection I need. While keeping a soft smile on my face.

I needed that kindness to erase all the negative thoughts I can have about myself and it felt really good.

Juliette

I never look at myself more than 30 seconds in a mirror because it is really easy for me to become very critical over my body, especially when I don’t have a mirror with proper lighting. Maybe I could work on it, but lately I have been feeling really good about the way I look and don’t wanna take the risk to fuck it up by looking too long at myself.

But this time I made the effort to stay in front of my mirror a tad longer and I felt grateful for what my body does for me, especially since I am 31 years old. I know it is not going to last since I am getting older (thinking how broken I will be when hitting 90 😅) ! I am also very proud as I never thought I would ever be able to have this type of body. I am referring to a muscular body not a body following traditional beauty standards.

After years of having body dysmorphia phases, those are the best reminders that help me to not focus on little details but what is actually important!

That is it for today, we hope this blog will bring extra sunshine to your life or help you reconnect with your beautiful-self if you need it.

If you decide to give it a try, let us know in the comments how you felt, and don’t forget to sign up to our newsletter below if it is not done already ⬇️

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Why don't we provide lingerie for our boudoir shoots?

We often receive inquiries in which people ask us if we provide lingerie during our boudoir shoots. It is indeed pretty common for Canadian boudoir photographers to offer this service (definitively not common in France thought so we would be curious to know what photographers in other countries think about that). We are assuming people like the idea of having access to more “luxurious” lingerie sets so we understand why this type of service can be wanted, but it is not something we are doing nor plan to do in the future.

Our reasons are based on our branding and personal taste, we are absolutely not denigrating our fellow photographers for choosing to provide lingerie to their clients!

Before scrolling down, can you guess our 3 main reasons?

1. Body Diversity

   The most important reason is that if we were to provide lingerie during our shoots the logistic will be insane for us. Since we opened Scandaleuse 6 years ago, our clientele includes people of every shapes and sizes, so if we were to include lingerie in our sessions we would need to have a lingerie store in order to keep being body inclusive and give our clients plenty of choices.

   We think providing lingerie is a great option for photographers who photograph mostly the same type of bodies (such as professional models for example) or the ones who only want to offer a few pieces to their clients.

2. Choice Of Outfits

   Second reason is that, in our opinion it is important to not feel like you are wearing a disguise when you do a boudoir shoot. We always suggest to our Scandals (AKA our clients) to wear outfits that makes them feel like their most confident, sensual, sexy, badass, or whatever else - self they want to feel. We tell them to be creative and think outside the box when it comes to their boudoir outfits, especially if a traditional set of lingerie is not their thing.

   We do not want to take pictures of people wearing the same outfits. Providing the lingerie to our Scandals would be too restrictive which is the opposite of what Scandaleuse is about: allowing yourself to give the spotlight to all your personalities instead of making you fit into a mold!

3. Is It Really Hygienic?

   Even it is safe to assume all pieces are being washed after each clients when photographers provide lingerie during their shoots, we personally don’t find this practice is super hygienic. Maybe some people don’t mind it but personally I, Fanny, would not feel comfortable wearing thongs or panties multiple people wear before me (unless I washed them myself to make sure it is really clean).

   When you do a shoot, especially if it is your first time, you want to make sure you are as relax as you can, so if you spend half of the session worrying about the cleanliness of what you are wearing it could make you tense and ruin your boudoir shoot.

   If you choose to shoot with a studio that provide the lingerie for you, make sure to ask how they clean their lingerie and how often it has been worn.

Making our boudoir shoots as flexible and inclusive as we can has been our goal since day one and we are very proud of ourselves for keeping it this way!

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Sentences you should never hear during a boudoir shoot

We opened Scandaleuse Photography 6 years ago and let us tell you that we have read and heard some pretty disturbing things coming from other photographers in the boudoir industry. We remember a few years ago we read on a boudoir photography website that this company could “make you be desirable again” 🤢. We were shocked to see that some professionals still believe that a boudoir shoot’s purpose is only to please a partner and make sure this partner will find you desirable. Pardon our french, but what a load of BS.

Let’s clear this old school belief once and for all: a boudoir shoot should be done for yourself first! Of course it is always a cool idea to show the pictures to your partner, even gifting them the photographs, but we see this as an extra bonus.

Your boudoir shoot should be a safe space

Boudoir photography is such a liberating experience but not the easiest (especially if it is your first time) as posing half naked in front of a stranger is probably not something you do everyday. So from the message on the photographer’s website to their guidance during the day of the shoot, you should feel at ease and safe.

It is really easy for some photographers, especially if they are used to work with professional models, to forget that not everyone feel comfortable in front of a camera and not everyone have experience posing. So when they work with people who pose for the first time, they can easily misguide them or become impatient, and end up saying the wrong things while guiding their clients.

Here are 5 sentences you will never hear us say during a boudoir shoot:

• “This doesn’t look good on you!”

Because we like to photograph our clients in outfits that make them feel like their most beautiful and confident-selves, we do not provide any lingerie. We let them bring clothing and accessories they love and want to be photographed in. So if someone bring something we don’t necessarily like or we think it is not gonna look good, it is not our role to tell them if they should wear it or not (we are not the fashion police). As long as they feel good in it, that is all that matters.

And in case they decide to wear an outfit that fits them in a weird or non-flattering way, we will make sure to adjust it on their body, rather than saying something judgmental.

• “Just relax ok!”

Like we mentioned earlier, boudoir photography isn’t the easiest experience to try. A lot of people have a negative relationship with their body or feel very uncomfortable in front of a camera. So it is absolutely normal to feel nervous during the shoot! But if the photographer tells you that you should relax, well it is not gonna magically happen and it might stresses you out even more.

What we personally like to do when we see that our client is tensed and nervous is to:

- crack a joke;

- make a silly dance move;

- demonstrate the pose in a non-serious way; or

Any other technics we can use that make us look a bit ridiculous so our client smiles, laughs, and sees that there is no point to take yourself too seriously during a shoot.

• “You are not listening to the directions I give you!“

Talking about impatient photographers, this is something no one should ever tell you on a shoot (in any type of photography). Knowing to give clear posing directions to their models is the number one skill any photographer should have.

If during the shoot, you feel like it is hard to understand what the photographer is asking you to do, ask them to demonstrate the poses so you can have a visual. It is easier to copy the steps rather than trying to figure them out.

• “Smile!”

If you ever had your picture taken, as a kid or even now as an adult for example with headshots, you probably heard the photographer tell you “look at the camera and smile!”. If you are part of the lucky peeps who enjoy being in front of a camera then it is probably not a problem. But if you are like most of the people we know and the camera makes you uncomfortable, you probably find it cringey and you know it doesn’t work (or it reveals your most awkward smile). You end up looking at those pictures and tell yourself you are not photogenic… spoiler alert: everyone is photogenic, you just need the good guidance!

What we do during our shoot when we want to make you smile or give us a little smirk is, once again, we make a joke to make you smile and snap a few pictures. Or we tell you to give us your best fake laugh, we of course show you how to do it, which usually makes you smile (or laugh) as well 😄

• “Now be sexy!”

One of the goals of a boudoir shoot is to help you discover or re-discover your sexyness and sensuality. But if the photographer comes in front of you with their camera and tells you: “Ok, now be sexy!”, the chances are you will not know what to do and you will probably feel awkward.

It is really difficult to feel sexy on command, especially if doing a boudoir shoot puts you out of your comfort zone. Maybe you don’t even want to focus on your sexy side during your shoot and instead work on your confidence or something else. So you really don’t want the photographer to ask you to be sexy when they decide it is time for you to be.

Instead make sure to communicate what is the purpose of your shoot and the vibes you want to get from the pictures. Your photographer should be able to highlight whatever atmosphere you want to create with the poses, lighting, and any outfits and accessories you brought with you.

If you enjoyed today’s blog, you will love to know what are the most hilarious sentences we say as boudoir photographers 😂

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